Hello, so there is this man who I think I could be great friends with. We work together but we haven’t talked a lot, mostly because I am shy and awkward when it comes to talking to people I don’t know very well. I ran into him at a Barnes and Noble the other night (where I was brainstorming ideas for a novel as I am a writer) and we talked for about an hour. It was really easy for me to talk to him, and he even helped brainstorm ideas while I fumbled to tell him the outline of my novel. I recently moved from a small town to a big city and this is the first time I’ve had a real conversation with someone that I’ve met here. It felt so good to feel like I finally have a friend. The problem is, I think I might be developing unwanted feelings for him. There really isn’t anything wrong with him; he is going to a christian college to become a pastor, and I know from working with him that he is a very genuine person who cares about others and wants to help them. However, I really feel like God is telling me to wait a little longer, and said that He has something better if I’m just willing to wait. This is what I want to do, because I KNOW that God has a perfect plan, but can I at least be friends with him? Can I have a guy friend who is just a friend and it stays that way? I’ve had several “guy friends” in the past, but all of them ended up having feelings for me, and those feelings diffidently were not mutual. I just want to have a genuine friendship with someone without it having to turn into more than that. How do I approach this situation? Help me please!
|April 8, 2015 at 07:49|
Hi hodgettm! So first off, moving is hard. I understand- been there, done that! That’s why it’s great to make friends and develop relationships; it makes you comfortable in a new environment. Now, you’ll have to pray about this because I am no spiritual professional, but I don’t see why you shouldn’t be friends with this guy. After all, he’s nice and kind and a Christian. Besides, you don’t know if he wants something romantic. Maybe he just wants a friend, too. If he starts acting like he wants a relationship, then tell him, “Look, I think you’re an amazing friend, but let’s keep it at that.” If you’re honest about what you think God wants and explain it to him in a calmly manner, then this guy will probably understand. And if he doesn’t get it, then you don’t need him. Relationships should be mutual, not one-sided. Hope this helps!
|April 11, 2015 at 17:49|
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