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Beauty & Fashion

Q&A – What Do I Do When I Need to Feel Better About My Looks?

QUESTION:

I was wondering how I can feel better about myself? I’ve always thought I wasn’t that beautiful. I have a naturally red nose, so I look like Rudolph! I also have lots of acne, too. I do see a dermatologist, but it doesn’t seem to get better! I don’t like my hair, either! It’s so thin! I’m also a bit overweight (at least I think)…my stomach is large and sticks out like a balloon! Please help me! I feel ugly!

ANSWER:

It sounds like your issues are mostly self-esteem issues. I’ll offer solutions to the issues you wrote about, but no beauty secret can substitute for self-esteem. No matter what you look like, only you can make yourself feel beautiful. I have a friend who felt similarly about herself at your age and now looks back on her high school pictures and wishes she had enjoyed how truly beautiful she was.

I suspect that just like my friend, you are more beautiful than you think. Pray to God and ask for him to open your eyes to how truly beautiful you are. Tell yourself you are beautiful every day, even if you don’t always mean it.

Now to address the issues you wrote about — I think that helping you with these will also help your self-esteem because I know I feel far better about myself when I’m taking good care of myself.

RED SKIN

The redness in your skin could be due to irritation. Make sure you’re not using any products that contain alcohol, witch hazel or fragrant plant extracts. Irritation can also cause acne. I’m going to assume that you have combination/oily skin to create an example skin care routine for you.

1. First, wash your face with CeraVe foaming cleanser. This cleanser is gentle and will cleanse your skin without irritation that can cause acne and redness. Any cleanser that has acne-fighting ingredients will be ineffective because it’s not on the skin long enough to work.

2. Follow up with Neutrogena Oil Free Acne Stress Control 3-in-1 Hydrating acne treatment applied all over your face. This has salicylic acid, which means that it’s an exfoliant that can prevent acne and keep skin soft.  Most salicylic acid products contain alcohol or witch hazel which can irritate the skin and cause acne.

3. Apply Clean & Clear Persa Gel 10 on spots and/or acne-prone areas. This product is 10% benzoyl peroxide. When absorbed into the skin, it becomes 4% benzoic acid that can fight acne-causing bacteria.

4. Follow this with a sunscreen during the day such as Trader Joe’s Enrich Face Lotion SPF 15 and a moisturizer (if needed) at night like CeraVe Moisturizing Lotion. I know this routine to be very effective and if you have any questions or concerns feel free to let me know and I can adjust this routine accordingly.

THIN HAIR

There are a few products that can do wonders for thin hair. You can start in the shower by using a volumizing shampoo and conditioner. Many brands make this type of product and it can be easily found at the drugstore. If your hair is dry, try using a dry shampoo sprayed into the roots to give volume. Got2B and Suave have dry shampoo products that you can find in your local drugstore.  Got2B also makes PowderFull, a volumizing powder that can be sprinkled into the roots and massaged in; this stuff creates a lot of volume!

HEALTHY WEIGHT

If you feel like you need to slim down, make sure you find an exercise you enjoy that you can do several times a week. One thing that really helped me also is to know what appropriate portion sizes are when it comes to meals.

I don’t always like stopping to measure out my food. Solution: You can measure your food portions very simply with a plate.

Here’s how:

Take a look at your meal on your plate. It should be half full of vegetables, a quarter meat/protein and a quarter carbohydrates. This simple method has helped me a lot, especially when I was going through adolescence.

I hope that you feel better about yourself soon because I know you truly are beautiful!

[image: thinkstock.com]

Do you have any concerns with how you look, or want some additional advice? Leave your question here, and I’ll give you my best advice! -Nicole

Image: iStockphoto

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105 Comments

  1. raesta102

    Posted by raesta102 on March 4, 2017 at 20:22

    For the weight one, this actually depends on the individual. If I eat that ratio of veggies to meat/protein, not only am I always super hungry shortly after, it also doesn’t improve my weight. I personally do so much better on a high-protein diet with starchy carbs. I basically eat a lot of meat and potatoes. Carbs are actually a good thing, too. Fatty foods and grease, not so much. It’s all about how you work as an individual. If you’re doing something of a while, like a month or two, and you haven’t noticed a difference in your appearance or weight, mix it up, try something new, and switch up your potion sizes. The exercise part is definitely very important, too.
    Just my experience on the subject. I’ve lost 35 pounds and this is what worked for me.

