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Love

Just Can’t Get a Guy Off Your Heart and Mind?

Okay, so you have a crush on a guy! Maybe you’ve known him for a while or you just met him. Either way, you really like him. But for whatever reason, you wish you didn’t like him. Maybe he’s not a Christian, is a bad influence, hangs out with the wrong crowd, isn’t interested in being more than friends or just isn’t someone you see yourself marrying. So now what?

It’s not easy getting a guy out of your heart once you’ve let him in, right? But sometimes the heart and the mind just don’t work together. Emotions take over, the mind runs rampant and it’s as if you’ve completely lost control of yourself. But ladies, don’t give up. There is a way out of the madness!

The truth is, once you realize that there is a guy for you—and that this guy isn’t him—then you really can get him off your mind and out of your heart. Consider the following to help you!

  1. Focus on your future spouse. You may not know exactly who he is, but you know who he’s not. Once you remind yourself of the kind of guy you do want to spend your life with, then you will recognize that anyone else is just in the way of you finding him.
  2. Place God at the forefront of your life. When you put God first, it puts your life in perspective and you’re reminded that no guy should be elevated above God. It also helps you realize that your life is God’s and He will put the right guy in your life at the right time.
  3. Read your Bible. Everything you need to know about how to live your life is found in the Good Book. Not kidding! So, rather than spending your spare moments—and those in between—pining over this guy, refocus your attention to your life as a whole. When you read your Bible and understand what God expects of you, then you’ll be easily excited about your life, what’s ahead and that you’ll be sharing it with the right guy.
  4. Pray for strength, because as you know, you can overcome anything with the strength of God, including that crazy emotion that’s associated with a crush and confused with love. Scripture reminds us that there is no temptation that we cannot overcome if God is our strength. Never forget that!
  5. Pull yourself out of the world and remind yourself of the life you intend for yourself. This goes hand-in-hand with reading your Bible. As you know, many of those in the world have lost their way. They’re lost in culture and trends and fashion, all of which are dictated by the media. They’ve forgotten what God’s life for us is all about and have settled on this life and immediate gratification. In order to understand God’s plan for us, we must pull ourselves out of this world, which is where the “be in the world, not of it,” comes into play. Don’t get sucked in!
  6. Train your mind to divert its attention away from the guy. Every time he enters your mind, redirect your thought. Think instead about God’s plan for you.
  7. Don’t settle. Realize that when you give yourself to the wrong guy, you’re just giving yourself away. And you’re missing out on the right guy!

Ladies, don’t get me wrong—it’s not easy to turn your heart off and refocus your mind! But it can be done, especially when you focus on God’s plan for you. When the right guy comes along, you will know, because there will be no doubt. You’ll know. So be patient and trust in God.

Here’s a song to help you. It’s by Jamie Grace and it’s called “Just a Friend.” I already posted this once on PI, but for those of you who missed it, here it is again. God bless you all!

Ladies, are you trying to get a guy off your heart and mind? Share your story. We love to hear from you!

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78 Comments

  1. Project Inspired

    Posted by Shawn919 on September 8, 2017 at 07:38

    A very big problem occurred in my relationship 5 months ago between me and my girlfriend. So terrible she had to break up with me and later moved out of our home. I tried all possible means to get her back, but all to no avail and she made it clear she didn’t want me in her life anymore. Fast forward, months later i saw a post online about getting your love back using spell and i mailed the address {drphilipspelltemple@gmail.com}. His name was Dr Philip and he assured me that i will get my love back in 48hours. What an amazing statement!! I never believed, but was optimistic. On a sunny Tuesday, to my biggest surprise and i mean biggest, my GF called my cell phone saying she’d missed me all this time and wanted us to get back. So Amazing!! And that was how we got back and now we’re engaged.

  2. Project Inspired

    Posted by aolpassword on August 3, 2017 at 22:07

    I got the blessed privilege of getting to meet Jamie Grace 2 years ago! She came to my church camp on the last night there and put on a concert for the whole camp! Not to mention she was AWESOME, but it was such a blessing to meet her and get to have a convo and even get a picture! She was so genuine and nice! and at the time I was going through a really scary health issue that GOD has allowed to be one of my biggest testimonies! It was a real treasure getting to meet her and she sang this song too! She told us the story behind it and gave the audience some encouragement! 🙂

  3. BasicallyJustSarah

    Posted by BasicallyJustSarah on July 26, 2017 at 13:09

    I wish I didn’t like him, but I do, and it doesn’t help that the feelings are mutual. He’s the sweetest and most considerate guy I’ve met in every way, but he has one major downfall: I do not believe he considers himself a Christian. In fact, I do not believe he associates himself with any religion or faith. We work together and our coworkers have even caught onto the fact that we have feelings for each other and putting pressure on both of us to get together. I’ve really been struggling on what to do. We text constantly, although we have never hung out outside of work, and I love the conversations we have together. I don’t want to lead him on if I’m not quite willing to date him. He’s a spectacular human and he doesn’t deserve that, but on the other hand I really do want to build up the friendship we have so far.

    It would be so much simpler if we didn’t like each other, but we do, and I’m struggling with how to let him down, when I don’t even WANT to let him down. I know what the right thing to do is, but that doesn’t make it any easier. It helps a little that he’ll be leaving for college shortly and I’m almost hoping that he’ll get busy and this whole thing will just kind of fade, but then I’d be missing the opportunity to explain how important Christ is to me that I chose Jesus over him.

    Neither of us has made a move towards dating, but we have both shown that we care about each other. Should I just see how it goes once he leaves in a couple weeks, (maybe make my texts more and more sporadic?) or rip it off like a band aid while I still can? No matter what, I want his feelings and dignity to remain intact. Like I keep saying, he’s awesome! Kind, hardworking, and goes out of his way to help others without being asked. And while he’s obviously not perfect, his lack of faith is his biggest downfall. I could really use some encouragement and advice on how and what to say to him when.

  4. SpicePrincess

    Posted by SpicePrincess on June 30, 2017 at 06:38

    Mmmkay. So I’m currently in the weirdest romantically-related situation I’ve ever experienced. It’s not bad, it’s just weird. Sorry for such a long story, but I felt I should share (also I’m 23, both boys mentioned are 25).

    I have always had little crushes growing up, like most girls do in elementary and middle school, but when I got to high school in 2009, I began to build a standard of the type of man that I actually wanted. I wasn’t saved yet, but I knew I needed/wanted a Godly, holy ghost filled man and Adam Young (AKA Owl City) was my role model for this. A humble man following Christ, resisting worldly habits (drinking, smoking, partying, cussing), spreading the Word, encouraging and uplifting people with his gifts, praying over his projects and gifts so that they may reach people’s hearts, reading the Word everyday, practicing a Godly plan for dating and remaining abstinent, etc.
    Fast forward to around 2013, I am saved, graduated, now in college, I make a new friend online (calling him Micah) who is saved and I begin attending his church, meeting his family and we become great friends. We get sort of stuck in this “not quite dating but more than friends” limbo that we are still in to this day (due to complications with how dating in his church is and the fact that I can’t be a full-time member since I’m only in the neighborhood when I’m living in the school dorms). Micah is as close to my guidelines for a Godly man as I have ever seen, although he isn’t a close to the Lord as I would like. We’ve been (not quite dating, but definitely) best friends for 3 years now and this year it basically feels like we’ve been sort of drifting apart. I’ve prayed for Micah throughout all the time I’ve known him, and we’re compatible, but there is some important elements missing.
    So, in a weird and (seemingly) random turn of events, I ended up getting a crush on another guy. This is a guy(let’s call him Jo) that I only know from kids and artsy indie films, online accounts, and photos. A guy who lives miles and miles away and is somewhat of a celebrity in his own right. He has no idea I exist as of right now. On top of this, he is NOTHING I want mentally/spiritually/morally in a man. He smokes, he drinks, he cusses, he believes that “people can be good without having a concept of God” (which is true as a statement, but he believes it as a religion and that certainly ain’t helping his soul). He desires to help/encourage people with what he does and makes, but his art and characters are often dark themed and focused on the negatives in life (death, evil spirits, things dealing with the spirit of divination, etc).

