Hey girls! So I have a delema, the guy that I like is super great. He’s very mature for his age, he really seems like he loves the Lord, has a servant heart, is super respectful, and pretty shy, all things I would want in a man. The problem is that I’m really shy when it comes to talking to guys I like and he’s not mr. talkative when it comes to girls. I’m pretty sure he likes me and shows the most interest when I show him a little, but when I tone it down (because I’m always scared of the guys I like knowing I like them! Lol) he does too. I feel like we’ve been playing this game for a while and I can tell he seems like he wants to talk to me (I.e. He always listens when I’m talking with our friends and he jumps to answer questions I ask other people) but every time he does this I’m so scared to even look at him for fear of studdering or messing up that I think I’ve maybe scared him away and made him think I don’t like him, also it’s easy for me to talk to the guys I don’t like which may also make him think I’m not interested. I want to talk to him but I would probably have to be the one to initiate an actual conversation and I’ve always preferred guys to presue, I’m worried he would think I,m flirting with him (which I guess I kinda would be but I really want to just get to know him as a friend first) Should I start initiating conversation? Or wait to see if he starts perusing more?
|September 18, 2015 at 09:31|
Oh my gosh. I was in the exact same seat as you about a year ago. Oh my gosh it’s so funny. I know exactly what you’re going through girl!
Ok, so how it worked with us is I never pursued anything. I mean, maybe I said some things like, “Hey wanna go shoot some hoops?” We were at youth group. And we’d go outside and hang out with all our friends. Both of us couldn’t look at each other, or at least he couldn’t. But in time, that changed. So for right now, give it time. Try and make eye contact. Don’t think about if you stutter. Don’t think about the unknown. The things that aren’t true. Phil. 4:8.
As for talking to him, feel free to talk to him more. But don’t ask him to go anywhere with you. That would be pursuing him. But you can always go up to him and strike a conversation. one other thing though, don’t walk up to him. Wait for him to walk up to you, or you two end up at the same place or something. Cause otherwise you’ll look like you’re flirting. (Trust me, I’ve seen it!)
I hope I’ve helped!! 😀
|September 18, 2015 at 20:13|
Thanks so much @CinnamonCow16 !! So glad to know I’m not the only one even though I’m sorry that anyone would have to go through such a long awkward process like this!;)
|September 18, 2015 at 22:02|
I actually saw him tonight and he was definitely looking over at me (I hate saying that because it sounds so awkward and cheesy, but that’s what it is😁) but he still seems scared to talk to me. We were all playing tag in the dark(-ish) and when he was chasing me he ran into a tree lol! ( just thought I’d add that for fun) He said something to my friends but I don’t think I should worry about that too much because if he’s anything like me it’s much easer to talk to people you don’t like.
|September 18, 2015 at 22:24|
Oh, I forgot to ask! Are you and your guy still good friends? Are y’all in a relationship now? With this guy most of the “signs” are looking at me from a distance but he’s definitely looking at me. When we get near each other I don’t notice it as much but that might be because I make it a point not to make eye contact with him for fear of him knowing I like him, but I guess it’s about time for me to start letting on that I do so that he’s not as shy right? Lol. Sorry for so many responses😁 it’s good to talk to someone who can relate!
|September 18, 2015 at 22:31|
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