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    What Do Guys Really Think About Modesty?

    Ladies, have you noticed that female fashion has become so very sexy these days? Even for young girls. If the skirt length isn’t short, then necklines are plunging or the fabrics are so sheer, they might as well not exist.

    Of course, the media plays a huge part in determining fashion trends. And as we’ve discussed many times on PI, our favorite young starlets are very eager to flaunt their assets. So why do girls like dressing in this manner? I believe it’s because they want to look sexy, attractive, and hot…to the opposite sex.

    Boys! It’s all about boys. That’s what they want, right? Boys like it, right?

    Or do they?

    Below is a video clip of different teen boys telling you what they really think about immodest dress. Do they like it? Let’s find out…

    Much of what the boys said has been mentioned here on Project Inspired. But hearing it from the source legitimizes it, I believe. These are young Christian boys who are telling Christian girls like you that if you dress immodestly, you’ll conjure up lustful thoughts in their minds.

    Dressing immodestly causes boys to stumble. They told you in their own words.

    My mind runs places when I see that, places that you don’t want my mind to go. So, if you guys want to help us out, don’t dress immodestly.

    Based on some of the comments I’ve read, I know some of you girls think that if a boy stumbles, it’s his problem, but you’re wrong. It’s your problem too, because scripture tells us not to cause our brothers to stumble.

    These boys also told you that dressing immodestly sends a negative message about you. It says that you’re easy, one boy said, and that you have no self-respect. Some of the boys even went on to say that they look to the heart when they’re looking for the right girl for them.

    The good guys care about what’s inside. What you heart is like. If you’re dressing like that, your heart’s in the wrong place.

    Ladies, the boys in this video are young Christian boys who obviously respect girls. If you meet a boy that is attracted to your “sexy” body, then he’s just that, “attracted to your body,” not you. Your physical self is presented as a sexy being, so of course any boy that’s interested is interested in what you have to offer.

    Consider this: If you go window shopping, you’re going to enter the stores with the desirable window displays, right? If you see books in a window, the store’s likely to be a bookstore. If you see shoes in a window, you assume the store sells shoes. If you see lingerie in a window, the store probably sells lingerie, right? It’s pretty logical. Well this is how a boy thinks. If you dress sexy, you must be sexual. This may not be the truth, but it’s the assumption many boys make.

    I hope this video was enlightening to you. Many girls don’t get the chance to look into the minds of boys. This is a truth pill for all young girls. This clip gives you insight about what guys really think and I pray you take their words seriously.

    Immodesty makes them uncomfortable. It leads their minds places they don’t want to go. It’s distracting. It sends the wrong message. Modesty tells boys that you have self-respect and that you have a good heart. Isn’t this the message you want to send?

    Ladies, what did you think of this clip? Did you find it enlightening? Will it affect the way you dress from now on?

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    T.M. Gaouettehttp://www.tmgaouette.com
    T.M. Gaouette is a freelance writer, ghostwriter, blogger and fiction novelist. She was born in Africa, brought up in London and is now living in New England with her husband and four children. Devoted to Him, Gaouette is dedicated to glorifying God through her stories for teens and young adults. T.M. Gaouette is the author of "The Destiny of Sunshine Ranch" and "Freeing Tanner Rose," Christian novels for teens and young adults. She's currently working on completing her upcoming novel -visit tmgaouette.com for more on her Christian fiction work. Connect with her on www.facebook.com/TMGaouette and https://twitter.com/TMGaouette .

    92 COMMENTS

    1. Ha, “Won’t wear it to Grandma’s, don’t wear it outside of the house.” I love it. It’s almost like my mom telling me “If you won’t be comfy in it while in God’s presence, don’t wear it.” 🙂 I love this article T.M. Gaouette!

    2. i hated it when the guy said that we are being degrading to ourselves. in my opinion thats not something you should say its not your right to say if someone is being degrading to themselves or not

      • But it’s true. When you dress immodestly, you’re giving parts of yourself away. When you take something out of it’s whole, the thing becomes less. So when you dress immodestly, you’re degrading yourself.

        • Exactly. Your giving your self away. And when guys look at girls with a weird look and you don’t like it it’s probably because your dressing immodestly. Just putting that out there.