    So, obviously, I don’t want to like Jo. Thankfully, I’ve always been gifted with the ability to lose feelings for any boy who I start to like, but doesn’t measure up to my moral and God-based standards. It doesn’t matter how cute, nice, funny, or attractive the boy may be, if he doesn’t measure up to my morals and the sort of man I know God wants for me, I don’t continue any romantic feelings for him. It’s always been that way for me, and I thank God so much for it because it’s saved me so much heartache and trouble. And, when it comes to celebrity crushes (even small “D-list” celebrities like Jo), there is always a wall of “it’s just a pipedream fantasy!” that keeps me from really falling for the guy anyway.

    However….. this summer has been a totally different story. Some of the more kid-friendly media Jo was in I have seen, but that was years ago and I had forgotten he even existed. I had never cared much for him and he was never anything special to me, but about 5 or 6 weeks ago, he would randomly haunt my mind. I tried hard to push out the thoughts, to not think about him, but he would always come back. Nothing lustful or worldly, just thoughts about who he is and what he’s like and how similar and different we are and things of that nature. Anyway, so, I resisted thinking about Jo for a solid 2 weeks or so, until I realized he had SOMEHOW weaseled his way into my heart. Which, for ME is unheard of. No man on God’s green earth has ever managed to so easily enter into my heartspace and ESPECIALLY not one who so vehemently goes against most of my morals and is so worldly.
    Immediately, I was troubled about this, and prayed for God to take the feelings away for about a week.. but they didn’t go away. Eventually, the thought crossed my mind, “Pray for JO.” My mom always says when someone is on her mind, she immediately starts praying for them, so I did just that. I started praying for him. I don’t want to try and “fix” him, especially on my own (plus he’s too far away :P), but I wanted to practice intercessory prayer for Jo. I began asking God to give Jo a circumcised heart of flesh and the ability to listen and understand God’s word and who God is. I began asking for God to protect him from malicious spirits (especially in the business he is in) and bind up whatever is blinding him from the truth. I rebuke any spirit that tries to prevent Jo from learning about the Lord.

    It felt like Jo was actually put in my heart and mind by the Lord. Now, I continued praying for myself and asking God to immediately take any deceptions and blinders away from my eyes if there are any in this situation. I began to ask God to give me the ability to discern my emotions from His voice. I don’t want to be tricked by the enemy or just my own feelings while drowning out God’s guidance.
    I’ve been praying for Jo for about a month’s time now and regardless of my feelings, I am thankful for what God has been doing. I’ve been praying and talking to God every night (in general as well as about Jo and myself) and I’ve actually never prayed this much (chronologically, this much for someone, or this much about a guy) before in my life. Not to mention, it’s been a tool to help me to overcome a sinful habit I’ve had for most of my life (one which Micah was actually making worse, which is an amazing testimony in itself). So far, I still have romantic feelings for Jo and I do have faith that it’s for good reason (even if it’s the not romantic reasons I would like :P).

    Honestly, I believe that God did put Jo on my heart and that I am supposed to be praying for him. I am a person with very little patience and my faith and trust aren’t nearly as strong as they should be. Because of this, I believe that this could be God’s way of building my faith and trust in Him, because I literally cannot do anything in this situation besides pray, have faith in God and what I pray for, wait on Him, read the Word, and just let God work.
    I can see Jo reaching for the truth (he’s said he has looked into Buddhism and other religions before) and I choose to have faith that God will answer my prayer and come to Jo and overwhelm him with His love and show Jo just how much He loves him. Of course, it’s up to Jo to make the right choice, but I pray he has the courage and the fighting chance to do so. I have faith that one day I am going to see Jo’s testimony. God knows I desire to be with Jo romantically, I feel our personalities would mesh well, and the guy feels reachable, BUT I also don’t want a man who doesn’t live for and love Jesus. I know God knows this and won’t put me with Jo if Jo doesn’t get saved or just isn’t for me. I choose to lean on the Lord and not my own understanding. I will not try to figure out the situation or my feelings, and just keep on praying for Jo and keep my faith in that God is going to work with him and work it all out. I’m not waiting on Jo to be fixed, I’m waiting to see what the Lord will do.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by aolpassword on August 3, 2017 at 21:59

      I really enjoyed reading this. thank you for sharing your heart. I will be praying for you as well as
      Jo’s life and salvation in the Lord. I admire your Spirit and heart for God, you have a gift or talent of encouragement and inspiration. reading this was a blessing. thank you.

  5. Project Inspired

    Posted by 13browna24 on February 25, 2017 at 22:08

    Love this, thank you, going through this for the first time in my life, I have never dated and these emotions/feelings just came out of nowhere and blind sided me. Very very encouraging, thanks a ton!

  6. Ria

    Posted by Ria on February 1, 2017 at 06:54

    I lived in Fiji for almost 4 months. On my last 2 weeks, I met this guy and he liked me and I liked him back. I went back home to my own country and we were okay for a month or 3 until conversations became less frequent. Now, I havent heard from him for a month and I’m so worried :'(

  7. sierrarey216

    Posted by sierrarey216 on January 23, 2017 at 20:55

    Now for my second story. My best friend is my ex-crush. I can never keep him out of my mind. He’s the one who matters most to me out of everyone in the school. The thing is, he always hangs out with this other girl who hates me and told him to block me on Instagram. I didn’t even know he had Instagram until he told me she did that. She also told my friends to block me. She likes him, everyone can tell, even him. That’s why she’s doing this. I’ve tried to talk to him about it but he won’t. He knows I’m kinda jealous. He knows I hate her too. She’s just mad I’m his best friend and not her. I actually made up this saying, “Roses are red, violets are blue, his best friend is me, and not you. And if you dare to try to take my place, your a** will be in space” haha I know it’s kinda mean but I’m territorial. I’m literally the only person who’s been with him through a whole bunch of crap with his ex girlfriend and his dark times where he hated everything and we’re still here together so yeah. She just now decides to try to get rid of me but she won’t. Sorry this is long, I just needed to rant and vent XD thanks for listening if you made it this far lol

  8. sierrarey216

    Posted by sierrarey216 on January 23, 2017 at 20:50

    So I have two stories. Each will be different comments lol. So the first story is the reason I came to this site. There’s this guy who’s in a grade above me who just moved here and he’s hot. He’s got bright blue eyes, freckles, messy dark hair, and my friend saw his abs when his shirt lifted up while taking his sweatshirt off. The thing is, I’m super duper shy and I don’t know if I can flirt with him. I’m gonna try with my two friends who are huge flirts but have boyfriends so they’re gonna help me.

  9. Project Inspired

    Posted by ashyyydavis on June 25, 2016 at 20:39

    I am so grateful for this article right now. I really needed it.

  10. Project Inspired

    Posted by tgallegos1 on December 15, 2015 at 20:31

    So, this past year my sister invited her friend(who is a guy) to live with us. I started having a crush on him about a month into him living with us. He’s not a Christian, he smokes, and he has an alcohol issue. Another thing is, he’s gay. I knew all these things about him and for some reason I fell for him. Everything is hard to explain, I don’t know why I fell for him. I was in love with him. I’m starting to get over it because of recent events, but it is so incredibly hard. I’m having trouble with depression because of this whole situation. I was VERY glad to see this post. It gave me some hope of getting over him. I know he’s not good for me and that it will never happen because of his sexual orientation. Getting over him is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but this post meant a lot to me. The song was perfect, too. I’ve already downloaded it and is on my music list.

