I am sure we have all experienced the heavy, exhausting and defeating influences of our culture and the media.
I believed that my worth came from what guys thought of me [and] who I was in comparison to other girls, [so] I did everything in my power to [ensure] these things:
- [I wanted to be sure everyone thought] I was attractive. I would spend so much time straightening my wild, crazy hair because I thought my big, curly Afro was not beautiful. I would also wear makeup at all times of the day and refused to allow anyone to see me without it.
- I dressed to show off my body. Yup, that means tight shirts, tight pants and not always very modest.
- I easily agreed with people and would never bring up my faith, values or morals.
It took me years to be able to move on from this. To be exact, it took me five, and I am still continuing to chase after God’s heart and love rather than the acceptance of man. Then I realized God made me exactly like this, and this is how I am the most beautiful. I am beautiful on the inside, too, because of God’s grace and wisdom that He has helped me to attain through trials and serving Him.
There are two Bible verses that had a huge impact on [my] journey of learning to love myself and chase after God’s heart:
1. For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. (Psalm 139:13-14)
Take a second to think about what that really means. Let it sink in. That means that YOU—yes you, the girl who was never considered good enough, never pretty enough, never smart enough, never funny enough according to man—were created in God’s PERFECT image. And when I say perfect, I mean perfect. He put you together. He carefully crafted you. He thinks you’re a masterpiece. He loves you endlessly and made incredible plans for you. Just think about that! You are so significant, so special and so loved that the Creator of the entire Universe took special time aside just to craft YOU. Accept that love. Believe it.
2. Charm is deceitful and vain, but a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)
Now think about this one. We are told all the time that we are defined by what we look like and what we wear, but it is SO much more than that! “A woman who FEARS the Lord shall be praised.” Not “a woman who fears man, fears judgment of the girls around her or receives all the attention from guys.”
Now, I know what you’re probably thinking: “It’s just not that easy…not all girls believe they’re beautiful according to society, and not all girls fit the beauty standards.” I get that, and that is a hard, vicious cycle of unhealthy thinking to break. But you have to realize that you are so important and so beautiful according to the most important being…and that is your Creator. So ladies, begin to pray for God to fill you up with His love and peace. Ask him to help you accept that grace and realize how precious you really are to Him.
Finally, to end this, there is a song called “He Knows My Name” by Francesca Battistelli. This song really had a huge impact on me. The whole song is about how much God adores and loves us. (Link to the song is below.) There’s a line that says, “He calls me chosen, free, forgiven, wanted, Child of the King. His forever, found in treasure…I am loved.” And I tell myself that every single day. It has made me love myself and realize God’s love for me.
Ladies, don’t let the world trouble you! You are amazing and loved!