|   Log In

Christian Life

Girl to Girl Talk: Being Bullied Hurts a Lot

Every week, I go through our Girl Talk message boards to find topics that are popping, and contribute my thoughts where it makes sense! One of the topics is getting a lot of attention. It was written by PI Girl theoutsidersgirl:

I get bullied at school and at times by my own friends. Very few of the kids like me. I’ve never been asked out. I get called ugly, kids lie about me to teachers, I’m always picked last in gym, kids will tell be to shut up and that no one cares.

You can read her entire post by clicking here.

Do you agree with this answer from caring PI Girl taytay? “bullying STINKS but this isn’t your fault. it’s all part of God’s plan for your life.”

Maybe it is God’s plan but PI readers, let me tell you one thing: God LOVES you, cares for you and hates it when you are being picked on, criticized or being mistreated.

God is your confidence, your Dad (Heavenly Father) and you can always confide in HIM! Man can only do what they want to an extent. But God sees everything and believe me, He is in control. You may be asking: “Why does God allow me to be bullied?”

Here is my personal response based off what I have learned reading the Word of God. We live in a broken, fallen world and Satan wants to steal, kill, and destroy God’s plan and life for you (John 10). When people are mistreating you, this is what you need to do.

1. Pray. God’s word says that we are wrestling against the spiritual, not the physical (Ephesians 6). What will ultimately be effective is to use spiritual armor and weapons, not worldly ones. What are spiritual weapons? They are prayer, reading the Bible, and using scripture, which is the sword of the Spirit. When you pray, it is powerful and effective! If we don’t pray we can become weak and lose our hope, which is exactly what the enemy wants.

It says in the Bible, “The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective” (James 5:16), This is saying a believer’s prayer will have powerful results! Prayer is often overlooked or is something people think you just do before you eat, or before you go to bed…no! Prayer is so important! It is vital in protecting yourself in the fallen, broken world we live in.

I would also recommend praying for the person who has harmed or hurt your feelings. I know it seems strange, but Jesus tells us to turn the other cheek and pray for your enemies and those who persecute you! This doesn’t mean let people walk all over you, it just means pray for the person who is being mean because usually THEY are the ones who need help, healing and Jesus. They need prayer, forgiveness and love. Remember, God tells us “Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:8).

But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven (Matthew 5:44).

2. Tell a parent, teacher or friend if the situation is serious or threatening–you need to report it to an adult. If it is teasing or name calling, you can definitely tell a friend to pray for you, but tell a teacher if it escalates. Remember, we all face some type of persecution as Christians. Jesus warns us of that, so if you are suffering as a believer or because of your faith, it is actually Biblical. It doesn’t make it right, it just shows you that some people will not like Christians. Know that you are not alone, you are loved and remember Jesus was made fun of too!! He understands what you are going through!! They spit in His face, mocked Him and crucified Him. Jesus said, “…They hated me without reason” (John 5:25).

I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you may have suffering. But take courage! I have conquered the world (John 16:33).

3. Remember who you really are and know your TRUE identity. If someone says something about you, it doesn’t make it true. You are Daughters and Sons of the Most High God! Satan trembles at this knowing the potential, the future and the power we as believers have! He attacks those who threaten him! Let me tell you something, when you pray and you walk in confidence knowing your identity, nothing can shake you! Remember, NOTHING can separate you from God’s LOVE and power!! 🙂 Amen?!

For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord! (Romans 8:38-39)

PI readers, Jesus LOVES you so much and dislikes it when you’re hurt, sad, or feeling mistreated! Remember your true identity as a Daughter and or Son of the King of Kings! May God bless you all! Please comment below if this article helped you or if you have other topics you’d like me to write about.

Image: Thinkstock | istockphoto

POST A COMMENT

You must be logged in to post a comment.

21 Comments

  1. belladoesntsuck

    Posted by belladoesntsuck on October 23, 2013 at 13:23

    I can relate. I always get picked last- or close to last- in Gym. Partly because I’m bad at Gym. It still hurts, though. The teachers tend to pick the popular people in my class as captains- not intentionally, though- and they leave the “outsiders” to be picked last. I’ve always told myself that if I get picked to be a captain, I’ll pick all of the unpopular people first. Subsequently, the populars will get picked near the end and it may show them what it feels like and change their decisions in the future.

    I don’t have tons of friends, either. But remember; it’s quality not quantity! I feel your pain, though, and it shouldn’t be taken lightly. I get mean stares lots of times from mean girls. Once I bumped into someone by accident, in Gym, and I sincerely apologized and they ROLLED THEIR EYES AT ME! That stung a bit. People sometimes ignore me, too. We’ll be in a group talking, and I’ll say something and some people ignore me.

