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Recently, a PI Girl asked for advice about how to stop being verbally abusive to her family or just taking the stress of life out on those closest to her. She doesn’t want to do this and wanted some advice on how to overcome this type of behavior.
In life, sometimes stress piles up from homework, exams, puberty, relationships, peer pressure or responsibilities, and we can tend to take things out on our family. How do we hold our tongues and stop lashing out at our closest ones, the ones we love?
And don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry. (Ephesians 4:26)
The Bible talks about the tongue being like a small rudder on a ship, and how it steers the entire boat. Your tongue steers your life and can cause encouragement or damage. Do you have anything you need to apologize for or to repent of? Do you tend to take things out on your parents or siblings? Being around those whom we are comfortable with can cause us to put our guard down and to be careless, lacking respect. We must acknowledge that our parents are to be honored and our neighbors to be loved (Ephesians 6:2). It’s not easy to decrease the flesh, but with the Holy Spirit and being filled with God’s Word, we can do it!
Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. (James 3:5-6)
Do you tend to have built-up pressure that boils inside and explodes on your brother, sister, boyfriend, parent or even your best friend? Think about who you are grateful for in your life and write a list of people you are appreciative for. Next, if you have anyone you need to say sorry to, or if you have lashed out in your words or attitudes in a negative way, it is important to examine, confess and repent. We all make mistakes and we all have hard days, but we must remember to not let the sun go down while we are upset. God is so faithful to forgive us when we say sorry and we make an effort to turn from our past.
He must increase, but I must decrease. (John 3:30)
Five Ways to Avoid Lashing Out at Your Loved Ones
1. Read the Word and pray.
2. Stay filled up with the Holy Spirit and humble yourself. (Decrease your flesh and increase your spirit with worship, praise and staying connected to Jesus.)
3. Acknowledge your problem and ask God to help you.
4. Repent, confess and walk in forgiveness.
5. Appreciate, honor and value those around you. Show your parents and friends how much you really care—even if it is a verbal acknowledgement or card, or apologize if you have mistreated them.
PI Girls, how can we pray for you? Do you tend to struggle with taking things out on your roomies or family? Comment below! Let us know how we can help you!