posted on May 17, 2012 at 5:55 am
Dealing with bullies can be one of the hardest things in life. Although every situation is unique, there are certain things you can do to increase the chances of stopping your bullies from making you the object of their torment.
Will you know how to respond if you’re being bullied? Take my Inspired Quiz.
1. When someone begins to bully you, you should:
A) Walk away. If you walk away, ignore them, or calmly and assertively tell them you’re not interested in what they have to say, you’re demonstrating that they don’t have control over you.
B) React with anger and retaliate with physical force.
2. A more effective response to bullying is:
A) To report the bullying to a trusted adult.
B) Don’t report threats and assaults. A bully will often become more and more aggressive because they’ll find out that you told on them.
3. If bullying continues to occur:
A) Be as persistent as the bully. Report each and every bullying incident until it stops.
B) Grit your teeth and bare it. There’s nothing you can do but try to ride it out until the end of the year.
4. If you’re being cyber-bullied:
A) Do not respond. Instead, block the cyber-bully and be sure to save and print out emails, text messages or screen shots. Report inappropriate messages to an Internet service provider or website moderator; report threats to the police.
B) Respond immediately to their text messages, IMs and other forms of cyber-bullying. You want to let them know what’s on your mind.
5. The healthier way to deal with frustration is to:
A) Look at the big picture. Bullying can be extremely painful, but try asking yourself how important it will seem to you in the long run. Will it matter in a year? Is it worth getting so upset over? If the answer is no, focus your time and energy elsewhere.
B) Hold on to your anger and how you feel and remain angry. Try to be in control of everything that’s happening and try to get your bullies to see things your way.
6. When you’re feeling isolated:
A) Share your feelings. Talk to a parent, counselor, coach, religious leader, or trusted friend. Expressing what you’re going through can make a huge difference to the way you feel, even if it doesn’t change the situation.
B) Continue to avoid new people. Trying to find new friends at a youth group, book club, or religious organization will only increase the chance that you’ll face more bullies.
If you answered with mostly As, good job! You have just the right instincts when it comes to dealing with bullies.
If you answered with mostly Bs, you need help with your situation. Be sure to read these helpful articles about dealing with bullies. Always reach out for help and never settle for being bullied. Speak out until it stops!
1. Bullies want to know they have control over your emotions so don’t react with anger or retaliate with physical force.
2. In many cases adults can find ways to help with the problem without letting the bully know it was you who reported them.
3. There is no reason for you to ever put up with bullying.
4. The bully wants to feel in control of your emotions, so the best response is no response.
5. Many things in life are beyond our control—including the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing, focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to bullies. Try to find the positive in things including your gifts and what you like about yourself. Also, try to find the humor in the situation. If you’re able to relax enough to see the humor in it, you’ll likely be of less interest to the bullies.
6. Having trusted people you can turn to for encouragement and support will boost your resilience when being bullied. Learn a new sport, join a team, or take up a new hobby such as chess, art, or music and always strive to find good friends who share the same interests and values as you.
Have you successfully put a bully in their place in the past? Share your story in the comments and inspire other readers to face their bullies.
Image: Hemera | Thinkstock