“Dear Future Husband…”

    Dear Future Husband,

    How much am I looking forward to meeting you? With the dating scene more and more nuanced, I just can’t wait to get to know a guy like you. A guy who knows what he wants, who has goals and dreams and wants to share them with someone else. A guy who wants to get to know the real me. To help you get started, I figured I’d give you some hints.

    I’m complex, not complicated. I want you to pursue me—all my interests, my passions, my joys and fears. I want to know you in the same way. I look forward to saying on our 25th anniversary, “We’re still getting to know each other every day.” This doesn’t mean I’m hard to get to know, I just don’t like to put it all out there for just anyone. You’re going to have to work a little to know and understand me, but I know I’m worth it and so are you.

    I’m independent, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to need you. I’ve lived on my own since right after college. I’m used to pulling out my tool kit and looking up whatever I need to fix on YouTube. I kill all the bugs (or at least trap them under a cup), carry the groceries and unpack all the boxes when I move to a new apartment. Would I love to allow someone to share the load with me? Any day. I want you to open my car door and walk on the outside of the sidewalk to protect me. So when you see me struggling with that heavy box, know that I’m fine on my own, but I can’t wait for you to offer to carry it for me.

    I’ve had my heart broken before, but that doesn’t mean I’m not strong now. I’ve been intentional to talk and pray through past hurts with counselors, pastors and friends. I’m healing, although I may not be perfect. We’re both on a journey, one that hopefully we’ll be able to help each other on soon. I’m walking my part, and I hope you’re walking yours. I’ll continue to be strong in God and in my own heart until you’re here to add your strength to the mix.

    I’ll be your biggest fan, your encourager and confidant. When I care about someone, I want them to be their best self. Same goes for you. When you tell me your dreams, I’ll ask you how soon we can get started making them come true. I’ll ask what your first step is and when you plan to take it, and then I’ll cheer you on the whole way there. I want you to live a full and adventurous life with me, with both of us fulfilling our purpose and calling together.

    I’m so excited for the life we’ll live together, the places we’ll travel to, the people we’ll meet and the kingdom work we’ll be a part of together. Together will be my favorite place.


    Your Future Wife

    Kate Hilderbrandt
    I am addicted to potential. I live in Atlanta, GA, where I work as Innovation Manager for The Mission Society, and spend a great deal of time drinking coffee and asking questions that move people toward their dreams. I am a certified professional coach who loves working with female entrepreneurs, discovering life-giving rhythms together to craft a life that works. Twitter: IG:


    1. I love this so much! It sums up my thoughts as of late PERFECTLY. I mostly want my future husband to know that I love them, too, and it’s not just about what I want. This is a great article.

    2. Hi can I just say that I love this post! It is so special and so amazing. I also started writing to my future husband and it is so fun I must say. It keeps the dream alive. God will always be there and He knows just the right time for everything.

    3. Oh how much I get a kick out of these cheesy pi “dear future husband” posts LOL! I guess cause I’m not a chick flick loving hopeless romantic, I never see the allure girls get out of writing these letters but I guess if it makes you happy there’s nothing wrong with that to each his own.

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