Girl to Girl Talk: “Help! I Feel Far From God…How Do I Stay Connected to Him?”

    Every week, I go through the “Girl Talk” section of Project Inspired and look for those seeking advice and counsel. I want to help answer some questions you may have about living out your Christian life and walk of faith! We want PI to be a safe place where you can ask questions. Contact me @ChristiGiven.

    This week, a PI Girl wrote on the Girl Talk forum here. Join the chat if you would like!

    “I am so disconnected from God in my life and I really need prayer. I have addictions to sins that I’m ashamed of, but this point I enjoy them so much that I don’t want to let them go. So please, please, please pray that I can get back in touch with God, and not only change, but that I get a desire to change. Thanks.”

    Read more here.

    This is something a lot of people face in life and in their journey of faith. Many people live defeated Christian lives because they do not read the Word to renew their minds and they are not connected to the vine (John 15:5). We MUST be in fellowship, in church or youth group, in prayer and in relationship with the church and the Lord to flourish.

    Imagine if I told you to keep a flower healthy, growing and flourishing, but first I asked you to cut it from the root or the plant in which it originally came from. The growth of the flower would not happen because it is not connected to the SOURCE. It is not connected to water, to life, to the branches. This flower that I asked you to take out from the original place it was birthed would die because it is not connected.

    Jesus says in the Bible:

    “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)


    This illustration I just expressed to you is what the Bible says happens to us when we are NOT in the body of Christ in fellowship at church or youth group. It is also what happens when we do go to church, but come in and out when we please or to just clock in and out so we “feel better.” No, that is not how it works and that is how you will end up feeling defeated. You are doing the godly tasks, but not from a genuine heart of worship. We need genuine fellowship with the Lord and we need to wholeheartedly be seeing God. Those who “play” church will not flourish because they are not going for the right reasons. We need to be a people who worship God in Spirit and in truth. That is what the Bible says God is looking and searching for. He desires people who GENUINELY want to worship Him and be in a relationship with Him.


    You will seek me and find me when you seek me with ALL your heart. (Jeremiah 29:13)


    God is spirit, and his worshipers MUST worship in the Spirit and in truth. (John 4:24)


    Imagine if I asked you to be friends with some people who really weren’t very interested in hanging out with you at all. How would you feel if your friends were only hanging out with you out of obligation? Wow, that would hurt, wouldn’t it? In the same way, Jesus and the Lord God our Father are hurt when we ignore or don’t worship out of a reverent, humble heart that truly wants to have communion with the Lord.


    While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, “Take and eat; this is my body.” (Matthew 26:26)


    It isn’t good enough just to go to church and read the Bible once in your life. You cannot base your relationship off of one time you did something for God. You need to continually water the relationship, like a plant. You need to water your soul with the LIVING WATER (the Word of God), and Jesus, who is the living water. We need to commune with God, like how Jesus gave the example of eating with one another and breaking bread with each other. Eating, drinking and talking at a table like at family dinners are so important and key in relationships—that is why Jesus set the example.

    Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.(John 6:35)


    Jesus is the Word and the Word is the bread of life. The scripture in Matthew 26:26 doesn’t mean literally eat Jesus, but it is symbolic of eating the Word (or reading the Bible like daily bread). If we refuse to eat the Word, we will starve spiritually, amen? I am not only speaking to you out there reading this, but to myself. We ALL need spiritual manna and food. Let me tell you something: We will not survive this faith walk without our daily bread. It would be impossible. The flesh, the world and the devil wage war with us daily and we need to keep putting on our FULL armor. We need to renew our minds daily, not once a week, but every day!

    Once we understand the revelation of everyday manna, or daily bread, that will translate to the scripture in John 15, where it says “abide.” To “abide” means “to remain stable or fixed in a state.” We need to remain in the Word, day and night. Of course we will have other priorities such as work, school, family and friend time, but at least we can commit to reading a verse a day and something to fuel our faith and renew our thoughts daily, amen?!


    How to Stay Connected to God

    1. Read God’s Word. You are and become what you think. What you think is what you believe. What you believe and think, you will live out. You need to renew your mind (Ephesians 4:23).

    2. Get involved in Bible study or youth group. Fellowship is KEY in spiritual growth.

    3. Pray. We need to communicate with our Lord every day. How would you feel if you barely talked to your parents or your friends? There wouldn’t be a strong bond, would there? Prayer is just like talking…telling God what you are thinking and feeling. He cares and wants you to pray to Him. Even though God knows every need before we ask, it takes effort and time to pray and that honors and blesses God. So just do it to please our Father, amen? Also, when you pray, the peace of God will guard you.