  11. Volleyball4life

    Posted by Volleyball4life on December 13, 2015 at 12:58

    Okay, so I met this guy at camp this summer, and we have been snap-chatting a lot. He loves The Lord, and understands some of the things I go through. Last night, he told me he likes me. I know it isn’t right to lead a guy on if you aren’t really interested in him, but I feel special ‘having a boyfriend’. The thing is, he is the first Godly guy that has asked me out, and that is rare, living in a small town. I just told him I liked him too, but examining my heart, I don’t think I ‘like’ him, but I like the thought of being in a relationship. What should I do?

  12. Rachel_Kil

    Posted by Rachel_Kil on December 13, 2015 at 10:05

    Absolutely perfect timing. Thank you!

  13. Project Inspired

    Posted by pandabear on July 13, 2015 at 21:44

    So, I really like this guy and I don’t usually have crushes like this because usually when I have a crush I can get over it after a while. I’m 20 and I’ve never dated because it was never a priority of mine and I didn’t understand the concept of “dating for fun” or “dating just for the sake of being in a relationship”. But this time, its different. I’ve only met him this past year he’s a Christian and I can tell he really has a lot of love for God and a relationship with God. He’s a really good guy, we’ve kind of become friends over these past couple of months but we only talk during school and i’m okay with being just friends with him but a part of me would like to be in a relationship with him mainly because I’ve never met guy like him and he genuinely cares about others and is passionate about Christ and we share ALOT of the same interests which is something that I look for in a guy. And it’s because of him that I been able to “find my way” back to my faith after feeling “lost” from God these past couple of years. It’s because of him that I turned to God for help during difficult times this past year and now because of him I see God so much more than I ever have in my life. But the problem is that he’s a couple of years older than me (well like 2 years) and I don’t want him thinking that I’m too young for him or want to come off as “clingy.” Sometimes I feel like he may like me back, but I can’t tell if he does or if he’s just being a nice guy. I can see myself with him in the future but right now it seems like he might only see me as a friend, and I may be kinda old fashioned but I kinda want him to pursue me first cause right now talking to him first all the time makes me feel like i’m bothering him, but if I don’t talk to him i’m scared he’ll just move on and forget about me (if there is a possibility that he likes me back). I know should let God handle this but i’m scared and worried of the possible “heartache” from him not liking me back especially because he has had such a impact on me and feel like I can’t just let him go because of that. But at the same time I feel like i’m just setting myself up for that possible “heartache.”

  14. Project Inspired

    Posted by InkyCake on July 11, 2015 at 03:41

    Jamie Grace!!!!!!!!!

    I mean, really good article.

    Jamie Grace!!!!!

    I just went through a stage and this song perfectly described it.

  15. Project Inspired

    Posted by alianoelb on July 4, 2015 at 22:28

    Hey. So I really like this guy at my school. He is a Christian, smart, responsible, genuine, kind, anything you could want in a guy. A part of me wants to believe there is a chance in the future or something but deep down I doubt it. I technically haven’t told him how I feel but I don’t want to screw anything up. We are friends now and I don’t want to scare him away or anything. He is a grade younger than me but we are close in age. I have tried praying, reading my bible, not thinking about him, just about everything but I can’t stop wanting to talk about him and be with him. I don’t think I have ever felt quite this way about a boy. Honestly it kinda sucks. Any advice at all would be so helpful and appreciated. Thanks.

    • emi__rose23

      Posted by emi__rose23 on February 1, 2016 at 18:40

      This is honestly the same exact situation I am in, and some days I feel so depressed about our platonic relationship that it makes me want to cry. But I have been learning to channel those emotions into something positive. I have learned that being the best friend I can be to him and giving love without expectation helps soothe my heart. Maybe one day he will see me as something more, but for now it is best to trust the Lord’s plan for our future.

  16. Project Inspired

    Posted by bethany1417 on March 19, 2015 at 21:36

    OK well I have this amazing Christian guy in my life loves the Lord and strives to follow His plan as well as I strive for following Christ’s will too (we are going to call him C). The thing is C seems to think that I am the one, but I’m not so sure if the feelings mutual. He’s great and he has a lot of qualities of what I am looking for in my future husband, but I just don’t think I am ready to be serious with him, or any guy for that matter, and by serious I mean girlfriend and boyfriend because to me that is serious to a certain extent. On top of this there is another amazing guy (we are going to call him G) who I also happen to have feelings for and G pretty amazing as well and has some of the qualities I am looking for too. I am not in a relationship with either of them it’s just a friendship with possible feeling attached on each side. I don’t know what to do and I’ve been praying about it but I just don’t know. C and I are closer to being in a relationship then G and I and C’s family loves me and I don’t want to disappoint them as well as possibly hurt C’s feelings. Pleas any advice would be great, because I have no clue what to do!

    • ritrappersofhcc

      Posted by ritrappersofhcc on July 4, 2015 at 20:17

      Pray, girl. Pray, pray, pray, pray, pray, pray!! Pray about each of the guys and where God sees them in your future. But other than that, I would focus mainly on making that friendship with both guys as strong as possible before you develop stronger feelings for either guy. If you think your relationship with each guy is pretty strong, then I would make a list of the pros and cons of dating (or courting, if that’s what you want to do) each guy. (Before you make the list, pray that God shows you something about each guy that makes him stand out from everyone else.) After making the list, I would take the guys and their feelings out of account for just a few moments while you review how YOU really feel about them. (If you’re anything like me, my feelings for people, guys specifically tend to be swayed by how they view me.) Don’t let their feelings for you sway you one way or another. And don’t get together with your guy, C, just because you don’t want to hurt his feelings. In the end it’s just going to hurt both you and him even more than if you just say he’s not the one for you right now. And if you disappoint his parents because you’re following God’s plan for you, then that’s their problem, not yours. I hope this has been of help for ya. Let me know if you need anymore advice!!

  17. kmjefferson

    Posted by kmjefferson on March 10, 2015 at 15:30

    I have the biggest crush on my best friend of six years. As of now, we are both freshmen in college. I really want him to ask me out but I don’t know if he ever will. I would like to bring up dating to him but I’m afraid of doing so. I don’t know how he would react.

    • Musician4Life

      Posted by Musician4Life on April 13, 2015 at 09:50

      Out of experience, I would suggest telling him how you feel. I’ve been in love with my best friend for well over a year now and I didn’t tell him until a few months ago. Sadly, I waited too long and he told me even though he used to have a crush on me, he moved on because he didn’t think I liked him all that much. So because we were both too afraid to bring up the touchy subject, we missed out on what could have been an awesome relationship. Since then, I’ve made it a point that if I care about someone, I tell them no matter what could happen because anything could come from that one conversation, and after all I believe everyone deserves to know when they are loved. Hope this helps!

  18. brittney_heart

    Posted by brittney_heart on February 8, 2015 at 21:14

    I love this, and that song you tagged by Jamie Grace is awesome, i love that there is a song out there for us girls thats not just talking about “Ohh ya i like you, but you dont like me and i want this and blah blah”

  19. tomboy_loves_Tigers

    Posted by tomboy_loves_Tigers on January 29, 2015 at 16:33

    I am trying to get a guy off of my heart and mind for sure. I met him freshman year and instantly liked him as more than a friend. I forced myself to repress my feelings because I knew he liked my friend and so I never ended up telling him I liked him, but the feelings never went away. I’m a senior now, and since high school began, he has had a crush on or dated every single one of my friends in our friend group…except me. I finally am at the point where if I don’t tell him my feelings, I think I’ll explode. But deep down, I know he only likes me as a friend. And I don’t know why he doesn’t like me. And I keep thinking that if he gave me just one chance, went on one date with me, then he’d see how much we have in common and how years of being just friends proves that we work well together. Ultimately, I want to ask him to prom, and I want to tell him my feelings for him. I want him to say yes to prom and give me a chance, but at the same time, I’m scared I’ll send him running for the hills. Does anyone have any advice? What should I do? Please help!

