Ok, so I might have mentioned this guy before and I’m sorry if I have. He’s my neighbor and a year younger and my sister’s grade. He gave me a ride to school like twice. A week ago I called him to see if I could get another ride. He also drives my other sophomore neighbor (different campus) and I really enjoyed those rides with them. I have not really talked to them that much but they seem to know me well. I asked kind of last minute and I panicked when he wasn’t answering. When he said he could still give me a ride, I stupidly said no. I guess I got nervous or something… (anxious) Do you think I hurt his feelings or made him not like me, or badly of me? Then on Saturday I texted him if maybe me, him, and my other neighbor (Megan) could hang out sometime. It’s been almost a week and he hasn’t responded. I know I possibly could have gave him the wrong idea, but I don’t care because I know what way I meant it. What do you all think? I was thinking of asking if he didn’t want to be friends or something. My other neighbor gave me her number, so I asked her too if the three of us could hang out. I told her I thought they were both great people. She said “Thank you from both of us!” Hopefully he appreciates me a little more hearing my compliment through someone else. And after that, he seemed to start noticing me more, as if I matter and am important. The other day at lunch I looked up and he was looking deeply into my eyes. It was nice. It felt like I had a friend. It was also like it was just me and him in that noisy lunch room. Then today in gym I was in another gym with my class and he walked out of a room. Then we made deep eye contact again. Also, when we were waiting for class to end, I guess I was zoning out and him and all his friends turned around to look at me. Were they saying something bad about me or something? Or worse, does he think I like him? I also notice that sometimes he blushes when he sees me. But other times it full on red. Then I walked out of class when the bell rang. I looked back and he was looking at me and he looked so friendly? I think he understands I’m shy and want me to know its ok. Earlier this morning I was going to say “hi”, he looked away and his face turned red. That made me not sure if it’s ok to talk to him. When I was younger, people’s faces in cartoons always got red when they were mad or didn’t like someone. Is that what it means? Even if he thinks I like him, I think that would be cute. A girl with down syndrome had a crush on her neighbor and he asked her to prom. Should I just not talk to people if they somehow always get the wrong idea? My sister is so much better socially and I thought I could be like her and just ask a question if I have one. My mom has also been telling me to stop classifying people by gender so much cuz they’re just people too. I have a good guy friend Chris. “Let’s call him Christina”. That works because he is my brother in Christ and it’s just so natural!! Almost no different than talking to a good girlfriend. So was asking my neighbor if he wanted to hang out and not focusing on his gender so much bad? Sorry for all the questions. I’m bad with social situations. He also may not like me because he didn’t follow me back on Instagram or snapchat
|March 5, 2015 at 16:44|
Hey girl. So I am going to be completely honest with you right now. I have read and responded to almost all of your posts (sorry if I missed one) and they are all really similar in that they are all about friends and whether or not people like being around you. I just wanted to tell you that worrying about this is not going to make you happy at all and that maybe it would help to try to focus on other things. When I was in middle school, I worried about friendships and whether or not people liked me wayyyy too much and it brought me so much anxiety and stress that wasn’t really necessary. Since then, I’ve stopped worrying. I’ve started swimming competitively and singing in chorus and working really hard in school and those things have helped me make new friends, but distracted me from stressing about other things too much. The right people will love you for you, without sending you a ton of mixed signals.
Also, try to stop taking social media and texting too seriously. Some people just don’t like texting, and would prefer that you call to make plans. And some people may have instagrams, but don’t use them much or don’t follow many people. It’s just social media, and it will never be as important as being social in real life.
I totally get that you are not good with social situations, and I’m not really great with them either, but I’m telling you, letting go of these worries will make a huge difference. It’s just like a constant thought that runs through your mind and doesn’t let you focus on what needs to be focused on (school, whatever activities that make you happy, God, family, yourself). I know that you really want a solution to this whole friendship drama that’s going on, but the reality is that no one really knows the answer. I don’t know the people who you know so I can’t really be sure what you should do. But I do know that sometimes the best of friends can be made when you least expect it, and when you aren’t even really trying to make friends. I don’t like seeing you worry like this. You are a beautiful girl and you were created by a king and you deserve the best of friends. Don’t let yourself stress about people who haven’t shown you the love and respect that you should have. Praying for you 🙂 and good luck
|March 7, 2015 at 04:46|
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