So…I know this is going to sound really weird but It has been bothering me for a long time. When i get married (cuz i plan on staying a virgin until then) I feel like I will be bad at sex cuz i dont know anything. My husband will probably cheat on me cuz hes unsatisfied and wont want me anymore. I guess what im asking is If you have stayed a virgin till marriage how have you and your spouse handled that. If you haven’t, did you regret it?
|April 14, 2016 at 14:40|
Sorry to tell you this, but that feeling probably wouldn’t change when you have premarital sex…
But please don’t worry! 🙂 It’s totally normal to be insecure and nervous, no matter if you’re having your first sex before or after marriage. And you can and should talk that out with your future hubby (and you can assume he’ll be insecure, too).
One thing you need to get rid of is the expectation that sex will be great instantly. You’re new to it, he will be new to it – it will take some time to figure that out, and that’s totally okay! As long as you’re communicating with each other before you have sex for the first time, and of course afterwards, too. That really is the key. Talk about your expectations, what you would want to do and what not, how you’ll deal with it if something goes wrong or it takes time to practice.
If he doesn’t want to talk about sex with you, isn’t able to communicate his needs, this can become a problem, sure (and also the same goes for you). So I would make sure to marry someone with whom I can really talk.
And if he cheats on you because the sex isn’t what he expected it to be, he’s just an as*hole and it’s certainly not your fault at all!
|April 15, 2016 at 06:15|
hey! So I totally get that fear. I feel like every girl feels that way even before her first kiss or first make out (obviously on a smaller scale). I want to save sex for marriage also and I’m no where close to being married so I can’t help you there but from my friends who chose not to wait or who are married everyone says the first time is awkward, but you figure it out haha plenty of time to practice 😉 I totally agree that communication on both parts is HUGE. (that’s coming from someone who has made a lot of communication mistakes) and honestly, I have a pretty good feeling that you’ll intuitively know what to do yout first time even if it isn’t perfect. 🙂
|May 6, 2016 at 07:26|
Thank you guys so much!
|May 6, 2016 at 08:45|
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