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by bethany1417 on March 19, 2015 at 21:49

      Hi um I’m only 16 so I don’t know if my advice will be super beneficial to you, or if your even going through this crush on your good friend thing still, but what I would say is pay closer attention to how he acts around you. Some guys are really stupid and will use the girl’s they like friends to make her jealous. See if it’s different in a friend way or maybe more romantically possibly crush kind of way, I am not an expert though. Also, while you pay attention pray about it. You never know who God might have in store for you and if it isn’t this guy, then well, he is going to be even more amazing then you ever imagined. 🙂 I hope everything goes well, I am kind of in your same situation except I haven’t been repressing my feelings for that long. I just met him this basketball season, and he hasn’t dated any of my friends, but in a sense I relate because I have been in this situation once before now. I hope everything I said wasn’t too confusing! May God bless you and keep you, may His light shine upon you, and give you peace.

  20. Project Inspired

    Posted by Nene on January 18, 2015 at 22:52

    Okay, I have this issue. I have known this guy for two years. He’s a Christian and I know the people he hangs out with, they are not really bad people. I can see myself marrying him. I met Alex my 8th grade year closer to the beginning of the year. I was invited to try this church club called Awana every Tuesday. In 8th grade, I wore makeup because I’m so insecure. But at this club, I met him and thought he was cute, so I started to talk to him. Me being so shy, it was easy to talk to him, which was weird. I also started going to church every Sunday, not knowing he’d be there too. I found out he was a 7th grader, a grade below me. But I didn’t care. He’s literally 9 days older than me though. So when I found out he went to Marshall, it was just a coincidence that he was enrolled in band. And I in orchestra. But every morning, I would teasingly “kick” him. He then named it the morning kick. His last name is Poonoosamy, so I gave him the nick name, “Poo Poo”. He was okay with it though! About 3 months after we became friends (over text)-
    Me: So Alex, do you like anyone?
    Poo Poo: Yeah. Do you?
    Me: Yeah. Tell me who you like.
    Poo Poo: Only if you tell me.
    Me: Okay.
    Poo Poo: Kelly from Awana and ______ _________(some other name who I forgot.
    Me: Jayden from Awana, ____ ______(some other guy) and one more person who I cannot name.(I was referring to him)
    Awana ended around the time school did. At the last Awana meeting, he asked for my number so he could “prank call” me. Instead, it was so much more than that. He texted me all the time. And called me too. We would have the longest conversations. I even had a ringtone for him since he called me so often. And every Sunday, he would tell me how many times we have texted, the number getting bigger and bigger from 2,000. And then I went to Awana camp at the end of June. There I met a guy… Named Jonathan.. That liked me. And I liked him too. But not as much as Alex. After camp, I told Alex that I liked a kid named Jonathan but I never told Jonathan about Alex. 3 weeks before freshman year started for me, Alex was going on a family vacation before school started of his 8th grade year. I talked to Jonathan on the phone that day and texted Alex. I said, “How would you talk to a girl you like?” He said, “Casual.” I said “What if she knew you liked her?” He gave me the same answer. “What if she liked you and you liked her and you both knew it?” Once again, he said “Casual.” I said, “What if it was me?” And he said……… “Casual, like I’ve been doing this past year.” This was one of the greatest moments of my life. I played it off like I didn’t know what he meant. “What?” I asked. He said, “Read the last text I sent you again.” And I changed the topic. He said, “Sabrena, before I leave, I need to talk to you.” I said, “Okay.” Then a few days later, he called me, I said, “Hello, what’s up?” “Well I wanted to tell you something.” He said. I said, “Okay, what is it?” He said, “I like you.” And I was at the bridge of happiness, and I replied, “I like you too.” And he said, “I know.” “How?” I asked. He said, “When you couldn’t tell me the third guy you liked.” So, he knew all this time that I liked him. But I had no idea he knew! But he didn’t make it awkward, he made an effort to get closer to me, causing him to like me. Then, freshman year started. Apparently he told one of his friends that he liked me and it got around to a lot of 8th graders. Then, he started to act different in March. I said in text “Do you still like me..?” He said, “No.” I said, “When did you stop…” He said, “Maybe 3 months ago….” And I was pretty sad. So I stopped texting him. I told my friend, Karina (she’s had the same math class with him since 6th grade), that he stopped liking me. She told me she already knew though. I said, “How do you know?” She said, “He told me.” I said, “Why didn’t you tell me?” She said, “Because I thought he already told you.” I asked him and said, “Why did you tell Karina you stopped liking me but not me?” He said, “Because I thought she was going to tell you..” I asked, “Why do you not like me anymore..?” He said, “Because I don’t see you 6 days a week anymore.” I found out he stopped liking me, on my own, 3 MONTHS LATER. That hurt. So he thought Karina was going to tell me but Karina thought he already told me. So I discovered the truth. So I told him, “Oh, well I don’t like you anymore either.” Half of last year, I convinced myself that I stopped liking him. But I was lying to myself. This year, I asked Alex if he was going to homecoming and he said no. But later on the day before homecoming, I found out that he was forced to ask Karina. I got kind of jealous. I brought Jonathan to homecoming. When I saw Alex, in line, I fell apart. I knew I didn’t want Jonathan to be there with me, I wanted to be there with Alex. And that’s when I realized, I’m in love with him. And it’s impossible to get over him. I tell my mom EVERYTHING. (LITERALLY) So I told her I fell apart and she said you need to give up, distance yourself from him, get over him. So I started ignoring him, but on the day of the first rehearsal on Saturday for marching bang, I didn’t keep my space. At the Awana missionary conference, he compared our feet. His are a lot bigger than mine, so he started calling me small feet. So I went back to flirting with him. On the day of the last football game, I called him after school. It took me a while to say, but I said, “I think it’s pretty obvious that I still have feelings for you, so I wanted to know if you feel the same…” And he said, “Uh…. Yeah, no..” And I said, “Okay, that’s all I wanted to know. Bye.” I hung up really quickly. And that’s when life and heartbreak hit me. Everyone tells me to get over him, but I can’t. I cry, thinking about him. Thinking about our history. Thinking about everything he used to do. He was so amazing, and I can’t get over him. So I’m not going to. I’m going to wait, see if he will ever come back to me. I told him that I will tell him something on the last day of school of his senior year; “I love you.” I’ve never felt this way about anyone. I don’t want to lose Alex. I really want him to be mine. But it’s never going to happen. He’ll never feel the same about him. I’m just going to be a girl he liked for a year. I miss everything we had. I miss him. I was happy. Now I need to make an effort to get him to talk to me. He doesn’t even text me anymore. The last time he texted me was at the Australian thing for marching band. That was the first time he texted me in such a long time.. I miss him. I want everything to do with him. I want to have a high school relationship. I want it to last.. But I know that I will never get that.. I’m jealous of all these relationships. I’ll admit, I’m so jealous of this one girl who gets what she wants. NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS FOR ME. And that’s why I just cry. My life is so different from others. There is only one person I truly care about at school, in the world (other than family) and it’s Alex. It always will be him. There is no way to stop loving him. I’ll just eventually learn to live without him. It’s so hard. I want him. All I want is him. He’s my thoughts 24/7. I feel like maybe I’m supposed to be miserable. And have no one. Just learn to live alone for the rest of my life. I know I am supposed to focus on God more, but I honestly cannot. I’ve tried. I swear it’s true.. My mom says he honestly still cares about me, more than others. My mom has high hope for us in the future, but I keep telling her that we aren’t going to be in contact any more. I told him he’ll forget about me when I graduate a year before him. I’m going to lose him. I know, I pray to God, asking what to do. And I still don’t know. All I know is I love him and God knows it too. I believe God has a plan for me, and that Alex was or is a part of it. But it’s hard to wait… I need help, and would like it if you prayed for me. Please. Thank you for taking your time to read this.