    4. Have like-minded friends. How can you grow spiritually if you are around poison or toxic people? Just like the plant and flower illustration I gave earlier, imagine taking your flower in your flower pot and pouring water over it and putting it in sunlight and watching it bloom. Then suddenly you pour something toxic over the plant…the flower would die eventually and would not be able to grow. What is stunting your growth? What is blocking you from flowering and becoming the young woman of God He designed you to be? You have to choose; God won’t pick your friends for you. Beware of toxic or draining people. Ask God for wisdom in how to deal with people and ask for godly friends to walk and grow with, amen?

    I love what Psalm 1:1-6 says:

    Blessed is the one

    who does not walk in step with the wicked

    or stand in the way that sinners take

    or sit in the company of mockers,

    but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,

    and who meditates on his law day and night.

    That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,

    which yields its fruit in season

    and whose leaf does not wither—

    whatever they do prospers.

    Not so the wicked!

    They are like chaff

    that the wind blows away.

    Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,

    nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

    For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous,

    but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.


    PI Girls, do you have any questions? You can always message me with further questions by commenting below or private-message me at

    God bless you! I am praying for you!

    Christi Given
    Christi Given
    Christi Given is a former Trinity Broadcasting Network host for the JUCE TV NETWORK, and has been featured on the Hillsong Channel. Her passion is to reach the youth with the Gospel and her music. Given has been writing for Project Inspired since 2011, and hopes to encourage the younger generation in their faith.


    1. You mentioned how you can’t base your relationship with God off of one good thing, and this reminded me of the lesson from my youth group last week. It was talking about faith, so not exactly the same, but similar. The lesson was focusing on Matthew 14:22-36, which describes the story about how the disciples saw Jesus walking on water and Peter got out of the boat to walk to him on the water. When Peter began to lose faith, he started to sink, and Jesus said to him, “Oh ye of little faith, why do you doubt?” It took so much faith for Peter to get out of the boat in the middle of a storm and put his life in Jesus’ hands like that. I don’t know if I could do that – I would be afraid of drowning! But Peter did; he had faith in Jesus. He walked on water! But when he lost sight of Jesus and started thinking about the wind and the storm and the waves instead of about Him, he began to sink.

      It wasn’t enough for Peter to show that great amount of faith just once, when he got out of the boat. Likewise, it isn’t enough to just have one good thing to base your relationship with God off of. If Peter wanted to walk across all the water to get to Jesus, he needed to have faith the entire time. If you want to have a relationship with God, you have to see your relationship through until the end. Sooo yeah there’s my sermon for the day 😉

    2. This is exactly what I needed. I am 19 and I don’t know what to do with my life. I go to church every Sunday and Wednesday but I never read the bible. I pray and ask God to show me what he wants me to do but I feel like he never talks to me or listens. When I go to church I don’t go to listen I go, like you said, “to just clock in and out”. I’ve been comparing myself to people who don’t go to church, I tell myself ” well at least I go to church” but I don’t listen to the sermon, I’m on my phone or iPad. I’ve also never heard reading the bible said that way. I’ve heard it called the bread of life but I’ve never thought about how not reading it is like starving your spiritual self. Thank you so much for this article It’s really opened my eyes to what I need to do. I treat God like an obligation not a friend, that needs to change.

    3. This is just what I need to read, thank you so much for this article! I go to church Sundays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays, yet i still have so many moments where I feel disconnected from God. Reading this, I now know that reading the Bible is so important, and really it’s the key to help me get rid of the negative thoughts that constantly discourage me every day. This is great advice, and i’m so glad that i’m not experiencing this battle alone.

    4. Thank you so much for this article, I really needed it. Lately I have kinda fallen back from God, and I am slowly trying to mend my relationship with Him. Mostly, because I want to, I desire that strong relationship that I had with Him, a while ago. But also, because I have recently decided to go on a missions trip to Zambia and South Africa next summer, and I don’t think i would be ready. I’ve realized that you can’t try and help someone else to the Lord, if you aren’t helped yourself. You can’t show His love if you haven’t experienced it yourself. So I’m glad you wrote this article, it has really opened my eyes and given me guidance. Thank you again! 🙂

    5. Thank you so much. I’m going through a really hard time and I feel myself drift farther and farther away from God. And I’ve found that its harder to get back on track and start the devotions and bible reading when you haven’t for so long. I’m deffinately going to try this and it will work!

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