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Me Without Makeup

Megan

I always second guess myself, as if I’m not worth it to succeed. And mostly I think I second guess myself because I don’t feel pretty enough. I don’t know why this has any bearing on my “success” in life, maybe it’s because I feel so self conscious about how I look that I hold myself back from reaching the things I’m supposed to do with my life… and that is the truth, I hold back my potential because I don’t think I’m worth it…. when really, who am I to say that I’m not worth it? That my standards of things come higher than God’s standards of things? Because God made me, and deep down I am happy with that. Even though every day I put pressure on myself to have longer hair, thinner thighs, firmer arms, a flatter tummy… always asking why I don’t have a girlier figure, longer legs or fingers, shinier hair, bigger eyes, a better smile… There isn’t a day that goes by I don’t say something I hate about myself and taken this so far that I’ve struggled with eating disorders since my freshman year of high school, depression and cutting. But WHY? I know if only I saw myself through God’s eyes, I’d see the beauty in myself, because I AM HIS CREATION. And why would I want to be anything less? Not hating myself is something I want to live everyday, and today starts now. No more waiting, no more crippling self pressure to be something I was never meant to be, no more holding my standards above Gods. I am who I am by the grace of God, and that doesn’t need any changing.

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8 Comments

  1. taytay

    Posted by taytay on June 2, 2012 at 07:34

    You are beautiful!

  2. SunshineSmiley

    Posted by SunshineSmiley on April 18, 2012 at 05:53

    Your pretty. Smile! đŸ™‚

  3. Project Inspired

    Posted by Joyfulnotes on December 17, 2011 at 22:12

    Megan,

    You are absolutely gorgeous! Truly! Everything from your hair to your skin is just beautiful! I too have stuggled with second guessing myself. I have found myself comparing my look to other people’s looks. It is so easy to do this in today’s culture! The pressure is stifling. But, first off, you are beautiful! That’s just a fact! Second, you belong to the creator and are his princess! You are absolutely perfect all around! The world’s standards are constantly changing, but God’s standard is the same forever. He made you perfect!

  4. Project Inspired

    Posted by Joyfulnotes on December 17, 2011 at 21:52

    Megan,
    You are so beautiful!! Truly! I second guess myself all the time, and often feel stifled by the pressure to be perfect. I know where you are coming from. You are so gorgeous, though, and God has an amazing plan for you! He made you perfect and stunning. You are his princess! The standards to look and be a certain way are so high in today’s world, but it is all just superficial. The standards are unreasonable as it is. Your beauty is perfect. God made you the perfect package, and he is going to use you in great ways!

  5. Project Inspired

    Posted by luvJesusInHeavn on December 17, 2011 at 12:55

    You’re kidding me, right? You’re so pretty! And you ARE God’s creation! Don’t you DARE cover it up!

  6. Posted by Nicole on December 1, 2011 at 19:34

    you are so pretty, don’t second guess yourself because that is the devil telling you you’re not pretty! you ARE beautiful!!

  7. Project Inspired

    Posted by emstar1141 on November 30, 2011 at 16:38

    Oh my lanta.
    You are beautiful. You’re skin looks perfect, you’ve got those beautiful brown eyes. I REALLY really like your hair.
    Generally, i’m not one to comment on these. But your story and that paragraph. You need to hear this. You are SO pretty.
    I know where you’re coming from. Second guess yourself and thinking you’re not worth it.
    I deal with that all the time. But there is a bible verse that always picks me up.
    Psalm 139. 17-18
    17 How precious to me are your thoughts,oh God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
    18 Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand—
    Just think about that. Think about how when you go to the beach and you pick up a handful of sand. Think about how many grains of sand there are in JUST that handful.
    Then try and think about how many grains of sand there are the entire world..
    God has MORE great thoughts about you than all the grains of sand.
    So. Point being.. Next time you second guess yourself, second guess yourself again (:

  8. Posted by on November 27, 2011 at 21:28

    Wow.. this.opened my eyes. the things you were saying about how you hold yourself back from..succeeding in life becuz you are self conscious and second guess yourself..it is only now when i read your article that i realized by me doing those things, i am not putting to use the potential and gifts that God has given me.
    thankyou for your expressing your thoughts. this was very helpful to me
    you are a beautiful girl Megan.