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A Guy Friend Problem

Home Forums Life, Love & Girlfriends High School Girl Talk A Guy Friend Problem

This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  ArtiseyDisneyGal 11 months, 2 weeks ago.

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Okay, so this summer I got asked to be a camp counselor at a camp on the other side of the state. I prayed about and felt God calling me to do it, so I said yes and got super excited for this experience while being super nervous too because I wouldn’t know anyone. Well, all the camp counselors immediately welcomed me and became close friends (we are all the same age, between 15-20, but most of us were 16-18:). I quickly started crushing on this one guy but then decided after several weeks to stop (camp was only a week long), well then another friend from camp came in the picture. He and I are the same age, and we both absolutely love soccer and the Lord, so we totally hit it off and became really close friends. Then one night at camp I watched him flip another counselor off with ease, so then I was a little leery about our friendship and this maybe relationship. But, he acted like that was only a one-time thing so I was okay with it. We had a lot of great memories and there was a chance we could actually have a relationship (boyfriend/girlfriend relationship). I went on a mission trip a couple of weeks later so we weren’t able to talk but when I got back he told me that the day I flew in he had been praying or me since like 5 am that morning. I was so touched and then he told me how much he missed me and loved me. Then it all changed. When he would post things on Instagram, he would swear all the time (the f-bomb is pretty common on his page), when he likes things they are all almost inappropriate, and even our text messages slowly died down because I started feeling more and more awkward and then he has started avoiding my texts all together.
He is one of my really, really close friends and he doesn’t know how much it hurts me with him being completely different than when we first got to know each other. I still think that God has a special plan for us for but if it involved a relationship I don’t know if I could do it . I can’t imagine not having him in my life, but I don’t know if I can keep him in my life. I’ve prayed about it and I even have some of my close friends praying about it and I feel that I am supposed to keep him in my life but I don’t know. I’m supposed to send him his Christmas present soon but I don’t know how he’ll take it. What am I supposed to do? I love him and I can totally see a future with him but I don’t know if I could be in a relationship with him.

December 7, 2015 at 18:47


I can tell how close of a friend you are to this guy and also to the Lord. What i feel the Lord wanting me to tell you is that even though someone says their a Christian their actions may not show it. It’s easy to say you’re anything! But, for example, if you were to say, “Look everyone I’m a moose!” no one would believe you because you’re not! With people admitting their faith that’s trickier, but what really makes you be able to tell who is truly secure in Christ is their actions and words. Do they build people up? How do they treat others?
It sounds like your friend just says he’s a “christian” but doesn’t live it out. Pray that God will give him a change of heart and his fully devotion to God. And also pray to see if God wants him removed. I know that can be hard but keep your heart open, and let God speak to you and not yourself or the devil.
I hope I helped!
I’ll be praying!

December 7, 2015 at 20:21


Thank you for praying! Things have not gotten easy but I have been working on leaving it at the Cross. The hardest part is my closest girlfriends came out of that camp and all I can tell them is that it’s a guy friend, I can’t tell them his name or initials and I have to lie a little bit about him. I hate it and I wish I didn’t have to lie to them. What can I do?

December 21, 2015 at 16:48


I understand what you mean, and its respectful of you to keep his name private instead of ratting him out.
The best way to talk about this is to with either one of your parents or relatives (if you’re close to them) or a christian girl friend who you’re really close to and know she’ll tell you like it is.
You don’t even need to say his name, just make up one! But tell that trusted person the whole truth. Because I know it can be hard but the truth really does set you free! And believe me I know!
When you talk to someone you trust they’ll help you through it and it will make you feel a whole lot better.
Those other girl friends of yours doesn’t need to know everything! But instead of lying just tell them you’d prefer not to talk about it. And of course you don’t mean it to be offensive to them! Somethings just need to be kept quiet for a reason.

December 23, 2015 at 21:22
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