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Inspiration

What Do You Do When Your Crush Doesn’t Crush You Back?

Ladies! Do you have a secret crush? Do you think about him all the time? Does it hurt your heart when you see him and he doesn’t seem to notice that you exist? Do you pray he notices you, or if he’s a friend, that his feelings about you are mutual?

Sweet girls, if your heart is breaking from unrequited love and you’re looking for relief, I pray you find comfort in your own responses to the following questions:

  1. Do you want someone for the moment or the future? If you’re looking to just date someone, then you’re looking for more heartache. And marriage? Unless God has that planned for you, I’m guessing it’s too soon in your life to think about that.
  2. Is he a Christian? This is a really important question if you are a Christian with a desire to spend your life with a Christian. If he isn’t a Christian, then it’s definitely a good thing that he’s not pursuing you, because only a Christian will truly share your values.
  3. Is it love or lust? If it’s real love, then he’ll come around. But if it’s lust, then it’s a good thing the feeling’s not mutual, because the lust you feel for him may lead to something you’d likely regret…and that will be followed by another broken heart.
  4. Is he the one? God already has picked your husband. Have faith in Him and His perfect choice for you. If this is the boy for you, he will find his way to you and it will last forever. If he’s not, then don’t distract yourself with him.
  5. Is it the right time? Some couples meet in high school, some meet later in life. You don’t know when you’ll meet your husband, but have faith that it will happen on God’s time.

Contemplating these questions wasn’t easy, I’m sure. A broken heart is difficult to convince. If you realize that your crush isn’t the boy for you, pray to God and ask Him to change your heart. The good news is that when the time is right, He’ll bring the perfect boy to you. It may not be for a long while, but it’ll be worth the wait.

In the meantime, keep busy with school, friends, family, hobbies and most importantly, God. And always keep Christ in your heart.

Ladies! Are you hurting from an unrequited crush? Share your story. We love to hear from you!

More Stories Like This on Project Inspired:

“Dear Beloved-to-Be…” By PI Girl Jayne

Bieber and Gomez Split! Will Past Reminders Taint Their Future Marriages?

Boys Are Like Buses. By PI Girl, Katie

Image: Thinkstock

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69 Comments

  1. Project Inspired

    Posted by MacyBreann on July 19, 2015 at 23:06

    So I have had a crush on this guy for a while now ( like 3 years this year) and I had told my best friends about a year and a half ago and they were like “Wow” since they had known him and his family for a long time and their parents used to hang out ( he has eight other siblings )
    Anyways so they knew him.
    It’s hard though cause he doesn’t come to many revivals anymore only some since he got a job but we aren’t in the same exact church ( same fellowship different location )
    He only has a summer job though since he’s in highschool still ( I’m in Jr high ) ( 3 years younger which is normal )
    One time it was revival at his church and my friends mom( who I go with ) got there late and he volunteered to get chairs for us and he hurried up and set my chair down then his face was bright red a few times I caught him looking at me and I was all blushy
    And a few times after that he kept passing by me and staring at me then I made eye contact and we both blushed
    The past time anything happened was about a month ago
    We got there just as prayer was over and I didn’t see him ( which was usual and still is ) One of my best friends where there and she told me he was there and I was like ” I didn’t see him ” then I saw him and we made eye contact and both blushed
    Then in the middle of church service we had a few eye contacts and looked away blushing alot after church my friend and I did some walking around cause its fun and scary at the same time
    And she went outside where he was and I wasn’t up for that so I stood near the door and she walks in and says look
    He walks in and stops in his tracks and then walks off again ( I think I made it obvoius cause I said Noooo ) and then we followed him around some more and my friend said he looked at me and blushed
    I knew I was blushing then anyways
    It’s crazy but sometimes I don’t see him for months at a time which leaves me at heartache
    (He’s saved though )

  2. Project Inspired

    Posted by HaitiBeauty101 on November 2, 2013 at 18:57

    I am 20 years old and in college I met my crush about 3 months ago I told him I liked him about a month ago he told me he didn’t feel that way and we remained friends and nothing change but now he wants to be near me find ways to flirt with me and get close to me and now I’m confused I like him and he’s a great guy he’s what I’ve been looking for he loves God and his family which is great but I don’t know if I should wait for him to say something or if I should wipe my hands and move on.. I know it will hurt but I dont know what to do need advice

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by MacyBreann on July 19, 2015 at 23:10

      I’m not a guy but I do know that guys feelings can change when they are in a situation
      He might have been thinking of you alot and the more you hang out the more they know the other sides of you

  3. Dancergurl

    Posted by Dancergurl on October 26, 2013 at 19:27

    I really like this guy at my school who I know doesn’t like me back. I don’t understand why I like him so much since I don’t know him that well. He’s just funny, sweet, a gentleman (don’t find many of those in middle school anymore), and musical. Nobody really seems to understand me and look at it as just a schoolgirl crush. I guess it might be but why does it hurt so bad to see him and realize he’s never going to like me back? At 13 why does a boy mean so much to me?

