“Help! My Brothers Act Ungodly! How Do I Make Them Put God First?”
Written by Ask Olivia | March 4, 2015
I am 19 years old and quite old-fashioned, I guess. I have three older brothers who all have girlfriends. None of them are quite Godly men. They’re more caught up in earthly things than Godly things. We’ve been fighting these days because our views are different. … Two of my brothers have been bringing their girlfriends [home] and I feel that they should have a little more respect when coming to the house; after all, they’re still living under our parents’ roof. One of my brothers brings his girlfriend [over] whenever my mother is not home, and she isn’t a Godly woman either. Another brother brings [his] girlfriend [home] and lets her sleep over even though he and my oldest brother are sharing rooms. I know they’re all still pure and plan on waiting till they get married—that’s only because I give them a speech on waiting. I just don’t think that the way they are living is getting them any closer to God. Every time I tell them about God, they call me a saint. I know I don’t have a boyfriend, that I am waiting and putting God above everything else, but is just the way I live. What should I do to make them see that if they put God first, they’ll be much happier and would find peace?
Hey girl, thanks for entrusting me with your question.
I know it can be really frustrating and somewhat scary when the people we love behave in an ungodly way. Sure, we should try to share God’s Word with them, but ultimately, that’s all we can do. Have you heard the saying “You can bring a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink”? Well, this is the same for your brothers.
If you’re looking for validation, then yes, you’re right. Based on what you’ve written, your brothers are not acting Godly. Going against your parents’ rules is disrespectful and having girls sleep over is inappropriate. But all you can do is tell them this and pray for them. The rest is up to them.
The fact that your brothers call you a “saint” is an indication that they’re not taking you seriously.
So, here’s what I think you should do:
- Continue to follow your desire to be the best Christian you can be. You can show the light to others, but being the light is a more effective way to evangelize. Hopefully, they will see that following God’s Commandments is the better way.
- Be there for your brothers. They already know how you feel, so there’s no point in continuing to upset yourself by arguing with them. Maybe one day they will see that what they are doing is wrong and they may come to you for guidance.
- Pray for the strength to continue following Christ. It won’t be easy when your brothers are following the world. You need to stay strong in your faith by continuing to grow close to God. Prayer is fundamental in this relationship.
- Pray that God not only opens their eyes to His truth, but also their hearts to the desire to follow it.
Good luck and God bless!
Need some advice? Ask your relationship questions in the Ask Olivia Girl Talk forum or in the comments below and I might answer them in a future article!