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How can I talk to my boyfriend about college? :(

Home Forums Life, Love & Girlfriends Relationships How can I talk to my boyfriend about college? :(

This topic contains 6 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  EmeraRider 1 year, 7 months ago.

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EmeraRider

EmeraRider

I apologize in advance for rambling and probably being over sensitive.

My boyfriend and I have been together almost six months, and good friends all of high school. He’s my best friend, and I’ve always had a lot of faith in the two of us. However, we’ve never been through anything exceptionally serious before.

I’m staying in our hometown to attend college, but he’s going to a school about an hour away. And I know an hour isn’t too bad, but that’s why I feel so guilty for being so upset. I know couples who have dealt with much farther distances. But I’ve been having a really hard time with the prospect of this lately. I feel like there’s something wrong with me. Everyone seems to be excited to leave high school but me.

Shortly before we started dating, my friend told me that he said he was afraid of losing me next year. But beyond that, he hasn’t said anything. He’s always been a lot braver and calmer than me. Every time I’m worried about something, he tells me it will be alright, and I love that about him.

I want to bring it up with him, but… I don’t know how. I want to know how we plan to communicate throughout the week, when we can do stuff on the weekends… all that. But I’m scared that I’m being too paranoid. I know that bringing this up is important, so why am I so reluctant to?

I know this probably sounds ditzy and run-of-the-mill, but I really want a future with him. He makes me so happy, and I want to try my best for him. I will do the work this will require. He’s worth that and so much more. How should I bring it up?

We graduate in three weeks. I’m so anxious. I don’t know how to shake this feeling, and it’s just getting worse. I would really appreciate any advice right now.

April 20, 2015 at 20:14
marysetrueblood

marysetrueblood

I have an amazingly close friend who lives an hour away, and I can promise that a very close bond between two people is easily made or kept with an hour difference.
But I also get why you are scared. Tell him you’re worried about spending less time together, and you’re sad things won’t be as easy. But also make sure he knows that you don’t want that to stop the two of you, and that you want to make it work, but you need some help. Once you’ve got that out, that can get the conversation going. He sounds like a sweet guy; I’m sure he’ll support you and either reassure you it’s all fine, or the two of you can work something out.
Best wishes!

April 21, 2015 at 16:04
EmeraRider

EmeraRider

Thanks. I guess I just need some courage to bring it up…

April 26, 2015 at 17:01
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rinnierose

I’m sending prayers your way! You’ve been together 6 months and you said you were friends before so I’m sure he probably is in a similar place as you!
just sit him down and tell him all you are feeling and ask how he sees it! Don’t let yourself get too anxious right now about the changes ahead because God is in control!
Maybe ask your boyfriend to pray with you about it too… You got this girl!

April 26, 2015 at 20:46
EmeraRider

EmeraRider

Thank you guys! It means a lot to me 🙂

Well, I finally worked up the courage and brought it up with him yesterday.

He said that at this point, he doesn’t know how often he’s going to be home, and that breaks my heart. He told me we could Skype. And if he isn’t home super often, I guess I could drive down there and visit him myself.

He told me “Don’t worry about it so much, we’ll be fine :)” and in the end I guess that’s all I needed to hear. But I can’t get it off my mind. I don’t know what else I can do. 🙁

April 27, 2015 at 19:16
marysetrueblood

marysetrueblood

I mean, I’m glad that your boyfriend is being optimistic, but I can totally see how you’re still concerned. Best of luck to you, dear.

April 28, 2015 at 17:34
EmeraRider

EmeraRider

Thank you so much, it means a lot to me. Graduation is in less than two weeks and we’re running out of time. I have a friend who told me that it’s okay to feel sad, but to just know that everything will be okay. It really hurts now, though 🙁

May 3, 2015 at 12:28
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