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Friend from God?

This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  ChildofGod_822 9 months ago.

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ChildofGod_822

ChildofGod_822

Hey so I have posted about this before…I just still don’t know what to do socially. There’s a guy (Connor) I’ve been noticing I see at my school and church a lot. Lately, I’ve been seeing him even more; in the halls, when he walks by my class to go somewhere. I even saw him when my sister picked me up from school. He pulled up, then he just stopped and stared at me. He also smiled. Is it possible for God to put someone in your path? I think he wants us to be friends. Sometimes I get the sense he likes me; one time he was sitting in front of me and my family, and he would sometimes brush his hair to the other side of his face, then look back at me through the corner of his eye. He would also look wherever I was looking. He looked like he was crying one day because he was rubbing his nose a lot. He also did that at school today when I forgot to smile back, so did I make him feel bad? But it wasn’t because I didn’t like him. I was focusing on something else. I also get the sense he’s sensitive like me. Would he stop being nice to me and not want to be my friend now? If he doesn’t like me, I guess I just feel like we’re friends by how often I see him. Is that weird? It feels like there’s a connection, and that even without talking a lot, we know each other. I’ve only talked to him once when he held a door open for me. It’s hard to find opportunities to talk to him at church. He’s always talking with family friends and they don’t like me. His family friends don’t like me because I was friends with one of those boys (son/friend) and then out of nowhere, he stopped being friendly, looking happy to see me and unfollowed me on Instagram. I have no idea what I did or what happened; we were off to a great friendship and he flirted with me at Young Life camp this summer. It hurts not knowing what happens, that his family doesn’t like me and their family friends with the one guy who is friendly to me. I also really liked the guy from camp. He would try to brush up against me, and on the bus, he would rub his foot over mine, look at me and blush, and also look at me whenever his friend was being silly…not just that, I lreally liked for who he was. He seemed like a great friend for me and that there was a good chemistry and connection…do any of you know what could have happened? Oh and the week he first came to my church, he kept staring at me out of the corner of his eye and someone said “Is that your girlfriend?” Anyway, it just makes me feel bad Connor’s family friends don’t like me. They always talk so I can’t really find time to talk to him. One time at church he was staring at me a lot. When I looked back at him, he didn’t look away. There was someone in his way, so he was leaning forward a little. It wasn’t creepy; it was cute and he looked peaceful. He also showed off to me once by throwing and catching a plastic water bottle. I’ve heard that I’m cute but that was only from my mom. Is she the only one who would ever think that? He’s cute too, but he has a girlfriend? Was it wrong of him to stare at me then? And don’t get me wrong, he’s not a player. He’s a totally sweet person. One day when we were walking out of church, he gave me an opportunity to talk to him. I was stupid and shy though so I was even scared to look up at him. But I thought it was cool how we both slowed down at the same time like we knew we wanted to walk together. Do you think he would have given up already? I just need extra time to learn social skills sometimes. …That was all last semester. Now this semester, we have a study hall together. I noticed he stares at me, like once when I was looking somewhere else, I looked back at my homework and he was staring at me. He was also looking at me another time and his face was bright red! Last, I noticed him staring at me in the halls when I came out of the bathroom. One time after study hall, we both got to the door at the same time and I said “Hi”. I said it back, but I didn’t say “How are you?” and I don’t even know why I didn’t. I’m trying to teach myself to walk with other people though. And he’s so sweet! One time after class, I saw him try to lean back and check I was still there and another time he sprang up the minute I got up. Do you think he wants to talk to me and be my friend? Today at church while he was with his family friends, he was smiling at me. I didn’t know if it was fake of genuine, but it felt genuine. I didn’t look at his whole face to see. He also smiles at school like I’m a friend, even tho we don’t really talk (yet). The one problem is: a while ago, like maybe in December, I sent him a Facebook friend request and he hasn’t accepted yet and it’s February. Does he really not like me or not go on a lot? Every once in a while I check and each time we have one more mutual friend. I have no idea if he really goes on or not, but could it be that I’m becoming friends with people too. I also have requested to follow him on Instagram a couple times before he accepted, so he might think I have a disability but he didn’t request to follow back 🙁 That’s just one way you can know what people are up to and know what to talk about. He does have a girlfriend though and one time when he was talking to her, they both turned to look at me. It used to make me really nervous when he did that, then I realized he’s a safe person and I’m doing nothing wrong. He’s also been nice to me, despite his friend. He also was sitting with another friend at lunch and he leaned forward again to look at me. When his friend saw me looking back, he started laughing meanly and said “she’s looking at you”. I honestly think Connor looks at me more than I look ate him so… How could I become friends with him? If he wants to of course! It just that whenever I see him, it feels like there’s already a connection and I have no anxiety. I do with most people at school.

