There’s this older guy that is a family friend and we’ve been getting to know each other these past couple of weeks and it’s been amazing. I’m thinking long term for whatever this is growing between us…but I’m just wondering this time falling in love feels different. I know the last time I liked a guy I was just really infatuated with him and all googly about it but this time feels calmer and settled almost more real. I know for a fact that we have the potential to fall in love (something that last a life time) but should I be all googly eyed about him, He’s very attractive and seeing him talk about Jesus is just beautiful and I get nervous but I also feel like I can breathe when I finally se him after long times apart, like everything in my world calms down when he’s around. For the first time in my life I’m not so focused on the psychical aspect of a relationship its like I know that there is something deeper between us. Is that normal? I mean if he kissed me I wouldn’t mind lol but does real love feel different than infatuation?
|March 3, 2015 at 18:10|
Hey! I feel the same right now…except I really don’t know about whether he’s interested or not but…still. :p
|March 3, 2015 at 21:01|
I feel the same about a guy also and I think its real love not the other stuff lol but talk to older couples about it maybe they can tell you
|March 4, 2015 at 08:46|
I can tell you from experience — feeling infatuated right away really doesn’t matter! Don’t be concerned that you’re not “all googly” — it sounds like your love is pretty healthy.
I’m not a super emotional person, which I think actually puts me in a really good place to answer this question. When I first started dating my beau, there weren’t really physical “sparks”. I definitely thought he was attractive. I definitely loved talking to him, loved his personality. But it was like you said, calm and settled. Over the past year, as I’ve gotten to know him more and more, gradually sparks started lighting up. The more I got to know him, the more I loved him — his good and his bad, his quirks and his mistakes — the more we have those sparks. Now just him smiling makes me giddy.
’cause here’s the real secret about love —
Love isn’t feeling lightheaded, love isn’t being googly eyed, love isn’t being infatuated —
Love is serving someone. Love is being vulnerable to them. Love is giving up power to them. Love is scrubbing toilets and cooking dinner, love is sitting up late with someone when they’re sick and rubbing their back when they throw up, love is going to the doctor with someone when they’re having that weird pussy sore looked at. Love is messy. Love is serving.
A love that builds a lifetime together? It’s the kind of love that gets down and washes feet. That accepts someone even when they’re broken, even when they’re hurting, even when they lash out, even when they don’t have it all together, even when they didn’t do that thing you needed them or wanted them to do.
Real, long burning, passionate, intense romance? That blossoms out of the bed of dirt laid by a love that serves. The butterflies? Those will come. And they’ll last when you do the hard work to plant the flowers.
|March 5, 2015 at 16:31|
That’s really true and very well written “messy_but here”
|March 7, 2015 at 15:00|
That is so so true you know I think that men really should persue woman and that God wants us to wait for true love not just something that makes us feel dizzy and on cloud nine but something better than that.
|March 15, 2015 at 07:50|
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