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Christian Life

Girl to Girl Talk: How Do I Stand Up to Mean Girls?

Every week I go through the “Girl Talk” topics and read through the forum to help answer questions and give advice to you PI readers. One that caught my eye was called “Stand Up for Yourself,” in which a PI Girl asked about a friend who was not being very nice and what to do when people are not so nice to you.

Here is part of her question: I’m going back to school soon, and there’s always the chance of a kid calling you a name, or a teacher picking on you. I was wondering, as a Christian, how can I stand up for myself? I don’t want to fight, or go off in a swearing/yelling battle with my sister, like how I used too. I want to handle the situation in a calm way, so if my sister does freak out at me again, what can I say? How does a Christian stand up for themselves when getting treated wrongly? Should I just say, ‘Please don’t talk to me like that’?”

Click here to read the entire post.

First, as Christians, we do not fight back with worldly weapons. God fights our battles for us, and of course we don’t let people walk all over us, but we need to first take it to Jesus and ask God to help us in the situation. God is all-knowing and He sees your heart. He knows when it hurts. When friends mistreat you or people hurt your feelings, know God has your back, loves you and will fight for you.

Here are some scriptures to remember when you want to retaliate:

The Lord will fight for you; you only need to be still (Exodus 14:14).

The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:4).

Here are some scriptures about gossip and how it is harmful:

He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends (Proverbs 17:9).

The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts (Proverbs 18:8).

When people hurt your feelings or are being mean, try these four steps to handle the situation:

  1.  Pray, ask Jesus to help you control your tongue and to have self-control.
  2. Think about scriptures and meditate on God’s truth.
  3. Tell a teacher or parent if the situation is threatening.
  4. Turn the other cheek and be kind to your enemies, even if your instinct is to be mean back! (Don’t be a mean girl!)

We love you PI girls! Write a comment below and tell us if this helped you or if you have any other questions! Keep posting in the “Girl Talk” section, too!

Image: Thinkstock | istockphoto


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  1. Sabrinafair608

    Posted by Sabrinafair608 on January 23, 2013 at 03:32

    So the best thing… is to just walk away? Whenever I do that then they starting staying stuff like “you’re weak.” or something. And yeah, I get angry so easily.

  2. Project Inspired

    Posted by Carin28Foster on January 7, 2013 at 09:19

    I know from experience that this works, and that it really hurts more than just yourself if you do choose to retaliate. Relying on God for backup, the Holy Spirit for direction, and Jesus as an example. He could have sent legions of angels to topple over the Saducees and Pharasees, but He didn’t because He knew that dying was what needed to be done. 🙂 I’m glad that He chose me over His own feelings.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by pink5678 on January 15, 2013 at 16:48

      this helped alote because i get mad so easy and now i know the right thing to do

  3. cookies n cream

    Posted by cookies n cream on January 6, 2013 at 11:58

    thanx i will do this now instead cuz i get angry very easily:)

  4. Paris

    Posted by Paris on January 5, 2013 at 21:25

    Great advice. It shows that us christian girls can have class but stand up for ourselves,too!!! 😀

  5. cupcake99

    Posted by cupcake99 on January 5, 2013 at 20:40

    i did this once when there were these girls being mean to me and my freind: you say: i’m gonna zip up my invisible wall now so i don’t have to listen to you and then you reach down and act like your pulling a zipper and turn around and act like you can’t hear them it’ll drive them crazy but you have to act like you can’t here a word they say

  6. sisterwhocares

    Posted by sisterwhocares on January 5, 2013 at 19:22

    Great post! One question though: how do you respond to someone teasing/mocking/questioning your virginity (ie calling you gay, saying you will be a nun, etc)? Are their ways to respond to those insults with grace and not with sassy comebacks to make them look dumb (which I am tempted to do all the time)? What are SPECIFIC things I should say? Thanks! 🙂

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by KayMZ on January 15, 2013 at 09:01

      If they say you are going to be a nun, tell them thank you for thinking so highly of you. If you can’t tell, I have a high respect for nuns.

  7. Kyla

    Posted by Kyla on January 5, 2013 at 15:52

    I would also like to say maybe praying for the bully is a good idea. And let them know you’re praying for them. Kill with kindness. It may even win them over to Jesus. Always remember that people act the way they do because something is going on that ou have no idea about. Jesus can save anyone.

  8. Project Inspired

    Posted by NatalieNoel13 on January 5, 2013 at 11:10

    That definitely helps! 🙂 thank you.