Despite what you may think from reading my articles on here on Project Inspired, I’m no stranger to the premarital sex temptation. Seriously girls, before I repented and returned to God, I was pretty much having sex with any guy who paid attention to me and made me feel even a tiny bit special.
It’s hard to describe what it did to my heart. It’s only by God’s grace that my heart is healed and that I didn’t get pregnant or contract a sexually transmitted disease.
Girls, I know people who say having sex before you’re married is no big deal. I can assure you those people are either still pretty young or unwilling to face the fact that their own behaviors have been the cause of some of their emotional difficulties in life.
I’m not here to judge anyone who’s given in to the temptation to have sex before marriage; remember I’m one of you. I just want to share my heart and what I believe is God’s heart on the subject having experienced it myself.
For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion like the Gentiles who do not know God. (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5)
God’s Word talks about fleeing from sexual immorality, and although the world doesn’t consider having multiple sexual partners to be immoral today, in biblical times such activity was considered sexual immorality.
If you read the Song of Solomon you’ll find a lot about sex and sexual types of interaction, and the reason is God considers sex to be the highest form of physical intimacy.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24, Mark 10:8, Ephesians 5:31)
I know people who begin relationships in high school or even middle school, end up getting married and stay together forever, but that’s the exception, not the rule, for a relationship.
Imagine having premarital sex with a partner, engaging in what God deems to be the highest form of physical intimacy between two people, and that relationship ending. Emotionally, this causes a tear in our heart and we question our value. Eventually this causes bitterness to develop in our personality and heart.
God doesn’t want us to question how valuable and precious we, His daughters, are.
When Dave and I married, he was a virgin. He had saved himself for his future wife, for me. I, however, hadn’t done the same for him. While I received someone shiny and new, Dave was receiving used goods, and though he’s never made me feel anything but special and loved, I’ve always felt that he got the unfair end of that deal and I know he struggled with insecurity when we were newly intimate after we got married.
God is also practical. He knew a multitude of diseases would eventually appear and taint what He originally created for our pleasure, which is another reason His Word encourages us to flee from sexual immorality in all forms, including premarital sex.
Girls, we’re God’s precious and beloved daughters, prized far above rubies. That’s the most important thing to know.
If you’ve given into the temptation of premarital sex, know that you’re not alone. Know that God isn’t angry with you and He isn’t going to send you away from His presence. He loves and adores you.
I know this part will be hard to hear, but you’ll need to confess your sin to the Lord, repent and ask His forgiveness because His word considers sex outside of marriage as sin under the heading of sexual immorality.
God is good and faithful. He loves us above all things and He’s quick to forgive when we ask. God isn’t waiting to punish you, daughter, He’s waiting to hold you tight and restore your heart. Let Him.
For Your steadfast love is before my eyes, and I walk in Your faithfulness. (Psalm 26:3)
Girls, have you felt the pressure to have premarital sex? How can I pray for you?
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