Ask Aysha: “I’m Scared to Tell My Crush That I Like Him!”
Written by Aysha Ives
Posted on July 4, 2013 at 3:00 pm
There’s this guy that I met at youth camp. He’s really cool and now I have a crush on him. We talk sometimes on Facebook but I want more than a casual friendship. Should I tell him that I like him? How should I approach him?
It can be quite confusing and frustrating when you like a guy but you’re not sure how he feels about you. You’re probably asking yourself if you should tell him or whether you should just keep your feelings to yourself. Also, if you do decide to tell him, what should you say? Well, here are some pointers to help you handle this situation:
- Remember that guys are people, too! It can be nerve-wracking to get up enough courage to approach the guy you like. Guys seem so different and no girl wants to be turned down! Well, try to always keep at the forefront of your mind that guys are people, too. They get nervous and have thoughts and feelings just like girls. If you decide to tell him that you like him, remind yourself that he’s a person too and that his response doesn’t change who YOU are!
- Try the “What’s the Worst Thing That Could Happen” approach. I use this approach a lot when I’m nervous about doing something. Try asking yourself, “What’s the worst thing that could happen if/when I do this?” In this case, the worst thing that could happen is he might turn you down. Ask yourself it that’s a risk you’re willing to take. If the answer is yes, then go for it. If the answer is no, then maybe it’s not the best time to tell him. However, you might want to remind yourself that being turned down isn’t the end of the world–it simply means he’s not the one for you!
- Choose a way to tell him. The best way to tell a guy you like him is probably face to face. If you’re good friends with him already or if you’re shy, then there are other options. You could text, email, or Facebook him, but if you decide to do it in writing, it’s important that you trust this guy. Remember, written information can be shared with others, so be cautious about how you decide to tell him!
- No chasing! The Bible says “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22). Therefore, I’m convinced that God designed guys to pursue females. Although telling a guy how you feel is okay, it’s probably not a good idea to “chase” after him. Let him know how you feel and then leave it in his court. You should continue to focus on God and pursue other activities, and if he’s interested, he’ll show interest. If he doesn’t, then he’s just not the guy for you.
- Pray about it! As I’ve shared before, I think that courting is the best approach. This is because it prevents so much heartache. However, whatever way you decide to approach relationships, be sure to consult God first. You should never enter into a relationship without God’s approval first! In the same way, it’s probably best for you to pray about how you should tell your crush that you like him. God cares about everything pertaining to His children, even the seemingly small things. So go ahead and pray about it, and see what God has to say!
What do you girls think? Have you ever told a guy that you liked him first? How did it go?