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    Q&A – How Do I Ask My Parents for a Purity Ring?

    Question:

    How do I ask my parents for a purity ring?

    Answer:

    Before asking for a purity ring, I highly suggest taking a bit of time to really think about why you want one. Purity rings are not just another piece of jewelry to be worn simply because we like them. A purity ring serves more than one purpose.

    • It’s a promise between you and God that you’ll remain sexually pure until after you’re married.
    • It’s a testimony to everyone you meet that you’ve made this promise.

    Think very carefully about it before approaching your parents to ask for a purity ring. Remember that receiving and committing to wearing a purity ring is a promise to God.

    When you make this promise to God, the devil will throw every temptation he can at you. There’ll be several cute boys many who may say that they’re interested in you but who may be more interested in challenging your boundaries.

    You’ll also need to be prepared to defend what you believe and why you believe it. I suggest before asking your parents you read up on what the Bible says about sexual purity. If your parents are not believers, I also suggest doing some research on sexually transmitted diseases to defend your decision to remain pure. There’s one more question you may need to answer, especially if your parents are not believers:

    Why do you need a ring to stay pure? Can’t you decide to stay pure without a ring?

    This question is why it’s so important to prepare before asking your parents for a purity ring. You need to know exactly why it is that you want a purity ring. Will you use it as a tool for evangelism, to share God with others? Do you respond well to visual reminders? In that case, the ring will serve as a constant reminder to you in tempting situations. You need to know how to answer this question honestly.

    Once you’ve prepared through prayerful consideration, approach your parents and let them know you would like to talk to them about something important to you. Ask when a good time would be for them to have that conversation with you. Don’t rush them and be respectful of their time.

    When you finally sit down to have this conversation, remembering a few key points will help make it pleasant, regardless of your parents’ answer.

    • The decision to remain pure is a mature decision. So in your conversation with your parents, don’t resort to immature behaviors like yelling or whining if things don’t seem to be going your way.
    • Your purity ring is a covenant symbol between you and God; your behavior when asking for it and when wearing it will speak to others about both your relationship with God and who God is. With this in mind, have grace when asking for your ring. God gives us grace all the time and it’s important we extend grace to others, including our parents.
    • Remember that any discussion of purity is going to involve some talk of sex. For many parents, fathers especially, talking about sex with their daughters is very difficult and can make them uncomfortable. Choose your words carefully and do your best to keep the conversation respectful.

    Regardless of whether or not your parents are believers, it’s likely they’ll be proud of your decision to remain sexually pure, but it’s your job to help them understand why this is important to you and why you need or want a symbol to support your decision.

    PI girls, do you have any other advice about asking for a purity ring?

    Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe (1 Timothy 4:12).

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    Jenn Arman
    Jenn Arman is a youth pastor, freelance writer and blogger. She was born in San Diego, California and raised 2 hours north east in the Inland Empire where she lives with her husband David and their cats. Jenn desires to bring glory to God and a healthy dose of reality to Christians through both writing and preaching. Visit jenniferarman.com for more on her work. You can also connect with her on www.facebook.com/JenniferArman.Writer and https://twitter.com/JennArman

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