  4. Livia_LovesYhu

    Posted by Livia_LovesYhu on October 24, 2013 at 05:31

    Early this morning, My two friends and I usually stand with these boys 3 boys in the morning before the school bell rings. One of the boys was a crush. I didnt think he knew untill he made a joke this morning and he said he didnt like me like that. My feelings were hurt and i cried my eyes out in the bathroom and i cut my arm……. I dont know what to do i feel like killing myself.
    What should i do?

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by MacyBreann on July 19, 2015 at 23:12

      Don’t kill yourself hang on God has somebody planned for you

  5. Sarah Nicole Love

    Posted by Sarah Nicole Love on September 29, 2013 at 13:40

    Hi, um….could anyone and I mean anyone answer this question for me? The question is..how do you know he’s the one? You see i’m looking for a guy that I could possibly spend the rest of my life with I have done this for a really long time, but have never found a guy that I could see the rest of my life with yet.. I am friends with this really awesome guy and I liked him and all last year, but this year its different i kinda feel like i might be falling in love with him and that i could actually see myself marring this guy! The only problem is…I don’t wanna fall in love if he isn’t the one. Anyone got any advice?

  6. Project Inspired

    Posted by meredith on August 17, 2013 at 07:39

    The last 2 questions i.e. ‘is he the one?’ and ‘is it the right time?’ are hard to say because, well, i guess only God knows the answers. I have never been able to tell whether if someone is gonna be the right one or not, because I cannot see the future and know what is gonna become of him. As for ‘is it the right time’, I really don’t know. I am at university now, it could be the time when I meet the husband that God has planned for me, or maybe I’ll meet him later in my life.
    And for the first 3 questions:
    1. Do I want him for the moment or for the future? Both. I lean more towards future, actually. He’s incredibly intelligent, very kind, gentle and has the right amount of humour. I don’t feel like ‘Omg I want this guy to be my boyfriend and I have to have him right now’, but rather I think I just admire him so deeply that I wish he could be my husband and I could spend the rest of my life with someone like him. (I admire God in a different and more superior way). Even if I’d have to wait years to get to together with him, I’d wait because I know he’s worth the wait.
    2. Is he a Christian? I don’t know yet, since we’re not even friends, just classmates. I’m too shy to talk to him but I know a lot about him from his friends and from what I see in class etc.
    3. Is it love or lust? I think it’s love. I have had a lot of crushes on guys throughout my school life and I know all of those were lust. I was only attracted to the appearance of those boys even though I knew that they had horrible personalities. This time it’s different. The guy I like at the moment doesn’t have the appearance that would normally attract me very much, but everything else about him makes me think he’s perfect. This time I’m attracted to this guy but not in a physical way, I just simply appreciate and admire him so much I wish we could be together. I don’t know, I don’t think this is lust..?

    Anyways, he’s one of those elite students of the nation and lots of people reckon he could become prime minister or something.. he’s way too good for me. That’s why I’ve been looking on the Internet for tips of getting over impossible crushes, because I don’t want to suffer from the pain of knowing this guy that I love so much will never love me back.

    I hope God will do something about it, I really do. I hope God can make me lose the feelings for him. I want to be able to look at him and think ‘oh it’s that smart guy again’ instead of ‘aw here comes the love of my life and argh he’ll never like me and I can feel my heart breaking piece by piece’.

  7. Julez22

    Posted by Julez22 on January 13, 2013 at 19:06

    This article has been really encouraging to me lately. Thanks. I’ve been really confused about life and stuff like this lately, especially since I am 17 and will be going to college soon and possibly changing friends… The line “If this is the boy for you, he will find his way to you and it will last forever. ” Really encourages me to keep trusting in God’s promises. Good wishes and blessings to you girls! (:

  8. Project Inspired

    Posted by KelseyAyBee on January 12, 2013 at 09:14

    Very true!! Every one has that crush where it seems like the end of the world when he doesn’t like you back… but lately I’ve found bliss in not knowing who my husband is going to be, and knowing that he will come when the time is right! It’s extremely liberating to not have any romantic feelings tying to down- I love focusing on God! The rest will come later!!

