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I think my "boyfriend" is struggling with porn…

Home Forums Life, Love & Girlfriends Relationships I think my "boyfriend" is struggling with porn…

This topic contains 3 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  rinnierose 11 months, 4 weeks ago.

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MeLoveFood

MeLoveFood

Hi everybody. So, I don’t know what to do. I’m 15, and the guy I’m in a sort-of relationship is 17 (he’s 1 and a half years older than me). Before I say anything, I just want to clarify that we’re in a courting situation here – our parents are very involved in our relationship – and we’re more like best friends than two attached people dating. We haven’t classified ourselves as in a serious relationship, but we know that we like each other, if that makes sense.. Obviously we have an end goal in mind, but although we’re very close, we don’t talk about how we love each other or whatnot, because we’re both young

Anyway. I’ve known him for over a year, and our “relationship” started in about June, although we were close before that. He lives 2 and a half hours away, so we Skype and text mostly. When we Skype, my parents are always within earshot. ๐Ÿ™‚ Anywho. The other day we were texting, and we were talking about some insecurity stuffs we struggle with, and then he started talking about how he was having trouble being addicted to something, and it was eating him up.. then he proceeded to tell me it wasn’t smoking or drugs, but he wouldn’t tell me what it was over texting.

He said he “accidentally got a taste of something bad, and now I guess you’d say I have an addiction to it… you don’t know what it’s like to be faced with the same choice every day and always make the wrong choice.”

Honestly, if it’s not drugs, I can’t think of anything else than something sexual.. most likely porn… our whole goal in our friendship is to seek God in everything we do, and I have no idea what to do. I’m actually seeing him in person in about a week, so I guess I’ll wait till then to ask him what’s going on. But if it is porn (or something equally bad), I have no idea what to do. I’m really scared right now.

Sorry that was really long. I’m just so scared right now, for him and for me.

Thanks ๐Ÿ™‚

P.S. Since he has major insecurity problems already that I knew about previously, I have to be really careful about howI act

August 28, 2015 at 13:55
His princess

His princess

I am in a similar situation. My boyfriend told me he has something to tell me eventually in our relationship. And from various things he has said I suspect that he struggled with porn from 14-17ish. He is scared to tell me because he doesn’t want to loose me. If anyone has advice about how to help him avoid temptation and let him know that it isn’t ok but I still love him. I really want to support him, come beside him, and do this right.

September 14, 2015 at 05:56
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rinnierose

If anyone has opinions or advice on this it would help. Especially what are your guys thoughts on a person who had an addiction for years and now is freeing themselves from it? Should you date him? How would you react? What do you do?

December 16, 2015 at 18:28
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dancing girl

I am no love guru . but I think you should talk to him and tell him how you feel but do not make him feel like your judging him , but support and reassure him you can both overcome this challenge together and always refer to the Bible for help , prayer is also key . I hope that helped

December 30, 2015 at 04:20
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HCluvsGod

Porn is a natural thing to be into. As long as he knows that it is not realistic, it’s totally cool. Even you can look at porn, if you want!

March 8, 2016 at 10:40
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Fivalina

Hello. First of all, love is patient, kind, and forgiving, It is obvious he feels remorse over his decisions. Therefore, have a conversation. Listen to his hurt and just be there for him as he tries to break the chain of addiction by coming out clean to you.; this is hard thing to get over. and admit. I have a lot of respect that he told you, that is a good sign; communication is key.
Just remember, you are good enough no matter what happens- you do not have to compare yourself to porn stars because of this situation.

March 22, 2016 at 10:02
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