Lastly, I just wanted to thank all of you for all your help on here. I don’t think I can thank you enough! I don’t feel so alone anymore knowing there’s people like you out there. Your advice has helped me to be more confident and accept myself a little more. God has also helped me tremendously in last few days. He picked people, movies and certain things to tell me things that would help me. I haven’t forgotten them and I have not had bad thoughts lately, like “everyone hates me” or “does anyone really care about me?” The smiles at school and church help too. It’s amazing being part of a loving, accepting community bigger than yourself!!

February 21, 2016 at 11:06
ChildofGod_822

ChildofGod_822

What to do you all think? Thanks again so much! Also, his mom turned to look at me after he said something to her. I totally respect he has a gf; I just think we would be cute together too. She’s in Broadway Company at our school and everything just seems to come so easy to her. I had to work for everything I know now-social skills and to have friends. It’s been a long journey. I am not saying I would do anything to ruin their relationship. I just came a long way and worked for so much…I just think it should mean something or be valuable, that people are proud of where I am and that maybe God should bless me with a friend at the very least

February 21, 2016 at 11:18
faithful_soul

faithful_soul

Hey friend! Honestly I don’t know where to begin you have so many questions. 🙂 Before I begin though, I want you to know that I have been in situations very close to yours and I have many friends that are going through situations like this now. 😉
Though, from all of the “topics” you’ve wrote on PI I always seem to see a pattern.
I see you, a girl wanting acceptance, friendship, and love from people around her(That is 100% natural! 😛 ). A girl that doesn’t get as loved as much as she should and a person who wants an amazing love. God is the answer to all of your questions. This may not be the exact answer you want but I believe it is something you need to hear. We look for love in guys and people. We do this because we are made to love each other, but in this broken world the only one you will find the most beautiful love in is God. God loves you more than you know. He designed you, died for you, created you, gives you the ability to have life in and of itself, cares for your needs, and loves you. Without His love being so strong we would either all be in hell right now or cease to exist. Isn’t God enough? Why do we all look for love from every where other than God? Love from man will pass away but love from God NEVER will, if we are His children and we are saved.
The way I see it is that we are just like the Israelites in the wilderness. God parted the Red Sea for them and three days later they got thirsty and complained(to Moses and Aaron but ultimately God). So He provided water, but it was bitter, so they complained(to Moses and Aaron but ultimately God). Then 40 some days later they praised God and then complained(to Moses and Aaron but ultimately God) because they were hungry. See in the end they fell into idol worship and turned from God. These people orchestrated their lives around religion but were not true followers of God because they did not have faith and trust in Him. When times were good they praised and worshipped Him, but when times got tough unlike the true believer they complained and did not trust that He would provide.
WE are just the same because we complain that we don’t have people to love us. But if we would only open our eyes and see the love God already provides we wouldn’t worry about temporary things.
I don’t write this to condemn you. at all. But to help you grow. Because when I was in your position of wanting love from a guy I didn’t see God’s love right in front of me.
So in the end, talk to the boy and see if it works out. If it doesn’t know its not the end because they only fulfilling love wont come from Connor, but God. Love is beautiful and if you find a loving relationship with him great. When it comes to his girl-friend don’t worry about it, respect her position but know its not like they are engaged. Don’t worry about his family-friends, what they think doesn’t really matter and if they’re treating you wrong they have their own problems. Since you didn’t do anything that would make them think wrong of you then they probably need to address somethings in their hearts to God and just bring things out on you.

I am sorry if this comes out as strong and I hope none of this offends you. Please reply. I want to hear from you!!
-Ru ♥

February 25, 2016 at 08:18
ChildofGod_822

ChildofGod_822

Thank you <3 Sorry I didn't reply sooner. I had a crazy busy week. You didn't come out too strong, don't worry. You did help me grow tho, so I can't thank you enough for that! And thanks for being so wise and nice. I do see God's love in front of me. It's just that sometimes it seems like he's the only one who cares about me and I was just confused and wondering what's up with the guy's staring, that's all. I don't think I like him anymore by the way.
-JD <3

March 4, 2016 at 18:43
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