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High School in General

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This topic contains 7 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Clairabear 1 year ago.

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Clairabear

Clairabear

I feel like there are so many things that are going wrong right now. My self-esteem is very low at the moment. I don’t feel confident in any way, and it’s beginning to affect lots of things. I auditioned for an elite choir group at my school in August, and didn’t get in because I wasn’t confident enough. I’m in yearbook, but I’m too scared to ask people for quotes or their opinion on school events because I’m scared of what they’ll think of me. I think I care too much about what other people might think of me, and I’m not sure how to stop caring so much. Also, there’s this guy that I really like (and have liked for a long time now), but nothing seems to be happening there anymore. It looked like things could be going in a really good direction for a while, but then he just stopped talking to me, and I don’t know why (this didn’t exactly give my self esteem a boost). I want to talk to him, but I’m too scared that he’ll ignore me or laugh or something. On a totally separate subject, I’m not sleeping very well right now. For the last week and a half, it has taken me forever to fall asleep, and when I finally do, I wake up every hour or so and end up feeling exhausted at school. As a result, I can’t pay attention very well, and my grades are going down (which really sucks because finals are in a couple weeks). The worst part about all this that praying doesn’t seem to be working. When I pray, I get distracted, or I pray too late and don’t even bother finishing what I’m saying. When I try to read my Bible, I get bored and almost annoyed. Last time I tried praying, I got mad at God because I thought he was being selfish (which doesn’t make sense to me, because I hadn’t been thinking that at ALL until that moment when I was praying).

I’m sorry this was pretty long. If any of you have advice for me on any of this stuff, I would really appreciate it. And prayer is always welcomed. Thanks 🙂

December 2, 2015 at 20:48
AdventureGirl

AdventureGirl

Hey girl!

First of all, I haven’t seen you on here for awhile so it’s good to talk to you again!! <3 <3

Second of all, a spirit of fear is not from God. It's helpful when you're struggling with fear to go over the things God says you really are, and what he's given you instead of how you feel. For instance: Instead of fear, God has given you power. Power . Love. A sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)

If that’s hard to believe, remember that when you accepted Christ, God’s own spirit came inside you. How can you not have power?

Try not to feel to badly about not making the choir. If you have the chance to try out again, go for it, keeping in mind that as you grow closer to God you will grow in confidence, peace and happiness.

As far as fearing people’s opinions, trust God to give you good friends so you don’t have to worry about pleasing people and keeping everyone happy. That is way too exhausting.
Also, pray for wisdom and then have confidence that you have it! (James 1:5) Use it in everyday life–from conversations with friends to well, everything!

About your struggle sleeping–girl, if it’s possible at all, I would talk to a doctor and possibly get on a sleep aid. Not forever, but maybe until you get your self-confidence back and everything back in order. Sleep is so, so important. My guess is you’re not sleeping due to anxiety and stress, so once you get that taken care of I’m sure you’ll be back to sleeping well. But in the mean time there is absolutely nothing wrong with taking a sleeping pill if your doctor approves.

As far as praying, I think you’re distracted because you’re not sleeping. Don’t worry. God knows your thoughts, and your heart. Pray, definitely, but don’t freak out if you can’t concentrate well. Also, if you have a weird or wrong thought about God, well, don’t freak out about that either. Sometimes weird thoughts pass through our brains. You know the thought is not true. Don’t dwell on it, and remember Jesus has covered all your sin–past, present, and future.
Sometimes I have trouble reading my Bible too (like lately actually) and other times I don’t. Someone said when you don’t read your Bible for awhile you should feel hungry, not guilty. In other words, don’t read your Bible because you think you “have” to. Read it to find out the amazing things God says about you, and to find out more about Jesus and his great love for you. I love Ephesians, the first chapter tells a lot about who we are in Christ.

I’ll be praying for you, and keep pushing through this! You will get your confidence back and become a successful, happy, peaceful woman of God.

December 3, 2015 at 16:59
Mandi Pi

Mandi Pi

*randomly appears again* (I check the forums sometimes still, the past few months the forums had just been moving slowly so I haven’t commented in a really long time)

Hey Claira (and AdventureGirl). 🙂 Firstly Claira, everything that that ^^^ pretty lady said…Secondly, it’s like you’re taking words out of my mouth and talking about your own life. So I do truly feel you. We should get more credit than we do, because yeah, teenagers kind of suck, but *being* a teenager kind of sucks, so, hmph. 😛

For the self esteem thing: loving yourself/not caring about other people’s opinions is really just a mindset that you have to force upon your own brain. It’s possible, just very difficult. You have to remind yourself constantly that no one is actually thinking what you assume they are thinking about you. You have to start truly believing the Bible verses that say you’re beautiful and the compliments people give you and the positive things about yourself. You have to seriously *force* yourself to understand and accept that the majority of the time, your immediate thoughts are false, and you have to replace those false thoughts with more reasonable ones.

