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This topic contains 7 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by  Mandi_lee2014 1 year, 4 months ago.

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Alright alright, calm down. I see you gearing up for battle to defend how you think that _______… Deep breaths.
Ok that’s out of the way.
I am going over many topics in this about different aspects of purity so I may kinda jump from topic to topic but Exuse me.

1. What is purity to you?
To me purity is not having sex with anyone person untill married. I think that you are still a virgin In a way if you have had sex in marriage.
The dictionary said: “not yet touched, used, or exploited.”
But if sex inside a loving marriage “Perfect love” then I don’t think that makes you used or exploited. It makes you loved. So even if you have had sexual experience then because it was “Pure ” then does that mean you are still a virgin? You aren’t Used or exploited. But you have been touched. So are you 2/3 virgin?

So I was talking with my cousin and told him that I was proud to have never been kissed . And he asked way and just didn’t understand. So I started to question if its was something to value. But your first kiss is a huge deal! I don’t understand why people treat a kissing like something so unimpressive! But have I been all wrong saving my first kissed for someone deserving? It doesn’t have to be the man I marry who is my first kiss. Preferably but not have to be. But I still don’t want something like that to happen with someone who doesn’t value meet or deserve me. So should a first kiss be a big deal?

Does kissing have anything to do with virginity? Or is it just a kiss?

Why is premarital sex bad?
I once watched something whereas someones said that they thought that God created that opinion to protect women , because they where often treated like property and God did not want woman to be taken advantage of like that.
But say that is true. Here in America woman are no longer treated like that for the majority. So does that justify something God forbade?

July 15, 2015 at 22:19


1. I suppose not having sex until marriage, but some people say it includes not having any sexual thoughts at all. Not sure if that’s really realistic, or why it’s necessarily sinful to think about sex sometimes. Obviously, lust is sinful and so is fantasizing about having sex with someone I think, because it’s so intimate and to be used in marriage only. But I don’t see why thinking about sex sometimes is bad, after all you have to learn what it is at some point 😛

Why would it matter if you were a virgin or not after sex during marriage? Being a virgin is simply how the Bible describes you when you haven’t had sex yet. It’s religious people who idolize the term and act as if you somehow are more spiritual than other people if you are a virgin. You are not.

2. Yes, I think your first kiss is a big deal. You are sharing a very personal part of yourself with someone. Make sure you like them. A lot.

3. No, virginity refers to sex, not kissing. If you kiss you are still a virgin, because you haven’t had sex yet.

4. Premarital sex is wrong because sex is not only used for pleasure and procreation, but also to bring you closer–to become one–with your husband. If you’re not married and have sex, you really don’t know if that person will ever be your husband, so you’re creating a bond with someone you could easily break up with in the future. I suppose you could break up with your husband too, but then that’s probably why God places guidelines on marriage (only divorcing or separating for specific reasons in the bible). Once you’re married, you’re not supposed to break up. Of course God makes allowances for divorce for sin (such as cheating) but it’s not his original plan.
Also, sex is very intimate. You’re giving yourself away completely to another person. You’re vulnerable. If you’re in a loving marriage, it’s awesome and selfless and good, but if you have sex with multiple partners you could either become traumatized, or –more likely– sex would simply cease to be as exciting and intimate as it could have been.

July 16, 2015 at 16:52


So I’m honestly not really going to reply to the questions you have, because they have been debated a hundred times and I just don’t get into those conversations, but I do want to point something out. When looking up the definition of virgin you can find the definition you gave, however its in a very different topic. You are referring to a virgin as a noun. Someone who has not had sex. Virgin in the adjective form is what you have put, and example sentences the dictionary gives for that are more along the lines of “Large tracts of virgin forest play a role in global ecology comparable to rain forests.”

You should really watch your definitions and make sure they are in the right context (I don’t mean that to sound harsh btw). A woman or man is absolutely not used or exploited if they have had pre-marital sex. And anyone who believes that they are, well quite honestly they are part of the bigger problem.

July 16, 2015 at 19:00


1. You are not a virgin when you’re married. A virgin is person who has not had sex. The Bible often uses virgin to refer to unmarried women in the bible. You can be pure when you are married, and purity is just as important in marriage as before marriage. Sometimes, as Christians, we idolize being a virgin. There is no positive in being a virgin in and of itself. Being a virgin and being in a committed marital relationship are both equally pure options for Christians.

2. Your first kiss is special. There is nothing wrong at all about treasuring it and waiting for the right guy.

3. Nope, kissing and virginity are totally different things.

4. God created sex as a holy and beautiful thing between a married couple, uniting them as one. Adam and Eve were married in the Garden of Eden, before sin came into the world, and certainly must have consummated their relationship with sex. After the fall, sin came into the world and perverted all of God’s good creation. Satan wanted to turn God’s good creations into bad, including sex. Sex outside of marriage is wrong because it is a twisting of something holy designed to be shared by a husband and wife into something else that it was not meant to be.

July 16, 2015 at 20:16


In response to Mandi_lee’s comment, the dictionary definition for “virgin” (noun) is simply “a person, typically a woman, who has not had sexual intercourse”. Additionally, another definition for “virgin” (adjective) is “being, relating to, or appropriate for a virgin: his virgin bride. Cf. celibate, chaste.”

July 16, 2015 at 20:20
Broken Vessel

Broken Vessel

1. What is purity to you?
A social construct made to shame women for being sexual beings.

2. Should a first kiss be a big deal?
It wasn’t for me. It’s really just lips on other lips…

3.Does kissing have anything to do with virginity?
Not at all. Some people want to be extra holy and save their first kiss for their wedding day. Kudos to them, just as long they don’t shame me for not doing the same.

4.Why is premarital sex bad?
It’s not. The idea that premarital sex is dangerous because you might not get married is like saying driving a car is dangerous because you might not make it home alive.
As long as you’ve both been tested, there is consent, and you both know the other’s boundaries, it’s fine.

July 17, 2015 at 08:23


^^ I applaud you.

July 17, 2015 at 10:54


Thank you broken Vessel. Youre response is awesome.

July 17, 2015 at 16:42
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