  9. Project Inspired

    Posted by MudBloodPrincess on January 6, 2013 at 00:43

    Here’s my problem. I have this feeling (that makes me want to roll around on the floor giggling :3) that the boy I like likes me back. We’ve been friends since seventh grade, and we’re so alike; we’re both super-nerds. The problem is now that we’ve started high school and we don’t have any of the same classes together (not even lunch period!) we can never see each other! He’s so busy, poor guy, he’s got band, robotics. and a whole bunch of other clubs he goes to after school. He’s also never on his Facebook. Sometimes I wonder if God doesn’t want us to date after all, but then a little glimmer of hope sparks inside of me. What if this is a test? What if God is testing me to see if I love him enough to go the distance it takes to see him more? Like for example, I work up the courage to just go up to him and say simply, “Wanna come over Thursday to catch the new episode of Doctor Who?” I like to think that’s the case :3 <3

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Godspreciousjewel on January 12, 2013 at 17:53

      so my situation is that I have liked this guy (lets say his name is Z) ever since I met him (last school year) but I always denied it because he had a girlfriend. I tried to shove my feelings deep down inside for a while, I dated one guy, and that didn’t work out. I almost dated another kid, he was a very good friend of mine. and there were a few other guys who I almost dated. But they never felt just right. meanwhile, I had become best friends with Z. This year his girlfriend came into high school with us, none of his friends, or his family liked them together. they all thought that they didn’t fit well together (and I don’t think they knew enough about each other). and then one night I was praying for God to show me which guy was right for me (if he was in my life at that time) and then all of a sudden my feelings for Z burst out of me. So I just tried to hide them for a while. but I felt like he was flirting with me. eventually he found out I like him, and of course his gf was so angry. He told me that I was too good for him, and that he wouldn’t EVER like me romantically. so I tried to stop talking to him, and let my feelings for him go away. but I felt like every time I would pray about it, something happened that signaled maybe a chance with him. He started to “like” some other girl he knew, and then him and his girlfriend eventually broke up. then he didn’t like that girl anymore. and me and him got even closer (because his girlfriend was keeping us from becoming really close) and I have been there for him whenever he needs me. And I’ve helped him with all his problems. he told me that I have been working in his heart, and that he likes me back now, but he his parents are strict so he doesn’t know if things would work out between us. and that its a problem cause my feelings for him are stronger than his for me. He talks to me all the time. and he always makes me feel better, and helps me solve my problems, and he would do anything for me, just to make me happy. But I’m not sure what to do. I’m not sure if this is God’s plan or not. I also feel like I’m just Z’s replacement girl for his girlfriend, kinda the rebound girl. I just don’t know what to do anymore. it hurts so much. and I pray so much about it, but its hard to know. and answering the questions 1. Yes I definitely see a future with him. 2. yes he is a christian, he goes to a christian school with me, and I’m pretty sure he walks and talks with God. 3. I doubt its lust. He has been my friend for a while, and before my feelings for him burst out, I didn’t want to kiss him or anything like that at all. and I know lust can come from thinking someone is really attractive and stuff so you really like them. with this guy, when I’m talking to him, all of his flaws disappear and I don’t care how he looks, all I care about is him, nothing else. 4. I’m not sure, maybe God has indicated he is. but I’m not sure. 5. I’m only in high school so it may not be the right time. but we decided that if we were to date or anything, we would wait a while and see if we feel the same way next year so we don’t rush things.

  10. Exlon

    Posted by Exlon on December 22, 2012 at 20:47

    I guess the two questions I’m contemplating in my situation right now are “Is he the one?” and “Is it the right time?” I like this guy I’ve been becoming friends with over the past semester, and every now and then I can’t help but feel like there are little signs or things that point to him as “maybe” being the one God wants for me. But he’s been in a relationship with this other girl for a long time, and at least as of now, I see no signs of it failing any time soon. I personally don’t trust she’s as nice as she puts up a front to be, but of course I’m biased by now. I guess this is where the question “Is it the right time?” comes in, because maybe they won’t end up getting married. Maybe I’m just not to come into the picture until later. But it’s hard, when I don’t know if I’m hoping for nothing, and if I should just give up now, when I keep feeling like there’ve been little pointers to him possibly being the one.

