I’d like to go ahead and clear up this ahead of time: Though my best friend is a guy, I am not in love with him, and I certainly do not have a crush on him. (I will admit that he’s cute, but I am seriously not crushing on him and have no desire for a relationship as of right now.)
So my best friend is two years older than me. He’s a junior right now, and I’m a freshman. Which means he’ll have to go to college next year.
I really don’t want to think about it, but I can’t really face the fact that I’ll eventually have to see him go. He’s really the only true friend I have in this world, and one of the few people I can trust. He’s the one who’s helped me through my ongoing struggle with depression (and indirectly saved me from committing suicide when I was thirteen), and has pretty much just been there for me all the time. I know people will say I need to make new friends and I can’t just spend all my time with this guy, but quite honestly, none of my other “friends” are true friends. They all have their own cliques, none of which I’m a part of, we don’t share the same interests, and I certainly don’t trust them enough to tell them that I even have depression.
Right now my best friend and I really don’t see that much of each other anymore because an orchestra that he’s in meets on the same night as youth group, the only time we’ve actually been able to see each other in the past. (He’s homeschooled; I’m in public school. He also lives in a different city.) Ever since he had to start that orchestra last autumn, it’s been hard for me because I could never really find anyone to talk to. Sure, I guess I had God and everything, but explain to me how you can just depend on God when you’re feeling extreme loneliness and distance from everyone in your youth group and school – like you don’t even belong there. Even my youth pastor and most of my youth leaders feel too distant and removed, and whenever I bring up something, they always seem to have to give some spiritual input on it when all I wanted to do was just talk.
So I guess my question is how I should handle this issue. My best friend and I do keep in touch through email and sometimes call each other. But I don’t know what I’m supposed to do when he moves away next year and I don’t have anyone to talk to for my last two years of high school.
|April 8, 2015 at 12:48|
Anyone? At all?
|April 13, 2015 at 12:14|
My best friend started college last fall and it’s been really hard. Honestly my best suggestion would be (I know this may sound horrible) try and make some new real friendships. If there isn’t anyone worth trying to be friends with in your current circles try and find out if there is another youth group near by or something else you could get involved with where you would have the chance to meet people. The only other suggestion I have would be to find a spiritual guide, I don’t know what denomination you belong to, but I’m Catholic and in the Catholic church you can ask any priest if he’d be a spiritual guide and there are also consecrated women and lay women who offer to be spiritual guides and you can find them by talking to someone at your church. For me I found a real friend in someone I initially thought I’d never get along with as more than an acquaintance because she was loud and crazy and even though I’m fairly out going I’m very much an introvert, but we ended up doing a lot of activities together mostly through youth group and our friendship really sparked and now I feel like I can tell her anything. The number one thing I think you need to do is pray for God to bring someone into your life that you can talk to and it may take a while, but God’s not going to abandon you. He knows we need human companionship, he made us that way. But he might be testing you a little bit so just be patient.
If you ever just need someone to vent to my email is:firstname.lastname@example.org
Don’t loose hope I know it’s hard, but just keep trying.
|April 15, 2015 at 18:05|
Unfortunately, we don’t seem to have spiritual guides in my youth group. I have tried attending other youth groups, but they don’t seem to be as Spirit-filled as the one I currently attend. My situation there has gotten a little better, but it’s in my experience that the majority of kids in youth groups are split up into different cliques.
|April 22, 2015 at 15:51|
I have found that when telling people about my depression it has helped me make more friends. I was actually surprised to learn how many people have it, and after I opened up other people started to open up.
|April 22, 2015 at 21:46|
I have openly shared about my previous bout of depression a while back, but it didn’t necessarily help me to connect with anyone. No one came up to me and told me that they were suffering with depression too. So of course no one knows that I suffer with depression today.
|April 29, 2015 at 12:30|
If we went to the same youth group, I would definitely be your friend!! 🙂
I’m a senior in high school and I have depression too sometimes. I’ll be praying for you! <3
|April 29, 2015 at 15:19|
Thank you. *smiles sadly* I can’t say I’m the closest to God right now, but that still means a lot to me.
|April 29, 2015 at 19:26|
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