This is a silly picture my friend took of me without makeup one day at the park. When I was younger, I would pack on eyeliner, mascara, foundation.. you name it, it was all over my face. I completely masked myself with makeup. I had horrible self-esteem and suicidal issues, and more added up on top of that due to an awful, mentally abusive relationship with the first guy I dated at the age of 13, and I ended up pregnant and had my baby boy at the age of 14. At the age of 15, I was diagnosed with dysthymia and major depressive disorder, otherwise known as “double depression”. Most of the time I was unable to function and would lay in heap on my bed and cry for hours. Even though they’d give me medication that was supposed to make everything better.. it was not.
Since then, I have found God, and he has made me brand new. I know, I know.. it sounds unrealistic, but from the exact moment I gave my life to Christ, everything about me changed. My views on things, the way I saw life.. everything, brand new. The old me and past things that happened, it was like I knew they had happened, but it seemed unreal. I didn’t care.. my mistakes didn’t define me anymore. I didn’t hate myself for everything I had done. I had been born again, and I was a new creation.
I’m currently the mother of a handsome little toddler, engaged to the most wonderful man I could have ever asked for, and can handle life without any medication what so ever and actually, truely be happy.
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)
I do wish things could have gone differently, but I make the best of it and be greatful for what I have.
And even though all this has happened to me, it brought me to him. It’s amazing how God can take the most awful of situations, and turn them into something so incredible.
I am a daughter of the King, and I am absolutely beautiful.
This was hard for me to write, but I hope there’s a girl out there that will hear this and know that with God, you are a new creation. He keeps no records of your wrongs and he always loves you, no matter what you’ve done or what you think of yourself.
God bless all of you girls.
You are beautiful just the way you are.