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    Dear Girl, You Don’t Have to be Like Anyone Else

    Have you ever felt like you needed to have the same hair, eye color, or other physical features that another girl has? Or that you needed to speak with the same tone of voice, decibel level, and manner as someone else you know? Have you seen another Christian girl that you admire and then believed that you have to pattern every area of your life to be an exact replica of hers?

    I know I have.

    But, by God’s grace, there is now something else I know: the truth to combat this struggle.

    The truth is that you, dear girl, have been made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27). You are precious in the sight of God (Isaiah 43:4). You have been formed by God and declared to be His own (Isaiah 43:1-2). He delights in you and rejoices over you (Zephaniah 3:16-17). YOU. The truth is that you have been made to be an image-bearer of God– not of the celebrity, family member, friend, or mentor you idolize.

    These are two important truths I want you to remember:

    • You have been fearfully and wonderfully made just as you are.

    Psalm 139:13-14 says, “For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.” Verse 15 declares that we were “skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.” We were intentionally formed and skillfully fashioned by a God Who does not make mistakes (see Psalm 145:17).

    To believe that you were created to be like someone else is to deny the truths of these passages. God made you to be you and no one else. You are not a mistake, nor were you meant to merely be a carbon copy of another girl. The Lord was intentional, loving, faithful, and skillfully creative when He made you just as you are. You are beautiful, wonderfully made, and one of a kind. Rest in that truth, sister.

    • You have been purposefully given unique gifts and talents to go along with your unique personality. 

    First Corinthians 12:4-7, 11 says, “There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all. But the manifestation of the Spirit is given to each one for the profit of all….But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.”

    God has a good, pleasing, and perfect will (Romans 12:2) and part of that will is that each member of the body of Christ, the Church, be given a unique set of special gifts and talents to be used to the glory of God and the good of others.

    You have gifts that have been handpicked by God and given to you specifically – gifts that I don’t have. It isn’t God’s will that you discard those special gifts in order to attempt to take on the gifts given to someone else. No, dear girl, delight in the gifts given to you by an all-wise, all-loving God with a special plan for your unique life.

    We deprive the Church when we try to be like someone else. The fact of the matter is that we need each other (and we need each other’s uniqueness!). The strength of the Body and our witness to the world is what is at stake here. I’ll leave you today with the words of 1 Corinthians 12:14-19. May they encourage your heart!

    “For in fact, the body is not one member but many.  If the foot should say, ‘Because I am not a hand, I am not of the body,’ is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear should say, ‘Because I am not an eye, I am not of the body,” is it therefore not of the body?  

    If the whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling? But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased. And if they were all one member, where would the body be?

    The fact of the matter, friend, is that the Body of Christ needs you – just as you are! If we as the Body are deprived of you, your gifts, and your talents, because you are too busy believing yourself to be inferior and in need of copying someone else rather than living as the person God called you to be, we will never be as strong as we could be.

    Our ability to reach the lost world with the love, grace, truth, and good news of Christ is dependent upon each member of Christ’s Body working together in the capacity intentionally given to each one.

    So, what do you say, sister? Will you walk in the path God has carved out for you? Will you live according to your unique personality, giftings, and talents? I sure hope so! Because we need you.

    Rebekah Hargraves
    Rebekah Hargraves
    Rebekah Hargraves is a wife, mama of two littles, blogger, podcaster, and author whose passion is to edify, equip, and encourage women in their journey of Biblical womanhood, particularly with an emphasis on the gospel and its implications for everyday life. Rebekah's first book, "Lies Moms Believe (And How the Gospel Refutes Them)" released the fall of 2017, and the "Lies Moms Believe" Companion Bible Study came out March 30, 2018. You can find Rebekah on her website, Hargraves Home and Hearth, on Instagram, or on iTunes via The Home and Hearth podcast.

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