    Side note: I would never choose to interfere and cause dissent in their relationship by the way. I’m just watching and waiting as of now, hoping that if the answer turns out not to be what I want, that God won’t let my disappointment hurt too much.

  11. Project Inspired

    Posted by ShaeNikole on December 21, 2012 at 19:13

    I have such weird feelings about my love life. I think I like this boy, his initials are AP. He’s really cute, funny, smart, and athletic. My friends think he is nice too. But I don’t know if it’s love. HELP!

  12. ArtisanJem

    Posted by ArtisanJem on December 5, 2012 at 15:41

    @KitKat
    we’re on the same boats (:

  13. Project Inspired

    Posted by GodGirl96 on December 5, 2012 at 13:20

    I am going through this but its like the opposite situation. There’s this boy at my school and he likes me but I don’t like him like that and I told him and I felt bad but it was making me feel really uncomfortable and now he’s mad and won’t talk to me. Any advice?? And prayers would be appreciated :)))

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by ShaeNikole on December 21, 2012 at 19:13

      I am going through the same exact thing! I need advice to AHH!

    • susannah pemberton

      Posted by susannah pemberton on December 6, 2012 at 18:54

      Mabey if its true you could tell him you care for him as a friend but not in the way he likes you.And I will be praying for you 🙂

  14. Project Inspired

    Posted by BlankCanvas-025 on December 2, 2012 at 15:50

    “If this is the boy for you, he will find his way to you and it will last forever. If he’s not, then don’t distract yourself with him.”
    I don’t really agree with this particular bit. When you date others, you can learn things about yourself that you didn’t know before. If you go into a relationship at 22 constantly thinking, ‘is he the one?”, “Will I marry him someday”, I honestly think that you’ve got the wrong mindset. Yes, God does have our man set for us, but you won’t find him if you don’t cast around for him.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by liza13 on December 8, 2012 at 11:39

      i see your point, but how do you know when to stop? How do you know if your supposed to chase after this guy or if God is trying to tell you he’s not the one?

  15. Project Inspired

    Posted by jerijwebb on December 2, 2012 at 11:00

    The thing is, I don’t want to be waiting on any guy. My prince has already came. Jesus has already came and saved me. I just want to love Him to the fullest I can. I recently had such a great guy help me on this journey of loving Him to the fullest, but it’s just crushing when the guy who taught you a lot about the Lord walks away. I literally answered yes to all those questions…until I got to timing, then I was like yeah, maybe not the right timing. We’re both in grad school, but who knows. Patience is an agonizing virtue.

  16. Project Inspired

    Posted by Melanie13 on December 1, 2012 at 14:17

    I agree with absolutely everything you said Nicole. I have my own story where I didn’t think about any of the consequences of lusting after a guy who claims to be a Christian but everyone but me could tell that he did not live a Godly life. I moved into his neighborhood and he started going to my church. After having him hang out with me and my friends, I started to think how attractive he was to me, and that he showed interest in me also. I didn’t think about how maybe I should stay away from him cause he was bad news. And sure enough, I wound up doing stuff that I regret everyday. In society’s eyes, what I did wasn’t a big thing at all and I shouldn’t freak out. But I knew what I did was not pleasing in God’s eyes and I have to live with the memories. So please, everyone, don’t make my mistake. Just wait for God’s timing because he has the perfect person in mind for you who wont want to do anything that isn’t pleasing to Him. It will definitely be worth it! 🙂

  17. Project Inspired

    Posted by liv_life on December 1, 2012 at 10:36

    I feel so silly about all my crushes. I don’t know if it’s just because I’m a girl, but I have different crushes on different people at the same time. Does anyone else feel this way? They’re not serious crushes, I just think that they’re really cute.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Melanie13 on December 1, 2012 at 14:18

      All the time! 🙂 pretty sure that’s the same with everyone

  18. sundate520

    Posted by sundate520 on November 30, 2012 at 19:13

    Do you want someone for the moment or the future?
    Yes, he was the first guy whom I wanted things to last for longer than a “typical high school relationship.” I even planned on telling my mom about him.

    Is he a Christian?
    He is not a Christian, but is a Catholic.

