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    Am I Idolizing My Boyfriend or Husband?

    Project Inspired started a group specifically for Girl Talk questions, which typically come from the Girl Talk chat wall on Facebook.

    To join the chat, click here.

    This week, I wanted to discuss the topic of idolatry pertaining to romantic relationships. Many girls can get caught up in their circumstances and also whether a guy loves them or not. We need to be careful to not put our identity or lose ourselves in a romantic fling or even a serious commitment. I’ve noticed in life that the desire to be with a certain guy can subconsciously become idolatry. The desire for love or even marriage is not wrong, but when you get distracted or think about the person more than God, that person becomes an idol. We need to guard our hearts and make sure Jesus is first in ALL things. We have to be sure that our faith does not waver whether we have a guy in our life or not.


    To the woman he said, “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16)

    …most of them did not please God. So they died, and their bodies were scattered all over the desert. What happened to them is a warning to keep us from wanting to do the same evil things… So don’t worship idols. (1 Corinthians 10:5-6)


    God desires for us to be loved, and He created marriage and romance. But remember that Eve’s curse is that she would desire for her husband, and the man would work by the sweat of his brow because of sin in the earth. God is jealous for us, not in a bad way, but He wants our WHOLE heart. We must worship and honor God regardless of circumstances, whether we go through a breakup or are single. Your faith should not be shaken if your boyfriend takes a break with you or if you’re still waiting for “The One.” Of course, we are humans and we all want to be loved and pursued, but until you realize you are pursued by the King of Kings and are satisfied first in this, you will never be content.


    Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. (Exodus 14:14)

    Do not make idols or set up an image or a sacred stone for yourselves, and do not place a carved stone in your land to bow down before it. I am the LORD your God. (Leviticus 26:1)


    Of course, most girls want a Cinderella story and want their Prince Charming, but we cannot love our guy more than God. We must surrender our temporary circumstances, unknowns and trials.

    If you’re going through a breakup or are in a season of waiting, I encourage you to worship and seek the Lord. Remember that thankfulness always invites God’s presence in and brings us peace. I encourage you to surrender to God’s plan and purpose for your life and trust in Him as the rock of your life.

    Sometimes God will test us in our lives for idolatry, just as He did with Moses. God tested Abraham to see if He loved God more than His son Isaac. Since Abraham was willing to give up his prized son whom he waited years for, God honored him by sending the ram in the thicket to prove He would provide.


    Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.” (Genesis 22: 1-2)


    God may test you at times in life to see if you will give up what is most precious to you. Just trust God and realize He loves you so much and has the best plan for your life. I encourage you to surrender, walk in peace and do not fear when it comes to romantic relationships. Don’t let your boyfriend or fiancé become an idol, because just as quickly as God allows the relationship, He can test it as well. God is a good Father and wants the best for you. He knows when you honor Him first. You are the most free and the most fruitful in your life. God doesn’t test us to be mean; rather, we’re more effective in our callings when we have balance and build our lives on the rock versus sinking sand (Matthew 7:24).

    Here’s a question I want you to ask yourself: If you feel you could be falling into idolatry, are you thinking of someone or something more than God? Next, ask God to show you where you can grow in your faith walk. If you feel you may have put someone up on a pedestal higher than or equal to God, ask the Lord for forgiveness. Jesus is so faithful to redeem and to keep His Holy Spirit near us a comforter and sustainer. One thing that is so empowering and comforting to know is that God is always with us. No matter what man does, we know that God NEVER leaves us nor forsakes us (Deuteronomy 31:6).

    PI Girls, have you struggled with putting a boyfriend or husband as an idol in your life? Comment below for prayer.

    Christi Given
    Christi Givenhttp://www.christigiven.com
    Christi Given is a former Trinity Broadcasting Network host for the JUCE TV NETWORK, and has been featured on the Hillsong Channel. Her passion is to reach the youth with the Gospel and her music. Given has been writing for Project Inspired since 2011, and hopes to encourage the younger generation in their faith.

    Project Inspired

    We here at Project Inspired want to guide and inspire teen girls to be true to themselves and to God. We want to show young girls how to be people of value and confidence – how to be your own best selves – through leading a Christian life. Who are we? We're a team of girls, like you. We edit the site, we post to social media, we hang out in the chat rooms and forums. We talk with you, we listen to you, and we love you!

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