Tips for Ending A Relationship

    Whether it’s a boyfriend that you’ve been dating for two months or a best friend that you’ve known for years, ending a relationship is a difficult task. Here are a few tips to make the experience a little more bearable for both of you.

    • Always end a relationship with a spirit of love. The Bible tells us to “do everything in love” (1 Corinthians 16:14.) Although you can’t control the reaction of the other person, you can choose to speak gentle words in a loving manner. This will make the experience more tolerable for both of you!
    • Be honest! Sometimes it may seem easier to give an untrue reason about why you’ve chosen to end things. However, it’s always better to be honest. Use kind words but always be straightforward and truthful. Also remember to avoid giving someone false hope. If you don’t plan to resume the relationship, make sure that it’s very clear. God tells us “show proper respect to everyone” (1 Peter 2 :17) which means always being upfront and honest with others.
    • Be firm. You can be kind while still being firm. Don’t let anyone pressure you into continuing a relationship that you really want to end. This is especially true if the relationship is toxic or abusive. YOU SHOULD NEVER STAY IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP! If you’re in an abusive relationship, please seek help immediately.
    • Set boundaries. It’s up to you how much the other person is in your life after the relationship ends. If you still want to remain friends with an ex, that’s fine. However, if you’d rather downscale even further to just acquaintances, that’s fine, too. Whatever you decide is okay, just avoid giving mixed messages. If the other person doesn’t respect your decision to end the relationship and is continually harassing or threatening you, seek help from a trusted adult IMMEDIATELY.

    Ending a relationship is always a difficult process. However, it can be done in a way that minimizes the frustration for all involved. Hope this helps!

    Aysha Ives
    Aysha Ives loves God with her whole heart and has a desire to help hurting people. With a Masters Degree in Psychology, she combines her education and experience with her love for God to help people live whole and fulfilled lives. Aysha is an Author, Mental Health Provider, Youth Church Teacher, and the mother of one gifted little boy whom she absolutely adores. Aysha is honored to be able to share her love of God with Project Inspired readers. Aysha is also the author of God Cares About Your Stuff: How To Believe For Tomorrow When Things Look Utterly, Completely, And Totally Impossible Today, released February 2013- Available at Amazon.


    1. I wish I could figure this out. I don’t think it would help with ending my realationship with my boyfriend. He’s so sweet, that I almost don’t want to end the realationship, but I feel like I need to 🙁

    2. I’m 14. I liked him, and I still do. It’s just if I tell my friends they would say “Him? You can do better than that.” Like they always say. He really likes me though, and he says he wants to stay with me as long as possible but I know that one happen…

    3. Im 15 and me and my boyfriend strongly beleive in god and our personal values but lately we have been drawing further and further away from each other and i do beleive that he is the best boyfriend that i have ever had but i dont feel the way i used to around him i dont love him anymore… 🙁

      • If you’re heart is telling you these things and you feel that way, it is God whispering to your heart telling you to focus on Him, rather than on your boyfriend. And don’t you worry, God has Mr. Right waiting for you in the future!

    4. I ended a relationship with my best friend (9 years at the time) because she was hanging out with this other friend every weekend and blowing me off, acting like I needed to fit her schedule. I still feel like I didn’t do the right thing, and that I overreacted. The pain after this has stayed with me ever since. I feel awful because I look at the girl who she hangs out with and did at the time and I hate her. I honestly hate her and the other girl because I feel like they took her away from me. I’m still working on trying to forgive them, it’s difficult but I will try to power through! 🙂

    5. I’m trying to ease away from a friendship because this girl, even though she is sweet and such, makes me nervous and uncomfortable because she does not respect that I don’t like certain words. On the other hand, I don’t wanna break away from the relationship because she doesn’t have many friends. This guide helped me 🙂

    6. So I’m Pentecostal and my boyfriend is from a Calvary chapel.. My parents thought they believed the same we did but after visiting a few times and having talks with my boyfriend we found that there were a few things that we didn’t believe the same.. We were together for over a year and I ended it. My parents told me I should , and it took a long while before I did. We chose to remain friends but I know he still has hope of being together one day. I don’t know what to say.. Honestly I want to be able to with him but my parents don’t approve and honestly I do wanna be with someone who’s into church and believes like me. He is very involved because he’s a pastors kid. He does loves The Lord.. But our beliefs arnt the same. Now if he’s somewhere I can’t go because my parents won’t let me for fear I’m gonna go back with him. I hear all the time “he’s not for me”.. I understand but I don’t. I wish my parents would have more trust and I wish I knew how to tell him that we probably won’t have that type of future together no matter how my we want it. Were friends now and I like that.. But he still has hope and my parents have a weird thing with him. I don’t want to lose my bestfriend (him) but I don’t want to hurt him either. What should I do?:,(

      • Honestly, if he’s a christian, as you say he is. Then denominations shouldn’t matter. Not that much anyway. As long as the two of you can discuss it and keep enough of an open mind that you can truly listen to what the other is saying. But I wouldn’t say to go against your parents.

        I would talk with you parents. Sit down with them and listen. And be honest with them about how you feel. They may know something you don’t and have a very good reason for you not going out with him.

        I would suggest the same for you and him. Letting him hope like that won’t do either of you any good.

      • I seriously had almost the same situation happen to me. I am basically a non-denominational Christian and my now ex-boyfriend is Church of Christ. Before we dated we had talked about Jesus and faith enough that I trusted that he had a personal relationship with Christ so I figured any differences we had wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Well, after we had dated for three months we got to talking about the bible and salvation and he had some beliefs that I simply did not agree with, a few of them were petty and I could have lived with them and agreed to disagree. But there were a few other differences we had that neither of us were willing to compromise, I was willing to agree to disagree but he was not. In fact he began to question my salvation, of which I am most confident. When I pictured my future children I didn’t want them to be torn between two religious doctrines, and I certainly wasn’t going to be comfortable attending a church whose beliefs I did not agree with, and I knew that he would never go to my church. I talked to my parents about it, and while they encouraged me to speak truth to him I could tell they were regretting having allowed me to date him. Our conflicting religious views amoung other differences in our personalities eventu led me to break up with him

        • After I broke up with him he was heart broken and tried countless times not only to ‘convert me’ but also to get me back. The way I see it we simply were not meant to be and both of us will find someone one day who makes us far happier than we ever could have made each other.

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