    Is it love or lust?
    I’m not sure anymore. I thought it was love, but he hurt me deeply and left for my best friend at the time immediately after we broke up. The fact that I’ve been hurt by him made me build up a wall in my heart and try to block him out from my life as much as possible. I thought I was over with him (it’s been 8 months after we break up); but he came back in my mind couple days ago, and I’m feeling all sad again.

    Is he the one?
    Well, obviously not. If he is the one, he wouldn’t have did what he has done to me, right? He was definitely the one of the people whom God sent me to help me rebuild my relationship with God though!

    Is it the right time?
    It was 2nd semester Junior year, so probably not the right time, but it did back then. Haha. I was ready to commit into a longer relationship than a typical high school relationship as I mentioned. He’s a grade older, and was going off to college; I was ready to commit myself into the relationship even when he is off to college.

    Sigh, and now all of it is a part of the history…..

  19. vanilla

    Posted by vanilla on November 30, 2012 at 15:16

    I don’t want to go into all the details, but I’ll just say that I’m really hurting. There’s this one guy that I’ve really liked for 2 years, but he never “liked” me. He’s liked a lot of other girls and online the other day I saw him telling someone he loved them. It hurts. Also, I don’t really have any friends at my school. I’ve been feeling very alone recently. If any of you would care to pray for me, I would appreciate it.

    • banana2398

      Posted by banana2398 on December 1, 2012 at 14:16

      vanilla…. I will definately be praying for you to find peace! Remember God can carry you through anything. Rely on Him!

  20. Project Inspired

    Posted by Mickey1707 on November 30, 2012 at 10:12

    I have a crush and he’s my best guy friend. He goes to the sane church that I do and we actually met at Vacation Bible School last year. Some days he acts like he like me back, other days he acts like I don’t exist. I pray everyday that God will lead me in the path he wants me to go and show me the guy he wants me to be with. It’s all in God’s hands if He want’s it to be…. It will be.

  21. KitKat5693

    Posted by KitKat5693 on November 29, 2012 at 09:10

    OK, so there is this guy. He is cute, goes to my church, and he has one of the qualites that I want in a guy, he is good with children. I am great with children too and I want a guy who is the same way. I dont know how to get him to at least be friends with me. He is in my sunday school class and my church service. I personally think he is very kind toward other people, but I dont know for sure. Please help me!

    KitKat

    • tmgaouette

      Posted by tmgaouette on November 29, 2012 at 09:37

      ruthie27064Him above quotes a verse from Song of Solomon 8:4 -“Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” Don’t try to get him to do anything. Be a follower of Christ first and foremost and God will bring you to your future beloved when the time is right -whether it’s this boy or not. Interact naturally and let God take care of the rest. He is your number 1!

  22. Project Inspired

    Posted by jazzygrl9819 on November 27, 2012 at 15:31

    I really liked that thank you

  23. olburrows

    Posted by olburrows on November 27, 2012 at 15:23

    You put together a nice article, T.M! Wonderful job!

  24. Paris

    Posted by Paris on November 27, 2012 at 03:16

    God can heal even the most broken hearts. Ones that have been ripped into shreds.Trust me,I KNOW 😉 Had “boyfriend” in high school.After he broke up with me,called me a fat cow to his friends. Later,another guy proposed to me and I said yes. Few months later,talked to him about the wedding,and he said we were NEVER engaged.Both boys said they “loved me,” now I know it’s not true. Turns out,he was dating another girl and after that,he dated a freshman. I tried to hide it from God,but it didin’t work. It still hurts,but he is fixing up my broke down heart and I’m glad about it. 😀

  25. clairebear

    Posted by clairebear on November 26, 2012 at 19:43

    This is so true. I was thinking about this just now. I have 2 crushes right now. One has a girlfriend and he goes to a different school. He goes to my church and is super sweet. I don’t think any guys even notice me because I’m not much to look at. It sucks. 🙁

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by liv_life on December 1, 2012 at 10:38

      clairebear- you are beautiful because God created you. That’s all that matters, and someday you’ll find a great guy that loves God and you for who you are.

  26. Project Inspired

    Posted by haley_nicole_4_Christ on November 26, 2012 at 17:44

    In number one, when you said, “Unless God has that planned for you”, I immediately started thinking it sounded like God had it written down somewhere. :\ And that’s obviously not the case. I think that people on websites like Christian Mingle are making the right moves. They’re going on God’s path, but also searching their own way for God’s match. 🙂 <3

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Melanie13 on December 1, 2012 at 14:22

      I actually don’t really agree with Christian Mingle. I mean, yes, I think God could use that as a way, but I also don’t think that people should be pursuing a relationship because they should be focused on God, and have faith that He will in time, bring you too the one he has for you. Or maybe He doesn’t want you to be in a relationship and instead, choose to be single so that you can focus on Him more. That is what Paul in the bible did.

