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Christian Life

Q&A – How Do I Help Someone in My Life Understand and Get Closer to God?


How do I help someone in my life understand and get closer to God? How can I help them understand what it means to be a Christian and why it’s important?


A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:34-35.

This question is dear to my heart because I also have people that I am very close to in my life who don’t understand or have a close relationship with God. The best way we can help people understand and get closer to God is by living our lives the way God wants us to. Love others the way that God loves us, unconditionally for the most basic reason — because the living God also created them. If your own life isn’t perfect, if you don’t “have it all together”, don’t act like you do just because you’re close to God. People need to know that God loves ‘messed up’ people, too!

If nonbelievers in your life ask you questions about God, answer them as best as you can. If you don’t know the answer, tell them you aren’t sure, but you’ll try to find out and get back to them. Then, ask a parent or pastor who would have an answer. Make sure you follow through. God is consistent, He never breaks His promises and neither should we.

Don’t call them “sinners” and tell them that they are going to Hell. This just makes people feel bad. The best way to communicate eternity is to tell them that God loves them and wants all of His kids to be with Him, but He gives us the choice. It’s our decision if we want to spend our lives with God or without Him.

Live a life that produces the Fruit of the Spirit: Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Don’t preach at people. Don’t yell at them. Don’t make them feel bad. Be an example. Love them. Pray for them. Encourage them. Be patient with them. Tell them the truth in love. Be humble. Spend time with them. Love them when it’s hard. This is what Jesus did.

Written by Jenn Arman

Image: iStockphoto


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  1. Project Inspired

    Posted by Kathrie on November 30, 2011 at 16:41

    I’ve always felt this way about my dad. He’s not a christian. I know he was baptized and he used to go to church, but he doesn’t anymore and he tells me that he’s not a christian. I love him and I want to know that after he dies he will be waiting in heaven for me, but that won’t happen if he continues acting the way he does. I know this is kind of an old topic but I just started and can someone please help me? I just want to cry whenever I think about this. Please help. I’m praying but I still can’t see anything happening.

    • Posted by Nicole on November 30, 2011 at 23:40

      I am praying for your dad. I hope he turns to God!

  2. Posted by on September 16, 2011 at 10:29

    I have a friend that is very stubborn, picky and strong willed. In all the same i love her, and I’ve wanted her to become a christian for so long. I’ve prayed and brought her to church, but she still wont budge. What else can i do???

    • Posted by Nicole on September 16, 2011 at 18:06

      just keep praying for her and ask God to work on her heart. Also, show her my website! It will probably touch her. 😉

  3. Posted by on September 15, 2011 at 17:39

    I have two friends they both are struggling. One use to love God just as much as me but now she has a hard time believing that he’s even there and she just thinks the Bible is a book of rules how do I help her understand, shes hurting so much and pushing God away while she’s add it please pray for her and please help I need advice.

  4. Posted by on September 7, 2011 at 08:47

    I have a cousin who claims he is a Christian but he doesn’t act like one. How can I help him?

    • Posted by on September 16, 2011 at 10:30

      Just keep praying.

  5. Posted by on September 5, 2011 at 01:18

    What about when they want proof?

    • Posted by Nicole on September 8, 2011 at 13:17

      I’ll write an article soon about this! stay tuned!

  6. Posted by on September 4, 2011 at 22:28

    ok so, like ALL my friends LOVE Harry Potter, i dont, i dispise it and they tell me to read it cuz “its good”. i tell them i hate fantasy and that type of stuff. but one particular friend says that she is a “witch” and it waiting for her “hogwarts letter to come”. she says she is catholic but i really want to tell her to dont read or watch any of tht stuff and i have once she got mad and started saying “i read it because its good, and u should too”. then, i get mad cuz she doesnt get the stuff that the devil has put in there about witchcraft. i wanna tell all of them to just stop talking about it. i know all of them are Christians. and i know that its taking them away from God cuz at least once a day i hear “harry potter”. Please can you help me to have them all stop talking and believing this harry potter stuff?

    • Posted by on October 26, 2011 at 13:08

      I’m Harry Potter-obsessed, although not quite as much as I used to be. But just know that it is not real, and that I don’t think there’s anything really wrong with it in moderation. I’m glad you’re concerned about your friends, though, and if it’s really bothering you just let them know in a polite way that you’re a little bit tired of always hearing about Harry Potter.

    • Posted by Nicole on September 8, 2011 at 13:18

      I would say let them do their thing, because what they’re taking about is fantasy, not real life. I think it’s pretty harmless really. Plus, they’ll grow out of it. 🙂

  7. Posted by on September 1, 2011 at 14:56

    This is very encouraging, thank you.. I’ve been patient for almost a year now with this guy who is a best friend to me. He doesnt believe in God or Christianity and I admit it is very hard at sometimes, but him not being a Christian has brought me closer to God.. I have faith that one day he will choose to believe :)God Bless!

  8. Posted by on August 30, 2011 at 23:39

    That’s so true! Can you write an article about your child being more religious then your parents? Because my parents don’t appreciate my faith. 🙂

    • Posted by Nicole on September 3, 2011 at 12:42

      yes I will in the future! Stay faithful to God, and pray for them.

  9. Posted by on August 22, 2011 at 08:13

    I know that it helps when you fully devote your life to God. Not just accepting him into your heart, but surrendering your entire being.Then, people will definetly start to notice, especially if you go to a public school. Some people will ask questions, like, “Why are you always so happy?” “How can you live a drama-free life?” And then you say, “I am not always happy, and I have lots of drama just like you, but I have Jesus Christ in my heart and he helps me through it all” This may stir up more questions or it may scare them off, but you know you have at least tried. If they are curious, tell them about the gospel and the benefits of being a christian (like having a relationship with God and, of course, going to heaven!!!) If they are still interested, invite them to church or your youth group. Just remember, some people will make fun of you, but you must walk the christian walk and turn the other cheek, and not act on angry feelings or thoughts. I hope this helps!!! 🙂

  10. Posted by on August 20, 2011 at 19:30

    I have people who I care about dearly who don’t know God, and it breaks my heart that they may not have eternity with them. I want them to understand and know that I care and God cares. This helps a lot. Thank you! God bless!!

  11. Posted by on August 19, 2011 at 21:26

    The closer to God you are,the more people he puts in your path for you to help. Trust me,I know.

    • Posted by on September 27, 2011 at 16:29

      Hey I like this- If you just stay by God’s side he will bring people to you- you need to reach out your hand to them but you don’t need to chase after them and try to cobcvert them yourselves!

    • Posted by on August 23, 2011 at 15:14

      I await your censorship. Riddle me this… why would god put me hear for you to censor…. and censoring only creates illusion by hiding the reality. I’m here for our sake. just watch what your putting in your head.

  12. Posted by on August 19, 2011 at 08:01

    i have always wanted to know how to get people closer to God without seeming all goody two shoes. I’v been called that before but i let it slide cause i knew that i wasnt- am not perfect. Loving them and caring about them, encouraging them, these are all ways to do that. Thanks for the article! 🙂