Advice from Nicole: My Facebook Rules Guide (You Need to Read This!)

    Hi beautiful Project Inspired girls!

    Almost every one I know or communicate with is on Facebook. If you’re not, then I applaud you for removing one technological distraction from your life.

    If you’re like me, then you use Facebook to interact positively with friends and family, and share the word of God. Truthfully, that’s what excites me the most about Facebook! Not sharing photos of my food (not that there’s anything wrong with that!) or even posting pictures of my outfits (though I have to admit, it’s a lot of fun for me to do, and I like to show you girls fashionably modest clothing options), but sharing His word is the best part of social media for me.

    However, there is a lot of inappropriate behavior on social media, and certain things that I really believe are dangerous. Here are my thoughts:

    1. NEVER post your home address or phone number. That is an automatic signal for stalkers or thieves to come into your house and steal. Also, you don’t want your personal phone number to be in the hands of any bully who wants to harass you. Truthfully, you shouldn’t even put the school you go to in your “About Me” section. My opinion is that you only put your state, and at the most, your city. Even posting your email address publicly can put you on spam lists, so only share it with trusted sites and friends.

    2. Always make sure your photos are completely private, as well as your timeline and personal information. Facebook makes it really easy to think that your settings are on private, but it turns out that your “profile pictures” album is public. Double-check, and have a friend or family member check when they are not logged on as themselves.

    3. If you go out of town, my opinion is it’s best NOT to mention it until you come back from your vacation so your house is not susceptible to being robbed. PLEASE make sure to not say how long you will be gone on Facebook. Don’t say, “I can’t wait to go NYC in January for three weeks, we leave on the 15!” That alerts potential thieves that you and your family won’t be home.

    4. Please don’t take or send provocative photos of yourself ANYWHERE–not on your cell phone, to a friend or boyfriend, or just for yourself to keep. I recently read a statistic that said 95 percent of all “sexy” pictures that people take of themselves end up in the wrong hands, and then they are are humiliated and regret taking them. This also sets yourself up to get bullied. Please do yourself a favor and never take compromising photos of yourself.

    5. Don’t use status updates to hurt or make someone mad, because ultimately you are just hurting yourself. In addition, it is not classy.

    6. Don’t ever use profanity online. It comes across even harsher than saying it in real life, and it gives people the wrong message about you. Point blank period.

    7. Take the time to make someone’s day. I like to comment on photos of people I don’t usually talk to and say something nice to them. It’s amazing how a simple “You look pretty” can really brighten someone’s day!

    8. Kindness is contagious! If you share a Godly message or an inspiring quote on your wall, often people will click “share” and post it on their wall too, so all of their friends can see it! That way you are inspiring a whole different audience, just from your simple picture.

    9. If you or someone you know is being bullied, you need to report the person. Write exactly what they are saying to you in an email and send to the Facebook moderator. In addition, if you know them and they go to your school, print out the harsh words they are saying to you and show your parents, as well as the principal of your school. Cyber bullying is dangerous and a real threat to your emotional esteem. If their bullying is life-threatening, you can even print it out and show it to your local police so they are aware of who is harassing you.

    10. Lastly and most importantly, share your love for God on Facebook! It’s so inspiring and rewarding to do so. It really makes people think about their own relationship with God, and that’s a great thing! You also could be witnessing to someone over the Internet you don’t even know!

    God bless you girls, and I hope you learned something! Think about what you could do to be safer on Facebook and let me know in the comments! I love you!

    Nicole Weider is a Salem, Oregon native who moved to Los Angeles and quickly found success as a fashion model at the age of 17. Today, Nicole is an active wife, mom, producer, actress and author and has made it her mission to share her personal story, the bright moments and the challenges, with young women around the world.


    1. Well, I don’t have a Facebook, but I must say, those guidelines are really helpful and totally worthwhile! And I think it goes for more than just Facebook, but the internet in general.