      • degrading simply means “a loss of self respect”. When I see people who dress immodestly my first thought is that they are grasping for security in the way that they dress. I see it that way because this is something i struggle with
        I think of modestly and purity being somewhat the same. They are like a wedding cake:
        If you share any part of your body (or your heart) before your wedding day it is like a cake that’s had maybe even just a little piece taken off. it is no longer whole or beautiful. This is something that i struggle with a lot (modesty)because I really like to be friendly, and that can sometimes come across as flirty. If you girls would pray for God’s wisdom in my life and this issue specifically I really would appreciated it! <3

    3. I so agree with these guys, and I am a girl! I feel so awkward around my youth group girls because I don’t wear low cut tops, or tops that show my belly when I lift my arms. I never wear above the knee skirts, but some skirts that girls wear are barely there! It’s nice to know that there are guys who agree with me!

    4. I really like this video! That’s exactly how I feel about it as well. Paul told us we will be held accountable for causing our brothers to sin. I wish girls on here would understand that.

    5. You are definitely right! Girls think “I can wear what I want, if a guy looks at me the wrong way it’s HIS problem.” and yea he shouldn’t be thinking about that stuff, but you’re definitely not helping him do the right thing by going around dressed immodestly!

    6. The issue is that most Christian girls listen to what non Christian guys have to say. Why in the world should you care what they think?! The type of men that you should want to be with, the REAL men know that true beauty isn’t in between the boobs or the butt, it’s in the heart.

      Only empty girls need to show everything off.

    7. Truth:
      Boys’ hormones are TEN TIMES worse than girls!! I seriously pity them because sometimes they can’t control what there body thinks. So I’m here to just tell the truth. You can never say (well, if your a teen girl) that your BF doesn’t even want sex. I’m telling you now…he probably does. But the part that determines whether he’s worthy of your love or not is if he decides to go against his thoughts and NOT pressure you into doing immodest and sexual things. 🙂

      • This is so true! Boys can’t help it. It’s part of their nature.
        I went to church camp that’s on a beach, so naturally we are gonna be in swimsuits. The leaders made rules about how they have to be one piece and that when we were out of the water we had to have shorts. But it wasn’t for the girls, it was to help the guys.
        So boys can’t help it, but we can try to help them.

    8. Totally agree with those guys! Immodest clothes are everywhere now and sometimes it’s even hard to find clothes to buy.
      P.s. I’m waiting on God for a guy like the men in the video 🙂

    9. I really don’t like it when I go by the tween girl’s section of a store and they have the shorts so short that if you actually put your hand in the pockets, you can see them beneath the shorts. My shorts go to my knee. It’s the only thing I’m comfortable with. Tank tops are awesome underneath clothes 🙂 They keep you covered up and are super comfy 🙂
      There’s a lot of girls in my youth group that wear what I call “vag shorts” which are literally so short they look like underwear. It’s so gross. And they wear low-cut shirts and stuff. Note to you guys: even if the shirt that you have on is covered up by a tank-top, most guys are taller than you and can probably see down your shirt. Just sayin’.

    10. It’s always a shock to me when I hear guys talking about how they don’t like those kind of clothes. I’ve never really known guys, and sadly I think I’ve based my opinion of them from things like tv shows.

    11. I agree with these guys! I feel ashamed right now because I’m wearing finger length shorts and I’m tall so it makes the shorts look shorter, but what you wear in my opinion will attract people based on what you wear

    12. Omgosh I needed to hear this. I always l thought guys wanted to see “me”. I’m deff gonna listen to this. I have a real problem about dressing right cause for one, the time were in it’s hard to find cute clothes that are modest and on top for me I am big chested so it’s hard to keep “the girls” in check. My cousin came over not to long ago and I didn’t think anything was wrong with my shirt. Apparently there was because when he left the room the ladys told me that his eyes bugged out when I walked in cause my shirt was low and reveling. MY OWN COUSIN. Thanks guys. I needed this…

    13. I want to marry all of them. 🙂 Haha, that’s a joke, but seriously. I love this, these guys know what they’re talking about. They’re realistic. It’s nice to know there are still guys out there looking for girls like that, that it’s still reality and not just a fantasy come today. I love it, awesome article!! 😀

      And I just have to say this. I love the guys towards the end that says, “High school guys have no idea what they’re doing.” Hahaha! I was cracking up!! 😀

    14. this girl is a very good blogger… Would you wear it, say it, do it or think it if Jesus was sitting next to you?
      Would you want a random stranger coming over and touching you where unneccesary skin is exposed?

    15. My mom always tells me, “Don’t advertise what your not selling.” and I agree completely. I hate how hard it is to find good,modest shorts… I buy boys shorts! LOL they are comfortable and very modest. 🙂

    16. I absolutely love that video ! 🙂 (and this post) Society these days pressures girls so much into relationships and just being these unhealthy minded people. It’s so encouraging to see that there are guys out there who are really faithful and really want a genuine girl. People don’t realize how much of a big deal dating is. I mean, come on! You date because you may potentially want to marry that person!

