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Love

Five Steps for a Healthy Dating Relationship!

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These five dating tips can help you develop fun and wholesome dating relationships.

  1. Consider dating another person of faith! There’s a reason that God warns us to “not be yoked together with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14.) The people who surround you will have the biggest influence on your life. Why not date and surround yourself with people who are in agreement with your lifestyle?
  2. Maintain boundaries. You shouldn’t let anyone (including your boyfriend) pressure you into doing anything that you don’t want to do. Love is a choice and if he loves you, he’ll choose to respect your decisions. Sex may become an issue at some point in your relationship but remember: If he loves you, he’ll wait.
  3. Avoid temptation. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says, “flee from sexual immortality.” The best way to avoid temptation is to stay away from tempting situations. Date in groups and limit the amount of time that you spend alone with your boyfriend. This way you’ll be less inclined to succumb to sexual temptation.
  4. Resolve disagreements with kindness. Intentionally hurting someone’s feelings doesn’t reflect love. Disagreements will occur in any relationship but the way you handle them will determine whether or not the relationship prospers. Remember, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.” (1 Corinthians 13:4.)
  5. Be happy and have fun! Do things with your boyfriend that you both enjoy. Try new things together. Being a Christian doesn’t mean that you can’t have fun.  Remember, God actually wants you to live a happy and fulfilled life!

Note: If you’re unhappy with a person, or if he’s a complete jerk toward you, then you may need to re-evaluate your relationship. It’s not okay if someone is physically, verbally or emotionally abusing you. If you’re in a situation where you’re being hurt in any way, seek help IMMEDIATELY from a trusted adult. You deserve to be treated with love and respect. If your boyfriend is mistreating you, then you owe it to yourself to get out of that relationship. Don’t feel bad about telling a trusted adult because you’ll be keeping yourself safe and helping your boyfriend get the help that he needs. Remember, love feels wonderful and it doesn’t hurt!

Poll

Is dating another Christian the only way to go when it comes to finding true love?

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COMMENTS 16

  1. Posted by on July 13, 2011 at 18:10

    Thanks for that. It gives me alot to think about my past relationships and thats great advice that i will certainly listen to! Thanks for helping me

  2. Posted by on July 8, 2011 at 06:05

    Thank you for posting this article! It reminds me to wait for God’s best! He knows what I need in a boyfriend better than I do! I agree with all these tips. My last boyfriend was a person of faith.. Or so he said. He turned out to be very abusive; physically, emotionally, sexually, financially, and he isolated me and minimized, denied, and blamed me for the abuse. He used my emotions against me and took advantage of my kindness. He only turned to talking about Christ when he wanted me to feel bad for him and after blaming me for all that had happened.

    This article spoke to me. I really need to remember these things with any guy.

    • Posted by Nicole on July 8, 2011 at 14:30

      I’m so happy you’re out of his controlling and abusive ways! you are gold, your worth is more than rubies, you WILL and GET the best!

  3. Posted by on May 28, 2011 at 17:28

    Well I always make sure i KNOW the guy first! And to be honest, I don’t like to date guys who are not Christian! But believe me they also HAVE to be a nice guy!

  4. Posted by on May 27, 2011 at 10:05

    I know a guy who is perfect for me…. I really want to be in a relationship with him, but he’s too old for me, and it’s summer and I don’t know if my mom will freak out on me about it If I do start dating him. I’m going into 7th, he’s going into 9th. What do I do?

    • Posted by Nicole on May 29, 2011 at 21:15

      Hey Jenny- I know this may be hard to hear, but I would stay away from him. he may be nice and sweet, but the fact he’s going into high school and you’re just now entering 7th grade, you two are in totally different worlds. You won’t see each other very often because you won’t be at the same school, and also because he’s too young to drive. Guys already have a wandering eye, it will be hard for him to focus his attention on you when he’s in high school now. I know this may be hard to hear, but you need to know the truth and how it is.