  27. ruthie27064Him

    Posted by ruthie27064Him on November 25, 2012 at 22:27

    One of the leaders in my youth group, (he’s married, and has kids). He once said that boys in high school don’t have it all together or figured out, at all. So dating them at this particular time is pointless.

    Also, Song of Solomon says, “do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” So, hard and trying though it may be, you must wait. God’s timing is what’s important.

    And crushes, in my opinion, are dumb. I’m sure God made them for a very specific reason, but I have no idea what it could be. I wish they weren’t, because they’re superficial, and shallow, and at most of your girls’ ages, they wont amount to much.

    My grandmother said something very wise, though, and I think this applies. She said that when teenagers to things like drugs, or alcohol, or cutting, or things like that to numb themselves, they are shutting out the pain. And when you’re growing up, pain is important. It helps you to grow. And when teens shut that away, they never really grow up.

    So, yea, crushes are a part of life, and as annoying as they can be, the best thing to do is to surrender them over to God. He knows best. He knows what you’re going through, He knows your heart. I think you and your crush, when given to God, are in the best possible hands imaginable. (:

  28. Project Inspired

    Posted by cutecupkait on November 25, 2012 at 20:02

    I sort of have a crush, but he goes to a different school, and I don’t think it could go anywhere unless we went to the same college, which I am unsure will happen at this point. He is a Christian and I think we could be good together, but I’m not totally sure. For one thing, I am painfully love shy. I just wish I could stop wishing for someone to come be with me. The biggest reason I want someone is that I’m afraid. I recently went to an event and was stalked/harassed the whole time by this guy, and I hate that. :/ I’ve also never been kissed and I’m 17, which makes me feel like I’m holding a giant time bomb. I feel like there’s no point in dating until college, but for now I am just dying thinking that no one wants me. It seems like someone would’ve by now…I’ve heard of people who have nothing wrong with them and somehow it just never happens for them. I just hope that’s not me…Also, sometimes I have doubts where God does ordain everyone with a soul mate. Is this true? Does it include everyone? I wonder…

    • tmgaouette

      Posted by tmgaouette on November 26, 2012 at 18:20

      Why would you believe that there’s something wrong with you? You are beautiful and God loves you! And just be thankful that you haven’t suffered a broken heart! Plus, you can’t get into a relationship because you need a bodyguard. Find your safety in numbers. Go out with your friends and don’t go anywhere alone. As for your first kiss? Find comfort in the fact that, if you can save it long enough, you can give it to your husband. Saving your firsts for your husband!!! There’s nothing more romantic than that:) And yes, I do believe that God has singled out someone especially for you. But you may not meet him for a while. God bless you and be proud of your purity.

  29. Deportistachica99

    Posted by Deportistachica99 on November 25, 2012 at 11:38

    I have a major crush on two guys. I’m only 13, so I’m not ready to think about marriage, and I’m not really in on the whole dating thing. I think that mostly my crushes are just for fun, and are nothing serious.

    • Dani_Gonzalez

      Posted by Dani_Gonzalez on December 1, 2012 at 10:50

      OMG me too!! Exact same situation! Except one of them is a really good friend of mine, but I feel that now he ignores me unless he wants to talk to me which isn’t cool. The other one has already been “in a relationship” with like 3-4 other girls :/ I don’t wanna be just another girl he dated.

  30. Project Inspired

    Posted by InkStainedGirl on November 25, 2012 at 10:45

    I’m actually still in this situation. I have a crush on my best friend, he is really sweet and kind to me. I can talk to him a lot about my past and when I’m struggling with something going on in my life I can go to him. He goes to my church and I finally got the guts to tell him but he told me he liked my cousin. It hurt but for some reason I still like him. I’m just letting God take control with my feelings for him.

    • Lilster

      Posted by Lilster on February 19, 2013 at 21:37

      Almost the same thing happened to me this past summer. I also trusted God with it, and God worked it out so amazingly! The guy told me in december that ne likes me, but we’re remaining just friends for now

    • tmgaouette

      Posted by tmgaouette on November 26, 2012 at 18:11

      I can only imagine how that must have hurt. I’m sorry. But remain strong in the truth that God does have it covered. Of course you can’t just make your heart stop liking him, but you can ask God to change your heart. Stay strong sweet girl and God bless you!

