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Christian Life

5 Ways to Show Love to the “Unlovable”


Ladies, it’s not easy loving an “unlovable” person, is it?

Do you know of a person you really don’t want to love? Maybe she’s rude or mean, and she gives you all the reasons not to love her. But don’t let her or anyone else determine who you need to be as a strong, devoted and loving child of God.

To love the unlovable is a challenge, for sure. It’s even a skill. But regardless of the difficulty, it is a necessity, and one that comes with much patience and prayer. So, I’m challenging you to love the unlovable, regardless. And here’s how you may be persuaded.

  1. Recognize their pain. Unhappy people are usually hurting. They’re often going through some kind of sadness in their lives. Not that this is an excuse, but still, it’s a reminder that their unlovable-ness is the result of feeling unloved. It’s kind of a catch-22 thing, but loving them back, regardless of how they treat you, could really have a positive impact. So take a chance!
  2. Put your pride aside. Step up as a Christian. Seriously! Pride and arrogance and all those other negative sentiments stand in our way of behaving the way we’re supposed to. These are Satan’s tools for avoiding, resisting or refusing to do as God wills us to do. God is love and Satan wants to destroy it. Don’t let him.
  3. Remember your love for Jesus. Your love for others is a reflection of your love for Jesus. So, during those moments of stubbornness or doubt, remember your love for Him and let that inspire you to set your defenses aside and just put love first.
  4. Don’t take it personally. It may not be you that the unlovable person has it in for. It’s likely that this person is also unlovable to others and because of others. So don’t make it about you. Make it about her.
  5. Remember that you’re unlovable at times, too. Aren’t we all? And even in those moments when we’re acting unlovable, we still want to be loved by others. Am I right? So remember your own moments when you felt that you were undeserving of being loved, but still wished for it.

For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:46-48)


Ladies, do you have an unlovable someone you just don’t want to love? Share your story—we so love to hear from you!

Contact me via social media for any questions, advice, prayer or just to say hello:
Facebook: facebook.com/TMGaouette
Twitter: @TMGaouette

Image: Lightstock | Gino SM


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  1. Project Inspired

    Posted by Theaternerd on January 14, 2018 at 14:14

    I love this!!!! 🙂

  2. ReaganthePK15

    Posted by ReaganthePK15 on March 29, 2015 at 18:46

    A good song that goes with this is “Forgiveness” by Matthew West. Give it a listen. It’s a good song for this topic.

  3. Smylinggirl

    Posted by Smylinggirl on March 21, 2015 at 05:31

    There is this girl who is several years younger than me and I just don’t want to be around her, but she seems to really like me. I try and remind myself that this is the time for me to be a role model, but I am dreading when she is in high school with me. Since there was someone else once like this too and I can be around her now (even though we will never be besties), I know I can do it; it’s just hard because I don’t want to do it.