    • Broadwaybabe

      Posted by Broadwaybabe on January 19, 2015 at 08:13

      Girl I’ve read your story and my heart goes out to you! I completley understand your pain and I know how horrible it is. I’m going to be a college freshman in the fall and I’ve never dated…but I’ve gotten my heart broken a few times. Sadly, to get over Alex, it will take a LONG time. You might not even ever completely get over him. The memories will always come back and the tears will creep in when you least expect them. But I can assure you, it will get easier. One way is to cut Alex out completley. No more txting or talking. It’s pretty clear that he’s a little immature if he just stopped liking you just because he doesn’t see you everyday. He needs some time to grow up. So don’t share your heart anymore with a guy like that. He played with your heart and moved on. You deserve so much more than that! Here’s my advice…fix your eyes on the Lord. He created you and knows your heart. The closer you get to God(your maker), the less important Alex will become. Your heart will change and you’ll focus on more important things! It’s very difficult though! The way I feel better is thinking about my husband. Thinking about our wedding day and how God put that man into my life because we fit perfectly together. It fills me with hope! Try it! Picture everything! And keep praying! I will pray for God to heal your precious heart. He loves you and cares so much!!

  21. Project Inspired

    Posted by clwilbanks on January 12, 2015 at 21:45

    I have this problem. Only this guy is in church. He seems to fit all my wants in a husband. He is in leadership. He is a great role model. I’ve seen him step up when no one else would. He is awesome. I have known him for years and have liked him for years. I don’t think I am good enough for him so I have never made a move to even see if he could like me. When people talk about him around me, I can’t stop the fluttering in my heart. Everyone I know admires him and thinks he is a great Christian man. But I can’t stop thinking about him. I have prayed to stop, to forget him, and be happy in my singleness but nothing is happening. I love being single. I know God has a purpose in my being single, but I can’t stop the feelings and thoughts I have about him. Does anyone have any advice?

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by bethany1417 on March 19, 2015 at 22:07

      Ok so I actually completely relate to this. I know how it feels when you don’t think your good enough for the guy who’s so awesome and you just happen to be crazy about as well and the truth is it sucks. The thing though is that you are more amazing then you give yourself credit for, sure we aren’t perfect but God did make you in His image and He loves you more then you can imagine. IN the Bible in Psalms 139:14 “I praise You because I AM FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made, Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” That verse states that you are fearfully and wonderfully mad and that God has a plan for you. Maybe it will be dating tis awesome Christian guy eventually or yeah maybe the only lover you’ll have is the Lover of your soul, Jesus, and I think you have got a great head on your shoulder as well as a great God working in your heart. Don’t doubt your worth! Maybe show a little interest if you want and just see where it goes, and no I do not mean be extremely flirtatious just show some interest and then see where God takes you! 🙂 God bless!!

  22. freezeon98

    Posted by freezeon98 on January 10, 2015 at 09:25

    My ex-boyfriend and I broke up a little less than two weeks ago. We’d been dating for about five months, and I was/still am convinced that he could have been the one. He had everything I was looking for in a guy and so much more. He’s kind, incredibly smart, and is a spiritual leader (he’s a minister and preaches). He broke up with me because in August he’s going to college down in Nashville and he doesn’t think I’ll be happy as he’ll be pretty much gone for two years. We’ve had this conversation before, and I thought we were going to try to make it work, but then he said he’d been thinking about it and changed his mind.

    I’ve been really struggling with it, because I still love him, and I miss him so much. I keep praying about this and praying for his happiness and health. It’s so hard to move on, though. I haven’t been in contact with him since we broke up (I had to change my number and haven’t had the courage to text him), but I want to so badly.

    I don’t want to move on. I’m so afraid because I feel as though I’ll never meet somebody better than him. I feel as though he’s perfect for me, but I know that if he was then it would have worked out.

    The Bible tells us (somewhere in James chapter 1, I believe) that every perfect gift is given to us from God. So every hardship that we go through, God will turn into the perfect gift. I think a perfect example is my parents divorce. It was hard, but if it hadn’t have happened, I wouldn’t have my sister or my stepdad, whom I think of as a father.

    I guess I’m just struggling to move on. I know God has someone perfect for me out there, but it’s so hard to believe at this moment. Nevertheless, I guess I will just continue to pray about it.

  23. Project Inspired

    Posted by CrazyWriter94 on November 13, 2014 at 18:36

    Okay, so my problem is that I’ve been doing everything on this list for years. (I’ll admit to slipping on the Bible reading sometimes, but I’m working on it.) But my feelings never fade. The problem isn’t that I don’t think he could be the right guy. The problem is that this guy seems to fit all my criteria for “the One” thus far, and more. He’s kind, smart, is a great spiritual leader (I’ve observed this leadership multiple times), reins me in when I’m too hyper, shares some (though not all) of my interests, is honestly seeking God’s will for his life, and I’ve always felt comfortable with him. He’s one of those guys who almost all of the girls have a crush on. When we moved to a new church, he was the only person my age who consistently made an effort to talk to me, and we kept that up for years, though we don’t talk as much anymore (and currently he’s in another state). He’s my friend. Problem is, either he isn’t interested, or he’s chosen not to show it (which, knowing him, might be something he’d do as a way of being cautious; he doesn’t even like to e-mail back and forth with eligible girls unless it’s necessary). Most of the time, I’m okay. I can move on with my life, and I would honestly be all right and be happy for him if he found someone else, though it might hurt a little. But then whenever people talk about him, all the emotions and such come flooding back. I’m really proud of him, and I wish him the best no matter what, but I don’t like being this /gone/ on a guy who might not like me back. It makes me feel bad sometimes because I feel like I should be able to make the feelings go away. But I’ve been reading, praying, distracting myself, etc. for years, and nothing has faded. If anything, it’s gotten stronger. I could honestly see myself spending the rest of my life with him, but I try not to imagine it, because I know it will only make things worse.
    Sorry for rambling, but… Suggestions? I don’t know what do do anymore. I’m twenty years old, but I feel like a fourteen-year-old with a bad crush. 😛

    • Jessie Aaron

      Posted by Jessie Aaron on December 21, 2014 at 21:36

      Oh my goodness! Your situation lines up EXACTLY with mine. For me it’s been going on for 5 years. I’ve tried everything, even talking to adults that I trust and nothing works! I don’t have any suggestions (mainly because I’m still seeking answers myself) but I just want to tell you that you’re not alone!

      I will say one thing, however. In the midst of all of these emotions, there is one thing that God has revealed to me constantly. Numerous times I feel like just giving up because I’m so tired of the emotions and I want to know if this guy and I are suppose to be together or not, and each time God lays upon my heart to simply rest. Rest in His sovereignty (He is in control of these situations); rest in His love (He understands the emotions and carries them alongside us); rest in His peace (He readily supplies it. Even in simple ways like a beautiful sunset that redirects our attention to our Creator).

      I will be praying for you, sister. Answers will come! Peace will come! Jesus is able 🙂

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by CrazyWriter94 on November 13, 2014 at 18:42

      It doesn’t help that our families get along really well and interact a lot, and that everyone close to me thinks we’d be really good together. Doesn’t do much to distract me. xP

  24. jcsalmons19

    Posted by jcsalmons19 on November 10, 2014 at 22:29

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! I so needed this! I’ve had a crush on this guy “Patrick” for my whole life. We’ve grown up in the same church so he was in every one of my Sunday school classes, VBS classes, and my youth group. He’s a Christain, comes from a GREAT family, and is a year older than me. My parents love him and used to think that he would make a good catch for me. Patrick recently started hanging out with a guy in my grade that I’m pretty sure does drugs and other guys that are heavy partiers. One of my friends that parties (please pray for her) was talking about how she has seen Patrick drinking and smoking weed at a party before. My friend has no reason to lie to me, so I don’t kow what to believe. The Patrick I know would never do any of that, but with the influence of his new friends, I can see him falling to peer pressure. My family said the same thing. He’s always been a follower. Because of all of that, I don’t want to like him anymore, but every time I see him, I like him all over again. Since he graduated this spring, he was “politely kicked out” of our youth group because technically, he’s a college student. If y’all have any advice, please reply or comment back. I could really use some help with this. God bless!

