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Inspiration

Q&A: Nicole, How Can I Help My Friend Who’s Depressed?

QUESTION:

My friend is depressed. I don’t know what to do. I’ve used Scriptures, told her that she’s loved and beautiful, but she always responds with, “I just can’t fill that emptiness in my heart.”

ANSWER:

This question was posted in the forums by ButterflyKis435. Here’s my answer: First of all, show your friend unconditional love and support. Think about also setting aside some time to make something nice for her to show that you’re thinking about her. Maybe get a picture of you two and get it framed.

Take it a step further and create a collage with words that your friend encompasses: passion, friendship, faith, pretty smile, etc. Music can also be very powerful to lift a friend’s spirits. Create a CD of inspiring, happy songs with loving messages about how special and loved she is. Help her strengthen her faith, which will provide comfort–get her a book about Jesus’ teachings. I would highly recommend the book His Princess: Love Letters from Your King by Sheri Rose Shepherd.

You could also get her a nice bottle of perfume or spend time having a “girl” day — you can both have fun together doing facials and mani/pedis at home. Top it off with a fun sleepover and watch an uplifting comedy like Elf.🙂

Love,
Nicole

Image: Thinkstock | istockphoto

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9 Comments

  1. Project Inspired

    Posted by Domino on October 10, 2012 at 10:26

    These suggestions are all well and good for a girl friend, but what about a guy friend, or a friend you aren’t really close to (both relationship wise and distance wise)?

    • Project Inspired

      Posted by on October 10, 2012 at 14:23

      A guy can benefit from consulting a counselor just as much as a girl can. They tend to be slightly more reluctant to open up about their problems because many of them have been taught a skewed type of masculinity. While it’s great to be kind to people who are depressed and try to encourage them, sometimes they need to talk to a professional.

      As for people you don’t know very well, there isn’t a lot that you can do. However, if you have any reason to think they’re planning to harm themselves (or someone else), you need to tell someone right away. Express your concerns to an adult who can help, like a school counselor or a parent who can convey the message to the people who need to know about the situation.

  2. unicorns4567

    Posted by unicorns4567 on October 9, 2012 at 17:24

    is it ok for christians to have christmas tree’s? just curious. any have any advice?

    • Nellie

      Posted by Nellie on October 9, 2012 at 20:22

      Aww Christmas trees are the best!! Especially the real ones that fill the whole house with their pleasant smells!! If the history of how the trees came about just don’t think about it at all. The whole message of Christmas is the spirit of giving. Ultimately the gift of Jesus Christ, but the way we all celebrate that is by giving and recieving presents. I don’t think my favorite holiday would be the same with out the tree.

  3. Paris

    Posted by Paris on October 9, 2012 at 13:18

    Great solution Nicole!

  4. Dee

    Posted by Dee on October 9, 2012 at 12:50

    I wish I’d had someone around to answer this question a few years ago when my best friend was having a super hard time. She started seeing a counselor, and that helped a lot, but she still really needed people to show her love and support. I didn’t know how to do that. (I know, that sounds really lame, but I seriously didn’t know what to say or do once I realized how bad it really was.) On top of that, I was having a hard time with the loss of a family member, so I figured I’d just let her deal. I feel horrible when I look back. I wish I’d done more. Thank God she’s doing much better. She’s no longer hurting herself, and she has a lot of good days. She’ll never be the same, but she’s back to being an encouraging, loving goofball.

  5. Project Inspired

    Posted by Kelly2_0 on October 9, 2012 at 12:02

    Also- Take into consideration that maybe she’s in an abusive situation, or has a medical disorder that makes her prone to depression. If she’s fine medically, then go for it, but if she’s not.. there’s a time and place for prayer, but please, let medical professionals handle these situations.

  6. olburrows

    Posted by olburrows on October 9, 2012 at 11:44

    I agree with MsJael915. Some of those things are only temporary. It is always great to open up with an individual and let it all out. 🙂

  7. Project Inspired

    Posted by on October 9, 2012 at 07:23

    Why does no one recommend counseling?! Therapy works! Sometimes you can’t just pray the blue away, and the happiness from music or movies or girl time or whatever only lasts so long. Get her talking to someone, a school counselor or a therapist outside of school, someone she can trust with her issues who is QUALIFIED to treat her…not someone who is just going to hold her hand and pray for her. That’s all well and good, but sometimes it takes real psychology and medical training.