    2. I would suggest people check out Kin Komando’s site, and type in “Facebook privacy settings you need to check now.” There’s a lot of good info on what to check to make sure that you’re not sharing anything with the wrong people on accident. It’s not 100% up-to-date since it was written November of 2011, but it gives you a good idea of what to check. I’d also check each time they change their look. When it switched us over to timeline, I had to go change some things to make sure they were still private. If you haven’t already, I’d suggest you do that as soon as possible.

      I really like the idea of randomly saying something encouraging to someone on Facebook. 🙂

    3. THANK YOU FOR THIS NICOLE!I’m really proud to say I ‘passed’ your pointers, and I love how you said ‘It’s no classy’ – I think if people used the adjective ‘classy’ to describe themselves and try to live up to it, the world would be a much cleaner (and prettier) place… next time I am tempted to do something that is a little provocative or presumptuous, I will just think ‘Is this classy?’ and also ‘What would God say?’

    4. I deleted my Facebook! And although I miss talking to my friends, it was worth it.
      Oh and this is kind of off subject, but I’m getting baptized tomorrow! 🙂 I’m really excited but nervous 🙂 pray for me?

    5. Sorry this isn’t related to the article, but I had a website suggestion. I was thinking it would be nice to have some kind of Project Inspired email where us girls could send prayer requests. I know I have some things in my life I would really like to have you guys pray for, and I think a lot of other girls may really like a prayer-circle type forum too.

      • Sarcasm is part of my identity. It CAN be used in a manner that is understood if you’re good with word choice and your friends really know you. I usually add some kind of face at the end, too, just to make sure it’s not misinterpreted. Like this: -___- or >__<

        • Then why friend them at all if your just going to delete them? Might as well not say you’re friends with them and then go and delete them.

        • Ya know, I’m really sorry for saying what I said out of spite. I was really wrong. I can get why it is annoying when people post relgious quotes and things like that…I don’t agree that it is annoying.. Anyways, I’m sorry for posting the first response that I posted.

        • Nah, it was a valid question. I only friend people who I know personally and have met face-to-face or someone I know through one of those friends (only one level of separation). So, keeping in touch via facebook/friending/unfriending aren’t all that significant for us. These friends that I have aren’t likely to post that kind of stuff on a regular basis anyway; I’ve only had to unfriend one person who did that. I knew her from high school, and I know she’s a sweet and lovely person…I just neither wanted nor needed a million links to Joyce Meyer sermons/talks/whatever clogging up my newsfeed. >__<

        • You unfriend people like that? Well Eurydice you need to understand that their not afraid to share God’s word. Nothing wrong with them sharing what God is doing in their lives. If you don’t like it just ignore it or accept the fact these people are not afraid to stand up for what they believe in. You a christian, so you say, and yet you continue to bash others and stand up for pretty much everything against God’s word. You don’t live for God by twisting and molding his word to please your standards and beliefs. If you are a christian then you must hear from God and what HE wants not YOU. Sorry but you really need to think about these things more often.(Thank you for Reading. And we await more Sarcasm)(No offense meant)

    6. Tip for girls who have trouble with it consuming time: Give your password to a trustworthy friend or family member, and have them change it! Let them know your issue and set up a time limit with them. When time’s up, they give you your new password, and you will be less addicted because you took the time to see the world around you.
      I love doing this during Finals week, and on retreat weekends with church, or just really busy. It really helps me focus on what’s important!

    7. I have my phone number and email addressed on my fb because there are privacy settings that allow me to decide who can see them. I don’t friend request anyone I don’t know personally or through a friend because I don’t see the point, so I have my contact information set to Friends Only and everything else to Friends of Friends only.

    8. I have a Facebook, though only to keep up with out-of-state friends, but I don’t really use it that much. I’ll be on for an hour a day, tops, but I don’t just sit around on there waiting for someone to chat with me XD I’ll definitely check my privacy settings again, though having people see my profile doesn’t bother me. None of my profile pics are actually even me, so whatever.

      I’m also friends with my mom on there, so I think twice about anything I tend to post 😀

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