  31. Project Inspired

    Posted by kaygirl5 on November 25, 2012 at 09:09

    I just got over a two year long crush with a guy… He’s a Christian and we meet at our youth group.Just a week before a mission trip to Tampa something in my heart told me to stop liking him… But I thought it was crazy! He was like the Christian prince charming and I swore he was the one. On that mission trip he found out I liked him and we had an on and off again friendship. I sadly put him before my family, my friends, and even God. We had extreme problems and really shouldn’t have been friends. Exactly one year from our first Tampa mission we went back again and my friends had an “Intervention” with me. They had our youth pastor’s wife with us and were bluntly honest with me and I took what they said to heart…That intervention was five months ago- its been hard letting some wounds heal, but what is crazy- I don’t regret any of it. If none of these things happen I wouldn’t have started writing songs, get closer to God, and learn some of the things I learned. I plan to wait awhile until I like another guy. I keep in mind “I am NOT single, I am in a relationship with Christ!”

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by mypet5556 on June 21, 2013 at 14:26

      your lucky, i’ve liked a guy for seven years!

    • sundate520

      Posted by sundate520 on November 30, 2012 at 19:49

      This reminds me of my very first crush. I had a crush on him for 1.5 years, and another (close to) 3 years of having on and off feelings for him. He was the guy who would be on my “to marry” list. He is a Christian; he is Taiwanese; he is 2 years older than me; he is taller than me and weights more than me. All those other details made him the most perfect guy I’ve ever seen in my life (even though it was back in 6th grade when I had a crush on him). Sure he’s got shortcoming, but the all the things that made me have such a high crush on him blocks them all.

      As for him, he talks to me whenever he feels like it and ignores me until the next time he feels like talking to me again. It didn’t bother me at first, because at least he talks to me. It was to the point where I would always make myself available to talk to him or do him a favor whenever he needs me to, and I put everything about him before mine. Eventually, I got tired of being “used” (as my mom calls it) by him. I went back to Taiwan for the summer and met my first boyfriend, and my crush was off my mind for awhile. After I break up with my first boyfriend, my crush caught my attention once again, and there goes the 3 on and off years. During that 3 years, he made me feel like I would have a chance with him. Every Friday night, after youth group, he would drive me home and we would sit on the stairs outside of my apartment and chat for awhile. When it’s time for me to go back in, he would kiss me on my cheek, forehead, or lift me up and kiss me on my neck.

      I don’t even remember how I stopped my feelings for him, but after he went to college for these past 2 years, we’ve drifted apart, we aren’t even friends anymore. We literally don’t talk anymore, which made me a little sad, but oh wells. It was still a good memory and I’m glad that I get to meet him and had a crush on him.

      Oops, that was a really long post of my feelings. 😛

  32. Project Inspired

    Posted by nothing is impossible26 on November 25, 2012 at 08:32

    This helps me a lot so ill know what i should do if i do get into a deep relationship with someone. but i also think that finding someone is hard so girls don’t try get a boyfriend just to impress someone or anything else.

  33. Project Inspired

    Posted by XxAshez55xX on November 25, 2012 at 07:56

    My situation almost exactly-except I’m too young to be thinking about marriage. I’ve never really dated anyone, so I’d like the experience, and my crush is a true Christian so that is a huge plus for me. Our lockers are two away, we share a couple classes, and even talked a couple times. I could see us going somewhere; I’m not sure about courtship or marriage, but he is an honest, lovely guy who I could see myself really falling for. I guess that’s bad if he doesn’t return my feelings, but I suppose only time and God can tell. He would be a good match for me, I think, but He will let me know in due time.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Godspreciousjewel on January 12, 2013 at 17:17

      just be careful not to fall for him before he falls for you!! I’ve made that bad mistake before.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by KTLove on January 10, 2013 at 18:09

      Are you in high school? I feel the same way but I’m in 8th grade….young I know 🙂

  34. Project Inspired

    Posted by EpicStepek on November 24, 2012 at 20:03

    Remember girls, if it’s meant to be, then it will be.