  5. Posted by on May 15, 2011 at 13:12

    Just to start this off right, I’m a girl. Just saying, ’cause people get confused with my name sometimes. Anywho. I agree that having the Christian “label” does NOT mean that the guy is a nice, loving, sincere person. He can still be a total jerk–it’s easy to -say- you’re Christian. The question is, is he really? However, I do not think that marrying a non-Christian is not the wisest or happiest choice. I’m not saying you won’t have a loving relationship with your husband, but here’s how I look at it. And I can be honest in saying these two things because I’m going through some hard times right now with my very sweet boyfriend, who is not a believer.

    1) Okay, so perhaps you two mutually agree to coexist. He’ll let you alone with your Christian faith, he won’t try to change you in anything related to that, sounds good, right? But what about when/if kids come into the picture? Certainly you want to raise your children in Christ, right? You want the best for them, and you -want- them to be with Jesus. How is it going to work with only one parent working at this?
    2) What’s one hard thing I’m dealing with because my boyfriend is a nonbeliever? I have to live knowing he won’t in the end. He’s not saved. And you know what? That really hurts. I love him, and he is so dear to me, and I do not want anything bad to happen to him. Also it’s just so hard thinking of how the world looks from his eyes is just so sad compared to the truth. I want him to know the Lord, and to believe in Him and love Him and be happy in that. But that’s not the case, and it just hurts me so much.

    • Posted by Nicole on May 15, 2011 at 14:00

      Hey Noel- First of all thank you for posting this and being so honest, because your message will probably help other girls who are reading this too. You are completely right, that you can’t be with him long-term because once you have kids, you need them to grow up in a household believing in God and what Christ did for us. I would break up with him now, even though I know that will be so hard to do. You’ve already been a witness to him, and that’s the best that God expects us to be. All you can do is pray for him that he finds the Lord at some point, so he will be saved too. Pray that God touches his heart too. God Bless, and let me know how it goes. :-)

  6. Posted by on May 6, 2011 at 15:27

    i think if the guy isnt a christian, but hes really nice, and not a ‘bad guy'; he has a kind heart and doesnt just want sex, but loves you, its ok to date him. there are non-christian guys like that. not all of the non-christian guys are bad and only want you for certain reasons…

    • Posted by on November 28, 2011 at 18:08

      @Emily. You are so right with guys are good even if their not Christians. :) But be careful. My sister used to have the same opinion with dating guys. We constantly told her that her religion would become a problem in the relationship if the guy wasn’t saved. Both times our family was right and now my sister realizes that. The two guys seemed nice but they were not right with God and did some very unGodly things to her. Be careful and be safe <3

  7. Posted by on May 3, 2011 at 13:15

    this is really inspiring!!

    • Posted by AyshaIves on May 4, 2011 at 07:00

      Hi Cheryl, Michaela, Haylie, and Emily! I’m so glad that you all enjoyed this post! Haylie, the media does a good job at promoting sex but I’m glad that you’ve decided to stay pure until marriage. Remember, if he loves you, he’ll wait! Great idea to print out the article so that you can have it when you need it. I do something similar myself! I have scripture and inspirational messages posted at home and in my offices to help me get through tough situations. Cheryl, you’re absolutely right! Character is extremely important because anyone can say that he/she is a Christian. Truly spiritual people will live by example, not just “talk” about it. Emily and Michaela, I’m glad that this post was inspirational for you! I’m so proud of each of you for not allowing the media and negativity to distract you!

  8. Posted by on May 3, 2011 at 13:15

    I really have to remember #3 because its so hard to be tempted to go all the way with a boy. All the media is telling us is sex sex sex in order to feel good about being a woman. It’s hard to stay pure till marriage, and I’m going to print out this article and put it in my journal as a constant reminder.

  9. Posted by on May 3, 2011 at 13:13

    This is so true!! Thank you Aysha!

  10. Posted by on May 3, 2011 at 11:43

    That was a very good article.
    In response to the poll: I think it is best for Christians to date other Christians but you can’t just date any guy that says he is a Christian. Before you date anyone, you need to see their true character.