Girl-to-Girl Talk: How to Forgive Loved Ones Who Have Hurt You

    This week, a PI girl anonymously asked what to do when loved ones closest to you hurt you so deeply. I wanted to address this because this type of pain can run so deep, especially when you have to face your loved ones on a regular basis. Unkind words, attitudes and misunderstandings can cause pain that can lead to bitterness and resentment. We want to refuse unforgiveness in our lives and we want to freely forgive as we have been forgiven.

    Even when people hurt you, we have to remember that it’s not them. We are in a spiritual, unseen battle that can be ferocious. Maybe you have family members who aren’t for your dreams or they belittle your visions. Maybe you have someone in your life who always misinterprets what you say and or takes it the wrong way. Girl, I have been there and let me tell you, the only way to find hope is to run to Jesus and to forgive those around me. 

    Many times, we can overshare to people who simply don’t get us or our calling. Jesus experienced this and he said, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34) Many times you will have a friend who becomes a Judas, or a Peter who denies you, or you may feel anonymous or in unacknowledged. Jesus was anonymous for 30 years before he began his offices public ministry and before he was revealed as Messiah. 

    Not everyone saw Christ for who he really was. Jesus said, “a prophet is not received or accepted in his own hometown.” (Luke 4:24) Remember they mocked Jesus and said, “nothing good could come from Nazareth.” (John 1:46) We have all had people belittle us and tear us down out of our true identities as daughters of the King. The truth is: we ARE victorious, we ARE successful already in Christ, we ARE more than conquerors!! (Romans 8) 

    Sometimes when we walk boldly in our authority, the enemy can use people even our families or friends or those closest to us to test that identity. Do you really stand on the rock of Jesus Christ? Do you really BELIEVE what God says about you? Man’s opinion shouldn’t sway you but it doesn’t mean people’s attitudes, misunderstandings and or judgements doesn’t hurt. 

    The hardest part is when you are obeying God and people misjudge you or your vision, which I believe is a form of persecution. I go through this regularly with being called to Hollywood. Many people could think I am chasing fame, but I’m chasing Jesus and making HIS NAME FAMOUS. I’m using the airwaves and the PLATFORM of media, for God’s glory! God took me out of Hollywood in 2008, I became born again, and now I’m changing the airwaves to what God told me was a revival called, HOLYWOOD. The Lord is good and faithful.

    Regardless of what people think, if you are obeying God they cannot stop God’s plan. (Job 42) Don’t let your family or friends stop you from the call of God on your life or make you question Christ’s path for you when he speaks to you. Pray for your enemies or those who persecute you, as the Bible says and overcome evil with good. Turn the other cheek, and realize you are in Christ’s position, because He too- was persecuted. 

    “Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.’ And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice.” (Luke 23:34)

    Just remember, God is your defender and also, He wants you to FORGIVE those who mistreat you, persecute you, misunderstand you… they really don’t know who you are in the spirit or what they are doing. God will deal with them, He is a God of vengeance and recompense, and also God wants you to release forgiveness. 

    To release forgiveness it frees you from any bondage you may have or any bitterness you may have stored up in your heart. God doesn’t want you to hold any grudges, and if you are spiritually more mature than others around you or have fought battles in the spirit and passed tears and have certificates in the spirit that they don’t have it’s not fair because they’re not on that same level as you. 

    Matthew 18:21-22 King James Version (KJV)

    21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

    22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

    Many people are babes in the faith and they don’t see the spiritual war going on. (Read Ephesians 6, in the Bible). We know we are not fighting against flesh and blood but we know within ourselves we war against our flesh. When it comes to other people, they may say things that they don’t mean, but don’t let it hold weight over your destiny or dictate who you are in the spirit. You are a DAUGHTER of the King… you are a warrior…. we are rising up for such a time as this and cannot be distracted by defeat and discouragement. 

    Shake the dust off your feet, and forgive 7×70, and as Jesus said, if they reject you they he kept moving from town to town preaching the Gospel. Some people won’t like you, or your calling, and some even closest to you, like Joseph’s brothers in the Bible, May push you into a pit because of jealousy. Joseph was falsely accused and placed into a prison but little did his brother’s know (his enemies), they pushed him into his promotion! 

    “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” (Genesis 50:20) 

    God is working it all for your good! (Romans 8:28) Even when Jospeh was in prison, he had favor and his gifts made room for him! He interpreted the King’s dreams and was even forgotten by the two in jail who said they wouldn’t forget him when they got out! They did forget him, but even so GOD DIDN’T forget Jospeh and he was promoted as second in command to the King! Joseph was a dreamer and his own family was jealous of him because he had the coat of many colors from his father, he had the favor and the giftings, but in the end Jospeh had CHARACTER. Joseph could have lorded over his riches and position to his brothers but instead, he extended forgiveness. 

    PI girls, that’s how WE should be..we are royalty and Queens raise one another up, we don’t tear one another down. Who do YOU need to forgive today and quietly pray for? Comment below!!! 

    Message me for prayer requests or extra questions: @christigiven 

    Christi Given
    Christi Given
    Christi Given is a former Trinity Broadcasting Network host for the JUCE TV NETWORK, and has been featured on the Hillsong Channel. Her passion is to reach the youth with the Gospel and her music. Given has been writing for Project Inspired since 2011, and hopes to encourage the younger generation in their faith.

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