We had the opportunity to read through Nicole Weider’s brand-new book, Project Inspired: Tips and Tricks for Staying True to Who You Are. And we absolutely loved it. It’s a great read and it serves as a guide for Christian girls who want to stay true to their spiritual beliefs and core values. Although the book won’t be out until later this year, we wanted to share a few things that we learned after reading it. Hopefully these tidbits will hold you over until the book officially comes out.
So over the next few weeks, we’ll be releasing a series of articles that will collectively be known as “The Christian Girl’s Guide.” This week, we’re kicking things off with “The Christian Girl’s Guide to Finding the ‘Right’ Guy”!
Nicole’s Tip: Learn to be happy alone. If you’re not happy alone, it’s impossible to be happy in a relationship. If you think that it’s lonely being without a boyfriend, that feeling is only multiplied if you find yourself lonely in a bad marriage and stuck—either because you have children with him or you’re against divorce at all costs.
Before you begin to look for the right guy, it’s important to first focus on yourself. So many girls enter into relationships simply because they do not want to be alone. That’s no reason to bring a guy into your life. Yes, it may feel good at first, but it’s only temporary. Eventually, those feelings of loneliness will reemerge and you’ll start to bring problems into your relationship. So step 1 is to make sure that you are completely happy with just being around yourself.
Once you’ve prepared yourself, it’s important to find the right guy for you! Now, everybody’s “right” guy will have different characteristics. However, there are certain core traits that you should look for in every man that you date. Here are just a few from Nicole:
- He is compassionate. Not only to you, but also to his own parents and strangers he meets. (Just remember, no one is perfect, not even your dream guy.) If he makes a mistake, is he willing to admit it? That’s a good sign.
- He’s drama-free. Soap operas may be fun to watch on television, but they can make for a miserable life if every decision and conversation between you and the boy you’re with becomes a drama. Find someone who perhaps enjoys watching drama, but doesn’t want to live it!
- He’s truthful. You can trust his word. He always tells the truth, even in small matters. He’s never caught in a lie about a silly thing, because that isn’t in his character.
- He’s loving. Not just physically, but emotionally. He speaks words of love and tells you how much he cares for you and how happy he is to be with you—and means it. Words of affection are very important in a loving relationship.
“Love is the most enticing, wonderful, thrilling feeling in the world, and maybe that’s why heartbreak is so very devastating. After that thrilling joyride of ‘what could be,’ sometimes there is the reality of nursing a broken heart. A broken heart is not something I’d wish on anyone, but there is a chance you may experience one in your life. This is why I feel it’s so important to protect your heart as much as possible before marriage. Remember, scripture tells us above all else to guard our hearts.” —Nicole
To read more of Nicole’s tips for finding the right guy, pre-order a copy of her BRAND-NEW book here.