Q&A: “Should I Obey My Parents or God?”

    Q: My parents disagree with my faith. Do I obey them or God?

    A: To answer this question, I want to start with a quick look at four of the Ten Commandments.

    • You shall have no other gods before Me.
    • You shall not make for yourself an idol, or any likeness of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth.
    • You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not leave him unpunished who takes His name in vain.
    • Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of the Lord your God…For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them and rested on the seventh day…

    Each of the first four commandments deals with our relationship with God. The last six commandments deal with our relationships with others. God gave us instructions regarding our relationship with Him first and that’s the same way God expects us to live our lives.

    I don’t like encouraging anyone to disobey their parents and that’s not what I’m trying to do, but when it comes to our relationship priorities, God expects to come first in our lives.

    Jesus is perfect and we desire to be like Him. Jesus always put God ahead of His earthly family, even when He was still young. If we look at Luke chapter 2, we see that 12-year-old Jesus stayed behind when His parents left Jerusalem after Passover.


    And as they were returning, after spending the full number of days, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. But His parents were unaware of it. (Luke 2:43)


    When His parents returned for Him, they were angry and asked Him why He’d treated them disrespectfully, causing them anxiety. Jesus answered with two questions: “Why is it that you were looking for Me? Did you not know that I had to be in My Father’s house?” (Luke 2:49)

    If your parents disagree with your faith, I encourage you to continue putting God first in your life. After God, however, make obeying, respecting and honoring your parents your second relationship priority and pray for your parents.

    Let your obedience to and respect for your parents show them how God is transforming your life.


    “Truly I tell you,” Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age: homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—along with persecutions—and in the age to come eternal life. (Mark 10:29-30)

    Girls, do you have some advice on living for God when your parents disagree?


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    Jenn Arman
    Jenn Arman is a youth pastor, freelance writer and blogger. She was born in San Diego, California and raised 2 hours north east in the Inland Empire where she lives with her husband David and their cats. Jenn desires to bring glory to God and a healthy dose of reality to Christians through both writing and preaching. Visit for more on her work. You can also connect with her on and


    1. Wow, I have been blessed with parents that believe as I do, but my struggle is my friends I have a best friend in the whole world but she and me don’t believe the same , she believes in God but that’s as far as it goes and living a worldly party life is all she wants. What should I do I don’t want to loose her but I don’t want to loose God over her.??? Advice please thank you 🙂

      • I’m also having the same problem. I have been acting weird, beside my BFF. She broke my trust with her because she has lied, hasn’t wanted to do anything with me since we were little. I met her while my Older sister babysat them since 2000 or earlier. She has made me not to be around her any more and killed our friendship together. We have not to each other since she has done that to me.

    2. What if your parents believe the same as you but you want to go to a different church as them because you believe That God wants you at this church. But my parents have forbidden me From going to this church because it’s not where they go…

    3. I have a question. So I’m currently with a guy. I’m almost 19 and he’s my first boyfriend. I’ve waited so long and I’ve finally found someone I can see myself with. We’ve been careful and everything, and we’re not going to have sex before we’re married. At this point in our relationship, we think it’s okay for us to kiss because we really care about each other. However, my parents have said they won’t bless our relationship if we kiss. His parents are okay with us kissing. In the beginning, we held off but recently we’ve kissed a few times here and there. What do I do? I feel it’s okay but I don’t want to disrespect my parents.

      • Pray and do what God wants you to do. Keep Him at the center of your relationship. I personally want to save my first kiss for marriage but everyone is different. As long as you feel God is okay with it, then it’s okay. Focus on Him. Don’t worry about others opinions. Good luck and continue serving God:)

    4. Obey your parents in all aspects, but when it comes to your personal relationship with Christ, follow Him. Sometimes parents are blinded by their own emotions but they do have a larger knowledge of life. If your parents are believers or unbelievers you must still treat them with respect. Listen to their words, pray, fast, try to understand where your parents are coming from (they’ve had a larger amount of experience).

    5. Be kind and loving. Always obey them (as long as it’s not anything against the word of God). Be a true reflection and example of Christ. Don’t be judgemental to them. Just treat them as Jesus would. They’ll see the difference in you and want to know the source.

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