For the yearbook thing: Girly, just do it. Like I said above ^^^, what you assume people are thinking about you is probably not actually what they’re thinking at all, so you just have to push past that nagging (but false) feeling and do what you need to do. If it helps, be all professional about your interviewing and whatnot and convince yourself that this is a serious business inquiry (I don’t know lol 😛 😉 ).

For the crush thing: OMG DUDE ME TOO. I’m cray cray about this guy, and I literally know that he likes me too, but I still freak out and get super upset when he doesn’t text me back, or doesn’t send long replies, or whatever else (unfortunately it’s made worse by the fact that he lives 1,000 miles away and texting is the *only* thing we do)…And I constantly feel like he thinks I’m a dummy or something, even though I know that’s not true. Anyways, I totally understand where you’re coming from, because, ugh…But again, it’s the whole forced-mindset thing. You have to constantly remind yourself that whatever you’re upset about is not really a big deal. There’s likely some reason he hasn’t talked to you in a while, or maybe stress has made it seem longer than it has been…but whatever it is, there’s a lot of more likely explanations than whatever ones your brain has probably come up with. 😉 You’re too awesome for him not to like you. 😀

For the sleep thing: what Adventure said about asking a doctor. I’ll also be praying you can rest easier (I found with another friend that prayer is a legitimate remedy to sleeplessness, unless I suppose God has some other reason for keeping you awake, which is actually something to consider. If you keep waking up a lot during the night, maybe try praying/reading your Bible/just thinking about God in that time).

For the prayer thing: I have the same issues sometimes with prayer (getting frustrated, not finishing, etc.). You just have to remember that God is perfect, He knows your heart, He’s always listening anyways, and there’s really not way for you to totally fail or anything. Just keep trying, because when it comes down to it, it’s really just the effort of prayer that God cares about. If it were the prayer itself, we wouldn’t even need to pray, because God already knows what’s in our brain; it’s about us taking initiative to go to Him at all.

I was actually already praying for you (PI girls in general are on my prayer list 😉 ), but I will pray specifically for all this hoopla happening. You’re awesome, I love you! <3 🙂

P.S. Have you (and AdventureGirl) been getting my emails? I still email out verses occasionally, but I'm sure at least a couple of ya'll have changed your email addresses in the past couple years.

Philippians 4:6-7
"Do not be anxious about anything, but by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus our Lord."

John 16:33
"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world."

Deuteronomy 31:6
"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you."

Matthew 11:28
"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

Isaiah 40:31
"But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

Isaiah 41:10
"Do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Psalm 139:14
"I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

Luke 12:6-7
"Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."

December 3, 2015 at 18:56
Clairabear

Clairabear

Okay, first of all, I realized when I was reading your replies that I have missed Project Inspired so much!! I haven’t been on in SUCH A LONG TIME, it’s almost ridiculous. Second of all, thank you so much for what you both said. About the sleep thing, last night I took melatonin (sleep miracle drug), and it worked really well. I’m going to try sleeping without it tonight, though, because it caused me to be in such a deep state of sleep that I actually slept through my alarms (which never happens). I really do appreciate everything that you said, and it gave me a lot to think about. I think I need to think about my relationship with God more, and make that a bigger focus than it has been in the past year or so. I missed you guys, and I’m hoping that I’ll be back more. (But seriously, why are the forums so slow right now?! It’s almost enough for me to start a debate 😉 Just kidding. My 7th grade year was basically just me debating with everyone about everything… Oops xD). Also Mandi, my new email is clairaeastwood29@icloud.com. I’ve missed seeing your emails 🙂

December 3, 2015 at 19:45
AdventureGirl

AdventureGirl

Clairabear–you’re so welcome, and idk why the forums have been so slow! We definitely need us some controversy 😂😜😉

MANDI!!! YOU’RE BACK TOO! ***virtual group hug

December 3, 2015 at 19:59
Clairabear

Clairabear

*runs to join the hug and knocks everyone over*

December 3, 2015 at 20:25
Mandi Pi

Mandi Pi

*promptly forgets I commented on something and comes back 2 days later*

Geez, it’s been too long, I’m off my game here lol.

Glad it helped, Claira! I forwarded a few emails to your new address. 🙂

*hugs*

December 5, 2015 at 15:11
Clairabear

Clairabear

I got them! Thank you so much!! 🙂 🙂

December 5, 2015 at 17:57
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