  25. realmisslq

    Posted by realmisslq on October 28, 2014 at 22:36

    Jamie Grace is the BEST!!! <3 <3 <3 I have BOTH of her albums! :p

    Nice article, by the way! VERY inspirational! 🙂

  26. Project Inspired

    Posted by JesusFreak3278 on October 4, 2014 at 17:45

    Awesome song!! It was one of those songs where I felt like I wrote the lyrics myself, they are so true to me. Lol!

  27. PrettyMonkey55

    Posted by PrettyMonkey55 on October 2, 2014 at 19:31

    I really liked this, thank you!:) I wish I had seen this when i was in the midst of it. But, now I am more eager to use these tips. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 😀

  28. HorseyHan

    Posted by HorseyHan on August 23, 2014 at 11:30

    This is so helpful!! Thank you so much! I had a man lead me on for over a year to believe he was truly interested in me. Everything was perfect, my parents loved him, I loved him (prematurely of course), and he was pursuing me. After a year and a half of this, everything just stopped. He stopped talking to me, coming over to my house…everything. I thought I had done something wrong. About a week later it was announced that he had begun dating one of my friends. I was completely crushed, but I thank God that it happened; because he was obviously not the man I thought he was. I still pray for them, but it’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I truly loved him, and I let my thoughts and my emotions take over my brain and my heart, and it has caused me a world of hurt! It has been a constant battle for me to keep my thoughts off of them and not be jealous of the girl who is now dating him. It’s unbelievably hard, but I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. 😀

  29. Leah518

    Posted by Leah518 on August 11, 2014 at 13:13

    Thank you so much for sharing!! That came at just the right time in my life!!!

  30. sha566

    Posted by sha566 on August 8, 2014 at 08:52

    That’s such a good song, I love it!

  31. Project Inspired

    Posted by DeepBeauty on August 1, 2014 at 14:59

    God is so amazing! He is changing my focus right now. Not because the guy that I keep thinking about is the wrong guy necessarily, but because I am too young to be worrying about a spouse. I am glad He showed me this article, it showed me some things I am doing right and some things that I can still do to make sure that my heart is focused on God’s amazing plan for my life right now!

    • kass4god

      Posted by kass4god on August 12, 2014 at 23:09

      I am feeling the same way! I met this guy, and I have only known him for a short time, but I really feel like he might be right, but I am too young to be thinking about that, and I need to keep my focus on God.

  32. brennaeskyler2

    Posted by brennaeskyler2 on July 28, 2014 at 19:08

    Wow, I love Jamie’s song! She totally has the same feelings about guys! That song is so awesome! Its sometimes hard to wait for the right guy, but God has it under control! 🙂

  33. Project Inspired

    Posted by leahh_116 on July 27, 2014 at 14:38

    There is this guy that just broke up with me. He was my first boyfriend, and he was a man of God. A true man of God. The thing I look for in a guy right now is if he loves Jesus as much as I do. Any of my friends would agree. It’s just hard because I can’t get my mind off of him because of how much he loved Jesus.

  34. kellybarta14

    Posted by kellybarta14 on July 26, 2014 at 20:30

    This article is so cool! I can relate. There are two guys. I wouldn’t say I have exalted them above God, but I think about them a lot. Sometimes I start to slip a bit and can’t get them off my mind. But I cant control it…

  35. his98child

    Posted by his98child on July 26, 2014 at 11:25

    I needed this today. Thank you.

  36. princessa. madds143

    Posted by princessa. madds143 on July 25, 2014 at 12:59

    I’ve been needing this for, like, the past 3-4 years. the guy is my brother’s best friend, a year older than me, and a christian. his dad is also the pastor at my church. So here’s the dilemma. He’s toyed with my feelings ever since he found out i liked him, dated my (ex) best friend four times, and then flirted with me on and off for four months after that only to get another girlfriend that definitely wasn’t me. He acts like I’m some little kid that isn’t worth his time whenever his friends are around, but is a sweet gentleman whenever they’re not. After he broke up with his most recent girlfriend, he didn’t even have the decency to tell me even though we’re good friends and I’ve known him longer than almost anyone. Most recently, he was over at my house to sleep over this past weekend for my brother’s sixteenth birthday. He flirted with me for over two and a half hours that night only to look down at his phone to text another girl (flirting might I add).
    I’m seriously done with all of his crap and I’m tired of being his second choice or for whenever he gets bored. I don’t deserve that and he knows it. It makes me sick at my stomach to think that I like him and I haven’t ever been able to get him off my mind or move on. Its like, I resolve to not let him walk all over me and then as soon as I see him, all of that goes down the drain in .2 seconds. I’m tired of this and I want anything and everything I have ever felt for him to be gone, wiped out, blown to smithereens, whatever you want to call it. HELP!!!!

    • 01banana

      Posted by 01banana on July 28, 2014 at 22:28

      Every time I think of the guy I’m not supposed to be thinking too much about, I say to myself that God has a plan for me and it doesn’t include him (the guy) at least for the time being. I say that every time I start thinking about him and the thing is that it is actually helping me. I wasn’t sure if it would help at first but over time I can see that it has made a big difference. I didn’t try to look for him at church or even feel disappointed when I don’t speak to him. Praying about it has also helped. I just open up everything that is on my heart to God and put it into his hands each day. I pray that you will get over this too because it really sucks to have a certain guy stuck on your mind when you’re trying to sort of “forget” him.

  37. dancining_in_my_tardis

    Posted by dancining_in_my_tardis on July 25, 2014 at 08:01

    I have had problems with this very thing. Right now I have been trying to get my crush off my mind all the time, and it isnt even that he is a “bad boy” or anything like that He seems to be a guy I would date I just know I shouldnt obsess over someone who isnt “mine” and I still need to grow closer to God. anyways has anyone else gone through this too?

  38. AbbyS

    Posted by AbbyS on July 25, 2014 at 07:46

    My best guy friend is like over and above any standards I have but he’s dating someone else. this helps soooo much! thank you 🙂

  39. pureheart14

    Posted by pureheart14 on July 24, 2014 at 23:07

    You have no idea how badly I needed this tonight! Thank you so much for writing this! I dated a guy last year who was 18 ( I am 16). We ended up dating for like ten months before he broke up with me a week before valentines and two weeks before my birthday.It was horrible! He said “we can be just friends” It really hurt and still does especially now that my best friend has a boyfriend.Tonight this article helped me in so many ways! Thank you!

