Let me begin by saying that if a boy is disrespecting you, it’s absolutely NOT okay. Whether it’s a friend, peer, or even your boyfriend, it’s never okay for a boy to be disrespectful to you. You’re God’s daughter and you deserve to be treated with the utmost respect! If you’re being disrespected, take a look at these tips to help you address the situation:
- Be direct. If a boy is being inappropriate, it’s okay to tell him to STOP. Explain to him that his behavior is inappropriate and you won’t tolerate it. Let him know that if he continues to engage in such mean-spirited behavior, you’ll get adults involved so the situation can be resolved. Keep in mind, however, that being direct doesn’t give you an invitation to be mean in return; it simply allows you the opportunity to set boundaries with others about how you expect to be treated.
- Remain calm. God is very clear that everything we do should be done in love. Although it can be quite difficult to approach mean people in a nice way, it’s a task we all have to tackle at some point or another. Always remain calm and loving during your interactions with others. When you present yourself in a loving manner, even when others are disrespectful toward you, you’re setting the example for God.
- Know your worth! Don’t internalize the mean comments of others! Know that you’re a BEAUTIFUL CHILD OF GOD and nothing anyone says can take that from you. If you want to make changes about yourself, make sure it’s because you want to be more pleasing unto God, NOT because someone is making ridiculous comments about you.
- Get help. If you’re unable to resolve the situation with this boy by yourself, then it may be time to get an adult involved. Don’t be scared to talk to a trusted adult about what’s going on. Remember, God puts people–parents, teachers and church leaders–in your life to help you. It’s always okay to seek guidance when others are mistreating you.
- Pray. Always pray about situations that you’re going through. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you the best way to deal with people who are mistreating you. He is your Counselor and He’ll reveal to you the best way to approach the situation. Also, remember to pray for the boy who is being disrespectful to you. It may be difficult to intercede for a person who has intentionally hurt you, but who knows what is going on in his life? Remember, hurt people hurt other people–and you may be the only light in this boy’s life.
- Abusive behavior should never, EVER be tolerated! If someone is “disrespecting” you in a physical manner, that’s called abuse! There are also other forms of abuse that are defined in this article. If you’re experiencing abuse in any way, it’s important you get help immediately! Please, read this article for more information about abuse and what to do if you’re experiencing it.
Dealing with people who disrespect you can be a very trying task. Although we may be tempted to become mean and disrespectful in return, it’s important to show the love of Christ in all of our interactions with others. Although it’s okay to set appropriate boundaries, AND IT’S SOMETHING YOU ABSOLUTELY SHOULD DO, don’t forget to see others through the eyes of Christ when trying to resolve the issue.
Remember, love God, love others and love yourself.