    17. Yes, definitely we should help the guys out and not show them the outside,its just distracting them in the bad way. Show them the inside(they want to know whats in your heart), so lets distract them with our personality and be modest!

    18. I agree with this! I used to think that the best way to attract guys was to wear “sexy” clothing. But then one day I realized–If I really want a guy to like me for me, he shouldn’t like me because of my body, or because I’m “hot”, because all of those things are temporary. A guy should like me for my personality and who I am.

      If you want a GOOD guy to like you, dress classy, not trashy.
      However you dress is what you attract.

    19. This is really cool! Thanks for the advice 🙂 I’ve been really struggling with modesty lately–I feel like God’s calling me to be more modest, but it’s been hard for me. I guess I really do base a lot of my beauty on how I look on the outside 😛 I definitely want to dress in a way that honors God, though. It’s just hard to find the perfect balance of still being cute and fashionable, and being modest.

    20. Awesome video! The right kind of godly men willl be attracted to modesty. Its great to be encouraged in this way and to know that dressing modestly also pleases our Father in heaven. Praise Jesus! 🙂

    21. Thank you for posting this! Many girls on Facebook complain that “all guys are the same” and this showed me that not all guys want women for their looks. It’s way more important to be beautiful inside than be “beautiful” on the outside. To remind myself of this, I wrote Proverbs 31:30 on my mirror: Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”. Now every time I look at myself in the mirror I can remember that 🙂

      • It is so hard not to be of this world my mom actually buys me short shorts and tells me it is ok if you can see the back of your bra
        it is just hard
        and even my grandma told me that i should show off my long legs!

        • i’ll be praying for you! how bout if you tell your mom you want longer shorts? my family got pictures taken and we gave some to my grandma and when she came to my oldest sister’s picture she said “woah Melissa sexy eyes. Weird!! reply and tell me how it goes!

    22. I love this! Our church had a whole section on this and dating around Valentines day. I thought it was cool cause the youths pastor wife sat us down and we talked about this. She was telling us things her husband told her about the little things that triggers the minds of men. Men are definitely attracted by skin. Knee length dress are definitely the best way to go and she told us to practice jumping around in the mirror and raising our arms to make sure we’re not showing off anything that doesn’t need to be seen. This really changed the way I thought about modesty because I was like it’s my body and they shouldn’t be looking. When that’s really stubborn and selfish because guys can’t help it. And besides it’s God’s body not mine. 🙂 Be a Proverbs 31 girl!

    23. I liked it. It was refreshing to hear guys talk about the topic. I also liked what the guy said at the end about high school guys not being worth it. It’s funny, I’m going into my senior year of college, and I find that often times college guys can be just as immature as high school guys! If the guy is not a Christian, then it’s a definite no. If he’s a Christian, but he’s really immature…wait on God. Either the guy has to mature or God has someone else for you.

    24. also, girls… peer pressure is an issue here too. make sure you know where you stand and where your values are, cuz you never know when someone might confront you about your modest dress. like just last week, my friend Abi was like ‘why don’t you ever wear shorts? you used to wear them a lot last year’
      cuz yeah I used to wear short shorts all the time and one day I caught my friend Jonny lookin places he shouldn’t have, and he’s like basically my older brother, so that really convicted me.
      hold true to your beliefs and convictions, it saves yourself and your bros in Christ a lot of trouble.

    25. These guys didn’t mention makeup or anything, and that one verse said not to primp in front of a mirror? I love makeup, but guys don’t have a problem with it, right? (Hopefully not!)

      • i just wear whatever makeup is comfortable with me… cuz i have really dark under eye circles and i look really bland with out it… ive just come to the point to where i can wear concealer, eyeliner and mascara… that much goes along wayy!

        • also, i love this video, at first i thought all guys only care about s e x …. lol but after watching this im alot less self concious!
          thanks can u pleeeez get more vids of this stuff?

    26. This clip helped a lot with knowing what boys think of you and how you should really act. It makes me wonder what we should be really doing which is taking our time with God instead of spending time trying to get the eyes of a boy to look at you. If he only looks at you because of your body he’s obviously not worth it.

    Project Inspired

    We here at Project Inspired want to guide and inspire teen girls to be true to themselves and to God. We want to show young girls how to be people of value and confidence – how to be your own best selves – through leading a Christian life. Who are we? We're a team of girls, like you. We edit the site, we post to social media, we hang out in the chat rooms and forums. We talk with you, we listen to you, and we love you!

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