    I don’t let it get the best of me. I remember my true friends- most of whom live across the country, because I moved- and Jesus. Jesus was an outcast, too. He was treated like dirt. He knows how we’re feeling and love us unconditionally!

  2. Project Inspired

    Posted by meladimcnair on January 12, 2013 at 13:04

    Being bullied is an absolute nightmare for everyone involved, the victim, the villain, the parents of both, and authority figures.

    I actually wrote a book about this called “The Vexing”, showing the psychological aspects of bullying.

    Check it out and share!

  3. Deportistachica99

    Posted by Deportistachica99 on January 11, 2013 at 15:12

    I’ve been bullied for several years now. Sometimes, it’s even my own friends hurting me, though they don’t know it. I’ve found that by praying to God, it doesn’t hurt as much. There will always be bullies as long as there is sin in this world, but just imagine what it will be like when Jesus comes back to reign again!

  4. NerdyChick334

    Posted by NerdyChick334 on January 11, 2013 at 09:58

    Really agree with number 1. Prayer is crucial and even when it’s all you can do about a situation, it’s just sooooo powerful because it means we’re communicating with God and placing your trust in Him that His will will be done! Remember that no matter how much it hurts you right now, your bullying will end sometime. And actually, suffering, especially if it’s done in His name (Matthew 5:10-12) can make you into a much stronger Christian. Also, don’t forget about John 15:18-27 8]

  5. olburrows

    Posted by olburrows on January 10, 2013 at 14:12

    Before I was a Christian, (throughout elementary school and a few of my high school years), I got bullied. I had supposedly “Christian” friends, but they still were mean to the bullies. That’s not right! We’re taught to love even our enemies! I switched schools for my last four years of high school, though not because of bullying. I went from public to private school and have been transformed through Jesus! I now have learned some of the mistakes I’ve made (and the mistakes my former friend’s have made). God allowed me to suffer through bullying, but he has also allowed me to be a stronger person because of it. I pray you will not allow bullying to get to you. Good luck! PI girls love you!

  6. Project Inspired

    Posted by princessnae0897 on January 8, 2013 at 17:25

    i wish I had read this a while back when i was bullied all throughout middle school. I was called fat and girls taunted me to the point of physical violence. I was kicked in the hallways and one of them threw a fork at me at lunch. I went to an adult but the pain lingered for a long time and made me depressed. But now I know longer struggle with bullying because I go to a school that excepts me for who I am. i feel liberated and blessed beyond words. =)

  7. IdaPahus

    Posted by IdaPahus on January 8, 2013 at 01:59

    Awesome article! I would like if you would make a post from a biblical view on homosexuality.

  8. Paris

    Posted by Paris on January 7, 2013 at 19:25

    Awesome advice,Chrissy!!!

    (Exodus 14:14) The Lord will fight for you; you only need to BE STILL.

  9. Project Inspired

    Posted by Gymnast4Jesus3 on January 7, 2013 at 19:18

    At school, I feel like I’m a whole different person, I can’t shine there, I can’t speak Gods word without getting criticized and mocked. I’ve considered asking my parents to send me to a new, Christian school, but there are not any around because we live in a small town. I’ve considered maybe asking them to send me to a boarding school in Chicago, which is only a couple hours away from where I live in southern Wisconsin, but its too much money. I would love it there, nice Christian friends who really GET me, and who I am as a person.
    I always thought small towns were supposed to. Be cherry and nice, but maybe I’m wrong.

    • ChristinaGiven

      Posted by ChristinaGiven on January 8, 2013 at 22:12

      Aww, I am so sorry Symantha. I will pray God sends you a friend who is a Christian and can encourage you in the faith. God knows where you are in your life and he sees everything. Ask God to give you the courage and the wisdom to be able to shine in school and to be loving to everyone around you! (Even if they don’t believe the same way as you do) It says in the Bible that people will know Jesus by the way that you love them. 🙂 I am praying for you!

  10. Eurydice

    Posted by Eurydice on January 7, 2013 at 16:56

    I think it’s interesting that the very worst bullying I’ve ever faced was among other Christians–specifically at my Christian middle school and at a couple of the churches I attended. Yes, I’ve been picked on at secular institutions, but I found it to be a lot more hurtful when it came from other Christians…especially when the adults in charge (teachers/pastors) either ignored it or even took part in it, too. In secular institutions, it was easier to brush off the hurt as nonsense spewed by people who don’t have the love of Christ in their hearts, but when it came from people who at the very least claimed to be followers of Christ? It blew my mind. I’m not saying I expect Christians to be model citizens all the time, but we know better; we are taught to love others as ourselves.

