Ask Aysha: “I’m 17 and Don’t Want to Date! Is That Weird?”
Written by Aysha Ives | March 1, 2013
I’m 17 years old BUT I’m not interested in dating yet. I think guys are attractive, but I’m not interested in getting involved in relationships. I just want to focus on God. Is that weird?
Choosing to abstain from dating until you’re ready isn’t weird AT ALL. Actually, it’s quite wise. Although dating can be a wonderful experience with the right person, it can also lead to a lot of unnecessary heartbreak if you become involved with the wrong person. I commend you for waiting until God sends the right person into your life before you enter into a relationship!
Here are a few things to ponder during this season in your life:
- Not everyone gets married. Matthew 19:10-12 says this:
Jesus’ disciples then said to Him, ‘If this is the case, it is better not to marry!’ ‘Not everyone can accept this statement,’ Jesus said. ‘Only those whom God helps. Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.’
You may decide that you don’t want to get married, and that’s okay! You can still have guy friends, but perhaps you’re called to remain single and not to date or court. Keep in mind that few people achieve this, so it’s okay if you decide later in life that you DO want to be married. However, there’s nothing wrong if you decide to just have guy friends for now.
- Focus on God. Without the distraction of relationships, you can spend more time hearing from God. It’s much easier to stay focused when you don’t have a boyfriend competing for your attention.
- Develop your gifts and abilities. This is a great time to focus on developing your natural abilities and God-given gifts. Whether you choose not to date right now or you’re currently not dating for whatever reason, spend some time working on YOU. Use your time to groom the gifts God has given you so He can begin to use you more!
- Remember that you’re unique. God made everyone different and that adds to what makes you specical. Your strengths may be someone else’s weaknesses and vice-versa. So be sure to use positive self talk when you begin to think that something might be “wrong” with you. Embrace the fact that right now you’re focusing more on God and less on relationships. If and when the time comes for you to be in a relationship, then God will communicate that to you! Meanwhile, embrace your relationship with GOD!
We all have our individual races to run in this physical realm, and God will equip you and strengthen you in whatever way you need. Remain faithful and allow Him to use you however He sees fit. If a relationship is what He has in store for you, it’ll happen. And if not, He’ll give you the desire to remain single. Either way, you’re God’s daughter and He loves you!
Girls, what do you think? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
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