To the Girl Who Was Not Fought For

    To the girl who was not fought for:

    By your father.

    By your mother.

    By your boyfriend.

    By your friends at school.

    Whoever did not fight to stay with or near you, whoever abandoned and neglected you—their actions do not define who you are. Their failure is not a reflection of your value.

    I realize these words are hard to believe. You’re probably reading them and disbelieving them at the same time. It’s hard to let go of the things so deeply ingrained in your heart; things confirmed through patterns of pain.

    But God.

    In that well-known verse we quote in Sunday school—John 3:16—we see a truth that frees us from the hurt of others. For God so loved, He gave. He gave when He was rejected, scorned and killed. He gave when he was not fought for or loved back. He gave so you could receive unconditional love.

    When you feel abandoned, He does not abandon you.

    When you feel forsaken, He never forsakes you.

    When you feel rejected, He never rejects you.

    If you are in Christ, following Him, sold out to Him, His love and righteousness cover you in a robe of peace. Even when humans fail you (which they will always do!), His presence is your comfort.

    He is the Father who does not leave. Like a mother, His arms gather you in. He is a lover whose affection does not run out. He is a companion, comforter and friend. It’s easy to forget this, easy to get bound up in the “rules” and miss the relationship. But this relationship with Him is your anchor. When no one fights for you, Jesus does.

    In moments of fear, anxiety and sadness, preach these truths to yourself. With each assault of the enemy, fight back with the truth:

    You are bought by Christ.

    You are covered by His love.

    You are under His wings.

    You are held in His arms.

    You are more than what happened to you.

    You are fought for.

    As a woman who is fought for by Jesus, you have the strength to fight back against the enemy’s lies. When the lies about your identity come, choose to reject them in the name of Jesus. He has overcome ALL lies with His truth.

    Today, as you read this, take in the truth Jesus speaks over you. When you fall back into the lies, remind yourself who God is and what He’s done. God’s righteousness and kindness are the basis for your freedom. You are no longer a slave to how people treated you. You are free. You are strong.

    You are a fighter.


    Phylicia Masonheimer
    Phylicia Masonheimer
    Phylicia Masonheimer is an author and speaker teaching women how to discern what is true, discuss the deep stuff, and accomplish God's will for their specific lives. She holds a B.S. in Religion from Liberty University, where she met her husband, Josh, and now lives in northern Michigan with her two daughters, Adeline and Geneva.

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