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by KTLove on January 10, 2013 at 20:18

      Me too Eurydice…its sad too because I got to a Private Catholic school and I am still bullied. I always stand up for myself but that makes people be even more mean to me. They say I’m being oversensitive and should just deal with it. But I try to remember that God is always there for me 🙂

      • Project Inspired

        Posted by SamanthaMartins on January 17, 2013 at 17:43

        Basically the same story here. I go to a PRIVATE CHRISTAN school, and yet I am bullied and picked on all the time. I get laughed at called names, and even today I got pushed into a locker. I hate talking about it though….I really want to change schools but my parents would never let me….I’ve begged them many times. My other two best friends (one I’ve been super close to for almost 9 years, and the other who I’ve been pretty close to for 2 years now) both went to the same school as me. However, the both left at the start of this school year because of the people at my school. They were both picked on and called names, too. The one who I’ve been friends with for 9 years was really belittled and picked on last year by this group of super mean bitches (sorry for the language, its truly after all the pain I’ve endured the only thing I can call them) and when she finally went to the administration with this issue they sided with the girls who were obviously the bullies and my friend got suspended for chapel leadership (worship band that plays at chapel which she was the main singer in) for 2 weeks. The bullies didn’t even get a detention, or even a warning (they were looked on as being innocent, and they were pitied). To this very day I still have to deal with them (however without my friends standing strong besides me). It is a constant struggle, I truly feel your (all of your) pain. Being bullied has made me do many things that I regret.

    • ChristinaGiven

      Posted by ChristinaGiven on January 8, 2013 at 22:10

      Yes Eurydice, that is why we cannot put our trust in MAN but soley in GOD. Man fails us, but Jesus & God never fail us! <3 🙂 Thank God for that, amen?! But I do know that hurts sometimes and we do expect people with faith to have more love but sometimes people fall. Just pray when that happens! Hope this helps!! 🙂

      • Eurydice

        Posted by Eurydice on January 9, 2013 at 06:30

        Actually, that was part of the problem. Whenever I told someone about what was going on, all they said was to pray about it. That solved nothing because no one was willing to act. So…I eventually stopped telling people and just wallowed in bitter resentment–for the people hurting me, for the people ignoring the problem, and sometimes even for God. It took a VERY long time to recover from that. In fact, I’m still seeing a therapist about the church bullying.

  11. Project Inspired

    Posted by june152011 on January 7, 2013 at 15:09

    What if your being bullied but its not at school, its at home?

    • Eurydice

      Posted by Eurydice on January 7, 2013 at 16:58

      It depends on who’s doing the bullying. If it’s a sibling, talk to your parents, and if they won’t do anything about it, try consulting another adult you trust–a pastor, youth group leader, or a school counselor (if you’re not homeschooled). If it’s a parent, skip right to the trusted adult.

  12. faulty-but-real

    Posted by faulty-but-real on January 7, 2013 at 13:43

    i was the victim of bullying,and YES,it stinks! you always feel like you’re just not good enough,or you lost a friend due to it,and you think you have no one,but you do have someone,you have the ENTIRE website of PI and you have God. someone told me this once: I personaly don’t know you,but i love you. God ersonaly knows you,and he loves you. for awhile i was really angry at God,because he let all of these bad things happen to me,but even though i still get really pissed off (sorry for languaage) at him,or when i think he doesn’t have time for me,or if i think,”I’ve done this terrible thing,and i can’t take it back,God must hate me,and i don’t blame him cause i hate me too.” things like that,i had/have to give myself a reality check. there’s so much God has to offer each and everyone of us. we just have to wait.

  13. horseluver2498

    Posted by horseluver2498 on January 7, 2013 at 13:03

    I agree with all this, but it’s definitely okay to stand up for yourself and tell them to stop. Kids are WAY more likely to stop bullying you if you make them respect you by showing you’re not afraid to let them know you will not be walked all over. You should kindly but firmly tell them they need to stop, that they are being really disrespectful, and you are giving them a chance to cut it out before you go to an adult. You don’t want to take turning the other cheek too far, because they need to at least respect you and think twice about teasing you. Ignore the petty stuff, but if they start spreading rumours or calling you names to your face and they won’t stop, it’s okay, (and right) to stand up to them. God doesn’t want you to suffer needlessly.