  40. Bergc037469

    Posted by Bergc037469 on July 24, 2014 at 19:41

    This is fantastic article. I have been going through this and this really helps. 🙂

  41. May All Your Bacon Burn

    Posted by May All Your Bacon Burn on July 24, 2014 at 19:37

    What if he happens to be a rather nice fellow and follower of Christ? I have a friend who lately I’ve been starting to have other feelings for. I don’t even feel like I need to be different around him, like I often do around other folks. With a lot of guys, I feel awkward, and that I’m almost obligated to be calm and collected and…well, girl-like, but with him I have no problem chatting waywardly about anime and D&D and essentially anything under the sun that’s worth speaking about. But at the same time I’m not sure if I’m just getting closer to him as a friend or if it’s turning into that sort of relationship, or even if those feelings are returned, because I’m incredibly oblivious and no matter how hard I try I don’t know how it’s supposed to actually feel like (he’s also like that, though. My mum jokes that if we were ever to get together, it would take years for us to even realize we’re even in a relationship because we’re that oblivious). I’ve prayed about it, and every time I do I see more reasons to like him, but at the same time more people point out that it couldn’t possibly work (it’s a two-year age difference, but a fragile one, since I’m in college and he’s still in high school). Usually the Lord is pretty straight-up with me when it comes to this sort of thing, but I honestly have no clue what He’s telling me this time…

    • dancining_in_my_tardis

      Posted by dancining_in_my_tardis on July 25, 2014 at 08:04

      He sounds like a really good friend to you then! 😀 Maybe it isnt the right time for anything to happen in that way. I would just keep being friends and maybe once he is grown up a little more something will sprout and it will be obvious. keep praying and listen to God always! 🙂

  42. Project Inspired

    Posted by 116romans on July 24, 2014 at 18:35

    I actually went through something like this. I fell head over heels for someone I thought was and could continue to be my best friend. At first we were friends and would hang with groups of friends. We got to know each other and after awhile I wanted to get to him more. The more I got to know the more I started to see someone I wanted to be with. We tease each other and talk for hours sometimes. I decided not to tell him that I was starting to like him maybe that was my mistake though. I continued to talk to him more often. He started talking to me less after awhile. He started avoiding me and I asked hime why. Anyway he found that started I had started to like and he didn’t feel the same. He said that he didn’t want me to like him because he didn’t feel the same about me. He wanted to protect my heart and he didn’t want to lead me on. He was afraid that if he continued to close to me or even hang out with that it would be harder for me to get over him and move. He was right…sort of…. but it was not any easier or less painful. It was incredibly miserable. I felt like lost one of best friends. One of the most respectful and admirable people that I know was no longer able to be me around because he was afraid that I would never be able stop liking him and he could never be the same. When I see look at me it feels like that is all he sees in me now is someone he has to avoid in order that my heart is protected from continuing too feel a love that is not shared. Anyway I have moved on. At first I felt numb but I God has helped me through this and I am able to smile and learning to trust him better. You see, Paul writes he was able to be content in every situation through Christ. I am praying that God gives me strength no matter my situation. I want to be completely satisfied in Christ not because I think this how a meeting a person who you want to marry comes about, but because God is the ruler of the universe and Him only deserves my worship and praise. I don’t know if God has the one picked out for me or not and to be honest I am not sure it matters anyway. I am not guaranteed to get married someday. I am starting to be okay of either or. I want God to make into the person he wants me to be and not get in his way by worrying or not trusting Him. Come what may.

    • caramel_99

      Posted by caramel_99 on August 8, 2014 at 09:34

      Hey! Thank you so much for this! I’m actually going through something like that right now. And I was reading other PI articles and was thinking “blah, blah, blah”. I love PI, but after over 2 years of the same problem (As in “I’m fine, things are great….”Ohmygoodness I miss him so much…”) it’s hard to listen. For some reason your comment stood out to me, so I read it. I really like what you said. To make things even awesomer, your username is one of my favourite Bible verses. It’s one of the only verses that I have managed to remember over the years.

    • 01banana

      Posted by 01banana on July 28, 2014 at 22:32

      Girl, I know what you mean! I feel the same way with wanting to be satisfied in Christ whether or not I am single. I’m glad you commented this.

  43. Grass_Hunting

    Posted by Grass_Hunting on July 24, 2014 at 15:54

    This is a good article. But… what if he’s not a bad guy. What if he’s perfect for you and you’re perfect for him, there’s just… I don’t know, not really an interest on his part. I’m struggling with that right now.

    • 01banana

      Posted by 01banana on July 28, 2014 at 22:36

      Well, no one is exactly perfect for each other. It may seem that way but no one really is cause we’re all sinners. Maybe you should continue praying and wait. I’ll be keeping you in my prayers because I know what your feeling and it’s not fun. Stay strong!

      • Grass_Hunting

        Posted by Grass_Hunting on August 26, 2014 at 14:32

        Thank you =) And I’ll be praying for you too! I have spent time in the Word and in prayer about it. Just kind of waiting it out, seeing what happens and focusing on being okay in the meantime. And, I didn’t mean ‘perfect’, because no one is perfect for each other. I guess what I meant was VERY compatible personality wise and stuff

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by hgracek on July 24, 2014 at 18:45

      I was about to ask the exact same thing…

  44. Project Inspired

    Posted by nolasleuth on July 24, 2014 at 00:08

    SHOCKING NEWS,,,, God NEVER invented Dating !

    Dating was invented by Satan, dating is satans tool to undermine the Leadership of parents and put naive children in environments where sin is lurking to enslave them.

    Discernment and Wisdom are attributes which are learned with experience from obeying His commandments which causes people to make prudent decisions.

    Dating is the Worse technique for a christian to use for finding a spouse or having fun!
    Dating to find a spouse is like jumping out an airplane without a parachute.

    Dating is a practice that evokes feelings and emotions as a result of fun and pleasure.
    Dating does not always expose “deceptive motives”.
    Dating promotes theatrics from both people.

    Dating allows boys and girls to beguile & bewitch & bedazzle each others feelings & flesh!

    God brought Eve to Adam .
    God can bring you to your Adam too.
    Know the Masters Voice, learn his commandments,,,,
    Listen to His Voice and God will bring you your “Eve” or your “Adam” !

    But 1st,,, what condition are you in? Got any Christian Baggage or Issues?
    What spiritual condition or shape or you in?
    Is your Spouse getting a good deal ! OR what ????

    If you won’t let god fix you before you get married,,,,
    Your spouse cannot fix you either,,,,
    Therefore, you enter marriage in a “broken condition”.

    Get right,,, BEFORE you look for a spouse or get married.

    LOVE and PEACE !

    • Mandi Pi

      Posted by Mandi Pi on July 24, 2014 at 11:15

      ….Dating is not some sort of terrifying, dark, evil sin–it only turns into something bad when you do not go about it in a God-centered way. Yes, you should give God control of your love life, but you have to get to know your spouse first. 😛 How else do you plan to do that?

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Precioustime22 on July 24, 2014 at 08:09

      I actually disagree with you. Dating was not invented by the devil and I don’t think it’s sinful. The thing is, I really don’t like the fact how courting is treated on this high and mighty pedestal whereas dating is looked down upon but essentially they are the same thing. You can have a purpose when you date. There’s no rule that says you have to date for fun so I have no idea where got that from. Just because other people do it to meet new people does not meet their sinful. I agree that premarital sex is wrong. But I don’t think it’s your job to point out that people who date are sinning. I do not believe dating of in itself is sinful. Let God be the judge. I get that when you court you have the intention of marriage but when I first meet someone I don’t think if marrying them right away. And besides do you know how much that scares away guys when you put marriage out there right away before even becoming friends with them? I honestly feel bad for guys because they don’t need pressure like this. I’m not against marriage but throwing it out there right away is way to soon in my opinion. Maybe think about it in a few years when you know each other, but why the sudden rush?

  45. Shyanned

    Posted by Shyanned on July 23, 2014 at 16:26

    Oh my gosh you have no idea how much I needed this! Thank The Lord for having the perfect guy for me. I just need to have the patience to wait. I’ve never had a boyfriend because of this reason that I have to wait on The Lord. And that’s fine but I’ve had a few crushes. And sometimes it hurst knowing I can’t have the guy I’m crushing on. But then I snap back into reality and realize God has a plan.

