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Having Complicated Feelings toward My Christian Fellowship

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This topic contains 2 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  christmas_girl 1 year, 3 months ago.

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christmas_girl

I’m about to be a senior at uni now.
I attended my current fellowship as I entered uni. I learned a lot here and had been the president of fellowship last school year. (I just “retired” XD)
However the ending of my president life wasn’t quite happy. I had some mild conflict with our counselors because I didn’t want to join summer missionary team, and didn’t want to stay in the fellowship staff team, like other presidents before me. I wanted to become just a participant of Bible study only.(We have so many other routine events throughout the week) And spend more personal time with God. I thought staying in staff team will cause overwhelming workload for me as we hold so many events.
Somehow I feel the counselors and those members who really enjoy serving God are sending off messages to me like “You can do everything with the Holy Spirit” “Don’t worry about your schoolwork, just put God first” “The Great Commission is the most valuable (if not the most important) thing of all”
But I feel their expectation for me is too high and impractical. I know it’s important to gather with other Christians, but I also want to pursue good grades and studying graduate school abroad, and to have part-time job, etc. Living life outside of fellowship.
As we’re still in summer vacation, I started to avoid their text messages and not sure if I still want to join them after school starts, for fear their care and constant invitation for participation in staff work would trouble me as I am not good at saying no.
I’m quite troubled by this state. Is it ok if I just quit fellowship and go to church on Sundays as I have always done?

p.s. I also wanted to avoid a guy I used to had a crush on in the fellowship because I know it wouldn’t work between us, but every time he shows kindness I would fall for him again. Having a secret crush on someone is terrible, I hate it.

August 14, 2015 at 23:32
jbac2641

jbac2641

I can understand your dilemna. It’s great that you want to find a balance with pursuing your dreams and still maintain a close connection with God. My advice is to join a different fellowship group that’s not as demanding and keeps you away from your crush, since I know that can be a bother sometimes. There’s nothing wrong with simply going to church on Sundays to worship and hey, you may even find a small bible study/fellowship group there that you’d have no problem being a part of. If the other members continue to ask and send invitations, politely decline them and tell them your reason. I’m sure they’ll understand. Hope this helps!

August 15, 2015 at 11:11
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christmas_girl

Thank you for your advice and encouragement, jbac2641 🙂

August 20, 2015 at 04:11
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