  35. Project Inspired

    Posted by BreJoy123 on November 24, 2012 at 17:46

    Thank you so much for this !!!! I needed this so bad… haha i guess i’m a slightly boy crazy teenage girl haha 😛

  36. ArtisanJem

    Posted by ArtisanJem on November 24, 2012 at 17:38

    I was actually thinking of this right now , thank you.

  37. pinkgodlover

    Posted by pinkgodlover on November 24, 2012 at 14:03

    bethluvstheafters…..I LOVE THE AFTERS TOO WE SHOULD TOTALLY TALK SOMETIME!!

  38. Project Inspired

    Posted by Casserole on November 24, 2012 at 13:42

    I’m sorry if this is a bit off topic but everyone on this website seems to be saying that courtship is the way to go. I feel like it seems like a good idea in theory, but I have heard many stories from girls who have been completely devastated by their courtship experience. Of course, there are many girls who have been damaged by dating, but it seems more intense with courting. I feel like courtship is portrayed as being entirely 100% fool-proof. That every courtship will end in marriage. What about the ones that don’t? What about the girls who have put all their faith in courting only for the relationship not to work. Don’t they feel like failures, thinking “Everyone told me this was guaranteed to work. What happened?”? Because dating is more casual, it can lead to temptation and other stuff, but almost everyone knows that you rarely marry the first person you date. Won’t a failed courtship damage a girl more than a failed dating relationship? And yes, I know that many courtships do work out, but is it really that much better than dating? I’m not an expert on either type of relationship, so I’d like to know for myself. Is courtship better for some people, while dating is better for others? I’m curious.

    • XcanaceX

      Posted by XcanaceX on November 29, 2012 at 17:03

      Courtship works for some people, but for most (like me!) dating is the healthier choice. Everybody is different 🙂

    • MegDance

      Posted by MegDance on November 24, 2012 at 22:06

      “Our lives define our words” was something Joshua Harris wrote when asked about godly daters and serial courters. Courtship is a term I use to try to emphasize the importance of building a friendship separate from an emotional/physical connection. I’m going in thinking about God’s best interest for both of us, if we’ll be more fruitful for Him together rather than separate and I don’t want anything selfish to cloud my hearing His will for me. I’m single right now and I had one relationship where we kept our distance and I’m so thankful we did because I learned SO much! Does that help?

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Journalistlove on November 24, 2012 at 15:58

      Well the only way to know is when God knocks you over the head and shows you the right one, whether dating or courting. Although it’s okay and completely normal to get a crush, in order to have a thriving relationship, it really is better for it to be God ordained.

    • tmgaouette

      Posted by tmgaouette on November 24, 2012 at 14:28

      Courtships don’t always end in marriage. The idea is that you court someone you can see yourself marrying. The courtship is to learn more about the person so that you can determine whether they’re compatible, and vice versa. The relationship is not casual like dating and it’s not complicated by intimacy.

  39. bethluvstheafters

    Posted by bethluvstheafters on November 24, 2012 at 11:25

    its hard, because this IS basically the story between my crush and me. To me it almost feels like he is purposely ignoring me because we NEVER talk or ANYTHING except on very rare occasions. 1) I do want to court in life and get married. 2) Yes, he is a christian and he goes to my youth group, thats how i know him. 3) I would like to think so but it probably is just teenage infatuation. 4) I have yet to know……. 5) Definitely not i guess. I received a word from God when I was a kid that I would meet my husband in high school and I am in 8th grade.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by KTLove on January 10, 2013 at 18:07

      Me too… I try to talk but it gets so awkward that I walk away :/ and hey I’m in 8th grade too

  40. Deeblves3

    Posted by Deeblves3 on November 24, 2012 at 10:27

    I’ve just faced this situation recently!and I had talked to my youth leader all about it, she was going through the same exact thing! (God works so mysteriously) We both had told each other we are waiting for that man of God for us that we can be with forever. When I was facing thoughts and feelings towards this guy I see at school, i asked myself “Is he going to bring me closer to Christ?” “Does he put his trust in God?” “Will he open doors for in my relationship with God?” He was a believer but not the Full-on Christian life. Each day I prayed that God would help me look at him as a brother, and constantly asking God to stop these feelings if they aren’t from him. It was a struggle, but there is victory with Christ always! As of today, I know that there is victory because God knew what I was facing, and he has it in his hands now. Pray that God will help you look at guys the way he does!

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by bluerose333 on December 4, 2012 at 09:13

      wow your so right!! God does work mysteriously!! and you have inspired me to always ask God if the boy I like is really right for me!! thanks!