  2. Project Inspired

    Posted by Beautybeneath26 on June 6, 2012 at 14:58

    To all the girls who are “freakishly tall”
    You are beautiful, because god made you.
    As for being overweight: you weigh more BECAUSE your taller! 🙂
    Many girls would die to be taller because you guys are what they call “model material”
    I don’t know what its like to be tall “im very short” but I know taller girls are much more graceful!
    So you are beautiful, and you should embrace that!
    God bless! <3

  3. Project Inspired

    Posted by Imarunner13 on April 23, 2012 at 15:52

    I have a huge problem with my self esteem! I am the complete opposite. I am under weight. I always feel like im a walking skeleton because im so boney. Im working on gaining weight but….yeah. i also have really long hair that is almost to my waist and i never know what to do with it. And its really frizzy and i dont know what to do about that. Ive tried everything. But nohing seems to work. Also i always feel like in ugly and i dont fit in anywhere. A lot of people tell me that im beautiful and all but it still doesnt change what i think of myself. Ive been praying and all but nothing seems to be happening. I need advice on how to have better self esteem! Pleas respind soon!

  4. so_shedances

    Posted by so_shedances on April 22, 2012 at 22:04

    I take ballet so I’m often pressured by the need to be thin. I’m actually skinny but not quite skinny enough for ballet’s standards. I look at the girls in class who are so thin and long limbed and I beat myself up sometimes. In my leotard, I look frumpy and chubby. Most girls would be happy to have a chest and a butt but I hate having them because in the dance world it’s not flattering. Besides that, I’m okay with my looks. I don’t like being so small for my age and I have a baby face but it’s something unique about me, a special feature God added along when He created me. Girls, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You will get all kinds of opinions in life. But the most important thing is that you know you’re beautiful and that God says you’re beautiful. That’s really all that matters. Imagine looking at yourself through God’s eyes. You’re drop-dead gorgeous and to die for. 🙂

  5. Project Inspired

    Posted by princess of the King on March 17, 2012 at 11:01

    My friends tell me I’m pretty but I really don’t think I am. I have big thighs and hips and pimples galore and thin hair. My siblings joke around that I’m not pretty and I know its all jokes but it hurts. Even though I’m not pretty I try to remember this is how God made me and I should be happy with myself but sometimes its so hard!

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by on5ire4God on June 14, 2012 at 09:23

      I have big thighs and hips and butt 2. but think of it this way in the 50’s that was what everyone wanted! everyone wanted the curvy look! and I think it looks better than the twig look anyway! and I think guys like it better to. and about the pimples… everyone has them…. but they do go away. and I know how siblings can get but they probably dont think anything about it you should tell them that it hurts when they make fun of you! and just remember God made you and He doesnt make mistakes!!

  6. Project Inspired

    Posted by zaza92497 on March 17, 2012 at 06:11

    People tell me im beautiful all the time, but no matter how many people say that to me i never actually feel beautiful. im overweight, i have short eyelashes, im very freakishly tall.

    im very jealous when it comes to the pretty skinny girl with all the boys chasing after her and i know jealousy is a sin.
    i have alot of thoughts and feelings locked inside and i just need help a person to talk to

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Mia_Twila on June 1, 2012 at 22:29

      Im freakishly tall- good thing about that is that you will always have something over someone(literally). So many girls wish they were tall. So many people tell me that i’m pretty and it makes me feel bad because sometimes I do not feel that way. A lot of people tell me i am skinny but i do not feel that way. People even tell me i look anorexic. Then there sre those cheerleaders! They have perfect skin, hair, bodies, and most of all confidence. The only reason why they seem like those way too beautiful girls is because they project themselves that way.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by loe on April 4, 2012 at 22:26

      I agree with zaza92497 I am also like that, I never feel beautiful , I’m overweight, I have short eyelashes and im freakishly very tall… yea I also feel jealous when it comes to that pretty skinny girl with all the boys chasing after her 🙁

      • ruthie27064Him

        Posted by ruthie27064Him on May 22, 2012 at 17:23

        My mom always told me (because like you, my situation is the same), “stand up tall and proud! You only feel big because, a lot of time, you are around skinny little girls.” Basically, the world portrays that being skinny is what’s best, but everybody’s different, and a lot of times, those girls would give anything to be tall, and as my grandpa would say “statuesque.” So don’t compare yourself! You are who you are – beautiful!

        What I like about being tall, is people have the tendency to treat you more like an adult! 🙂 Also, being tall makes you unique! Another thing, tall girls have long long legs, and long fingers, and that’s another thing I like about my height! So stand tall! It’s something to take pride in! And eventually, (especially after High School), being tall will be no big deal, in college, there are all different sizes of people, short and tall alike. 🙂

      • Posted by Nicole on May 23, 2012 at 22:23

        I’m tall too!