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Best friend is a bad influence and really mean but suicidal so I can't leave

Home Forums Life, Love & Girlfriends Relationships Best friend is a bad influence and really mean but suicidal so I can't leave

This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Nino99 4 months, 1 week ago.

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I tried to figure out how to wrap up this whole situation in eighty characters. You might have read the topic and thought, “wat…?” I wouldn’t blame you… Let me start the beginning.
Back in June of this year my best friend and I got into a fight. We had had little fights before just like all friends do. We wouldn’t even really be angry at each other. This time, however, my best friend was angry at me for weeks. (We’ll call her Katrina) I kept telling her I was sorry over and over. She didn’t forgive me. What really bothered me was, she pretended like everything was okay. I thought everything was okay for a while.
Then she got mad at me again. I don’t remember exactly when, and I’m not 100% sure exactly why. She told me that I was a bed person, but I thought I was great. That hurt my feelings because I used to struggle with self-esteem issues. I try to keep my ego at a happy medium. I don’t think I’m too great, but I’m not the worst person in the world. Ever since then, she’s been really mad at me.
At first, I thought she was jealous of one of my guy friends. I tried to assure her that she was still my best friend, and she always had a place by my side. She told me to stop. When I told her about my troubles she tells me to suck it up and carry on. I just need someone to talk to and at least tell me everything will be okay. Not that life sucks and I have to deal with it. I’ve stopped doing that because I know I can’t anymore.
I texted her today because she was sick, and I wanted to ask how she felt. She said she was okay. Then I told her I was thinking of transferring schools next year. (I’m homeschooled, but I attend a homeschool community once a week.) She got really mad. I told her I would want her to come with me. I told her that I had friends there that would love her. I want to transfer, so that I can have a bigger class. Both schools (held in churches) use the exact same program. There aren’t a huge amount of students in either school, and I want to transfer. I told her I want her to come with me. I work best with more people. Transferring is best for my education.
She flipped out and told me I was “screwing her over.” She said that she didn’t want to transfer. She also said if I transfer, she doesn’t want to follow me. I told her that was fine, but I think it would be best for both of us to transfer. It’s impossible to have a civilized disagreement with her. She just gets angry. She’s started swearing at me before. (Keep in mind we’re still texting) I told her I didn’t want to deal with her, and to just go away.
Now, she’s told me this a hundred times. “I don’t want/I can’t deal with this. Goodnight.” Those exact words. Over and over.
She said to me, “Well, that’s not nice. Considering, I almost killed myself last night.” I was angry for two reasons.
1. She’s being a hypocrite because she’s said that to me a hundred times before
2. She’s trying to pull the sympathy card. She know’s how I work. She thought I wouldn’t be angry anymore. She thought that I would immediately tell her how much I love her, and that I was sorry. Yes, I was concerned, but she’s told me a hundred times not to worry about her because or be concerned she thought it was weird. She told me not to feel bad or pity her. She was so angry at me when she said that. She really scares me.
I answered her, “You’re not being very nice either. I’ve tried my best, trust me.”
I have tried my best. I’ve kept my anger to myself. I’ve done my best with her, but it’s putting strain on me. It’s affecting my mental health. I don’t know if I can do it anymore. I don’t want to give up on her especially since I promised I wouldn’t. I’m really starting to despise her. She doesn’t have a care in the world for me. I knew before the whole transfer thing, but it was so clear when I texted her about it today.
I’m not sad. I’m not. I’m angry. I physically can’t cry over her anymore, and I can’t mentally invest in her when she puts me down like this. I will continue to pray for her, so that she will be okay. I don’t want her to commit suicide. I don’t want anyone to.
Here’s my plan, I’m going to tell someone who can get a hold of her mom about her suicidal thoughts. Probably my mom. I just can’t be friends with her anymore. I can’t do it. If I tell someone, her mom can get her help. Then I can help myself. God knows I need it.
Please tell me what you think I should do. I’m very confused. Pray for her, and please pray for courage for me.

September 12, 2016 at 17:12


I think you have a good plan; someone else definitely needs to know what’s going on, and she definitely needs to get help. Also consider telling whoever is in charge of the school you two go to; depending on your moms’ relationship, her mom might take it better coming from someone who directly knows her daughter, if that makes sense…But you should also let your mom know what’s going on, cause it sounds like you’re in need of some support too!

And if your friend ever contacts you again and threatens suicide, I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to call 911 so that help is on the way if she does attempt to hurt/kill herself.

You know what you need to do, so be confident in your decision and do what’s right for you and your friend. Stay strong 🙂

September 12, 2016 at 18:39
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