  46. 01banana

    Posted by 01banana on July 23, 2014 at 07:21

    I really needed this. I was so excited when I saw this post. I can’t seem to get this guy off my mind but I REALLY want to. He’s a Christian and his family is really sweet and genuine. Great parents and treats his sisters right. Which is good cause that would mean he would treat me right. Anyway, I’ve known him since we were kids cause we’ve been going to the same church for a very long time. I just feel that he has a lot of things that he needs to work on spiritually. I know that I do too. So, I want to pursue God with all my heart and work on my own struggles. I don’t feel ready to be in a relationship with any guy yet. I need to figure out some things in my life like what career path do I want to pursue. What does God want me to do with the talents he gave me? I’m only 18 and I don’t want to rush with guys. I don’t know God’s plan for me yet or if it even includes this guy but I am more than willing to wait. Besides, I don’t even know if this guy really likes me in that way or not. I kind of feel like I’m getting mixed signals but maybe I’m just not thinking straight cause of my feelings toward him. Please pray for me. This is the only place that I’ll really talk about it with anyone.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by Type1Couture on August 4, 2014 at 18:47

      Totally feel the same way girl! I keep finding myself in a situation that’s like that– where I just start developing feelings for a great guy friend, even though I know I need to be patient and trust The Lord.

    • dancining_in_my_tardis

      Posted by dancining_in_my_tardis on July 25, 2014 at 08:06

      keep on girl! 😀

  47. Project Inspired

    Posted by Precioustime22 on July 22, 2014 at 20:21

    What if we have this problem, but there isn’t a guy for you to divert your attention from? Because instead of redirecting your attention on God your only replacing it for another guy. Which maybe it’s not a problem for other people but it’s a problem for me. So you set your heart on this guy (more than you realize) and you find out he doesn’t exist? Then what? There’s not a guy for everyone despite the popular belief. Why should I set my heart on someone who I don’t even know exists? What if I don’t desire to be married? And why even bother getting married? Marriage doesn’t last in heaven. It won’t count as anything.

    • HisCreation103

      Posted by HisCreation103 on August 21, 2014 at 21:07

      Hey 🙂 its totally fine to feel that way, we don’t really know if God has even prepared someone for us to be with. We don’t even know if we’re going to be here on earth in the next 10 years!
      God only knows and has finished writing the last chapter of our lives. He knows what we need before we ask him, so our relationship with Him should be our main focus. We just have to trust in him, have faith and continue to know Him more.
      Hopefully you feel encouraged 🙂

  48. Luthien Tinuviel

    Posted by Luthien Tinuviel on July 22, 2014 at 18:52

    About a year and a half ago, I started to have feelings for this fun Christian guy. He was homeschooled just like me, so we frequently ended up seeing eachother in homeschool activities. I did a drama class with him and a writing class, where I discovered that we shared a lot of interests and loved reading the same books. He also would encourage me and help me when I was writing my papers for class. We began to go to the same church as he did, but our family wasn’t crazy about it because it was a reformed church, and they did stuff a lot differently then the Baptist churches we usually go to. However, it was the only church in the area that had a lot of homeschooling families like us, so we continued to go. We enjoyed the Bible studies, which were held every other Wednesday night at his family’s house. His family was amazing and his mother is so sweet, so I knew she would make a good mother in law. I had recently read a book about Christian courtship and what you should be doing before marriage, what to look for in a husband, etc. So I didn’t let myself go crazy over him, just observed him and his behavior, and discovered that he was really wonderful with children and very respectful of his parents. At church one time, his dad stood up to talk about how thankful he was to have a son who was so loving, respectful, obedient, and talented. My mother really liked him too, and I know that’s a really good sign. One time in writing class, we were supposed to write an essay about something we felt strongly about, and I wrote a paper about how I thought mothers should stay at home with their children instead of working at a job. When his mother heard what I had written about, she looked at him and said, “That’s the kind of wife you want!” He also believed in courtship instead of dating, was, quite literally, tall, dark and handsome, and wrote beautiful fantasy stories and amazing piano compositions. I got to thinking, eventually, that although he seemed perfect, there were a couple of potential problems. My family only uses the King James version of the Bible, while his family uses some other version. When we had a child, he would probably want to get him/her baptized like the way they do in his church; being raised in a different denomination, I believe that baptism is something that should be done after the person is 1. old enough to understand the significance of this and 2. has received assurance of personal salvation. Shortly after I realized this, we began going to a different church, although we still went to their Bible studies once in a while, and we now live in a different state. I don’t know who God has planned for my life, but I am content to enjoy my single years. He is one of my best friends, and if God chooses to bring us together somehow, then awesome! However, if He doesn’t plan for us to be together, then I know somewhere out there is a guy who is (somehow) even more perfect for me then he is.

  49. Joygirl14

    Posted by Joygirl14 on July 22, 2014 at 16:06

    I have liked a guy for a while and the problem is, he’s not a bad guy. He’s actually a really good guy. He has an awesome relationship with our Lord, sweet, nice, (and to be honest, really cute). There really isn’t any problem or reason why I shouldn’t like him except I know that I am not ready to be in a relationship. I am almost 18 but at the same time I know deep in my heart that I will not be ready for a serious relationship until college or after college. What can I do to see him in a brotherly sort of way?

    • hereigns56

      Posted by hereigns56 on August 29, 2014 at 17:03

      Hey joygirl!
      Honestly I totally know the spot your in! Like, completely. You sound just like me last year, where by sheer coincidence I got invited to this guys house for thanksgiving by his aunt who HAPPENS to be my small group leader invited me and my sister (and my Mom, but she didn’t come). Before then I liked him, as a good Christian guy, but almost felt guilty and underserving of him and also knew as a senior in high school I wasn’t ready to date (especially with the amount of APs I was trying too hard to take…), his aunt kind of set me up with him. Although I obviously went to thanksgiving voluntarily. But I didn’t have good feelings about going farther in the relationship then, other than in my having thanksgiving with his family. I think Alyssa’s answer is amazing, and that’s kind of I think what I did. Pray! I pray for my future spouse, as well as the guy I went to thanksgiving with. The thought of them being the same thing is… dangerous, and for now not worth thinking about. But still, learning to treat this guy as a brother as well as a friend even at times when I am still learning what it means to love myself has helped me grow more in the past year than I could’ve ever thought. I prayed that God’s grace would be sufficient in my weakness, and his as well. Now I still know so little. I haven’t talked to this guy since then. But I have become so much more confident in God and He’s definitely changed me a ton. The obstacles aren’t gone, and especially with college starting and me deciding whether or not to go to the same college as him, I’m finding I need God’s guidance now more than ever, which is why I chose to read this article. But what you’re doing now is good, and both you and God will be happy about it later. 🙂

    • anzhela_16

      Posted by anzhela_16 on July 24, 2014 at 21:11

      This is crazy. My story is practically the same, except that I’m turning 17 in 2 months! I’ve tried to find “faults” in this guy I like, but I can’t seem to find anything. He’s the definition of perfect. He is talented, a great Christian, and he has perfect hair lol. He never loses his temper and always stands up for others. As crazy as it seems, I can’t find a reason not to like him, except that he might not like me back. He is perfect. But, as you said, I’m not ready for a serious relationahip, or any relationship at all. I think we just have to focus on our relationship with God above all else. I’ve noticed that when I live a God-centered lifestyle, everything seems to fall into place. I believe that God has it all figured out. As long as we allow His Will to be done in our lives, He will lead us to where He wants us to be. Whether it is with this guy or not. If this guy is the one God has chosen for you, you will be together no matter what! I’m not sure if I helped at all. I just got excited that someone has practically the same story as me 🙂 God bless you girl!!! <3

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by anb7196 on July 23, 2014 at 13:34

      Ask God to take control of your life. Ask him humbly to surrender this guy you like and give it to him. I have gone through the same thing, so whenever he pops into my heart. I ask the Lord to simply bless him and pray that the Lord will guide me to the One He has for me. Ask the Lord to help you see him in a brotherly fashion. Hope that helps!

      • Joygirl14

        Posted by Joygirl14 on July 24, 2014 at 13:51

        Thank you Alyssia (: That did help. I love this site because there are so many Godly girls on here that can give me advice and help me keep my sights on the Lord. Thank you!